LETTERS FROM LITTLE BRITAIN.

Southland Times, Volume 2, Issue 64, 18 June 1863, Page 2

LETTERS FROM LITTLE BRITAIN.

(By the Man in the Moon.) No. 11. We have recently experienced a slight earthquake, which if we may believe the veracious> although somewhat marvellons accounts of the " Little Britain Exploder,'' has been attended with remarkable effects The " Exploder" solemnly assures its readers that they were all sea-sick, and such is the influence exercised by that talented journal, that several who at first declared they were not sea-sick, afterwards admitted the}' "thought they remembered something about it," and, finally, that they distinctly recollected all the circumstances. One individual, indeed, went so far as to assert that he fancied he was in the steamer, and called repeatedly, " s s-s-schewad — stewahd." Our chief, Dr. Faustus, who has insisted on receiving the title of " His Super-illustriousness," has suddenly changed his mind about the tramway and ordered it to be removed, and bundles of straw to be laid in the old clay canal instead. To prevent horses sinking too deeply, strong stakes are to be placed upright in the mud at short intervals, the tops sharply pointed, about a foot above the straw, forming a sort of chevaux-de-frise — thus a horse sinking to his knees will receive a gentle hint from beneath to " move on." The houses for deciding precedence on Dr. Faustus's tight-ropes are to be turned into hospitals for those injured by the chevaux-de-jrise ; each sufferer will pay a fee of £5, so that a handsome return is anticipated. The old ladies recently elected in the " Society for the Formation of Oabholes" are going on as might be expected. The escort continues to bring down from twenty-three grains to five pennyweights per trip, carefully guarded by fifty soldiers, under a captain and two lieutenants ; as the expense does nofc exceed £427,896 13s 4d per annum, the results are solid and satisfactory. The additions to the church of St. Julian the Apostate are completed, and redound infinitely to the credit and fame of the architect. It was intended to include 33 distinct styles of architecture, but unfortunately room could only be found for 29. The windows are filled in exquisite taste with orange glass, which when the sun shines, diffuses "auburn " locks to an alarming extent. The Rev. Mr. Solo's kirk is an equally beautiful structure, leaving the old-fashioned buildings of the home country far behind. In that sublime edifice, the Eev. gentleman improves the occasion to a delighted and breathles audience, who listen with rapt attention to discourses varying from four to five hours in length. Happy people and happy pastor ! Foaco.