Random Notes.

Southern Cross, Volume 2, Issue 2, 14 April 1894, Page 9

Random Notes.

Early this week we learned from the daily press that the local primary school teachers lately held a corroboree in town and discussed the proceeding's of the Colonial School Inspectrs’ korero, held a month or two ago in the Empire City. Resolutions seem to have fallen “ thick as autumnal leaves that strow the brooks in Yallombrosa,” and of these the majority, dealing, as they did, with passes, class subjects, syllabuses, and technical terms of that kind, are practically caviare to the general reader, and Vox consequently leaves these to “ his betters.” The Inspectors, however, and likewise those who teach the young idea, are dissatisfied with our British nondescript weights and measures ! No wonder! These fearful and wonderful things are a weariness to the flesh. We do not in the colonies suffer so very much from the hopeless confusion of irreconcilable standards as they do in the Old Country, but the introduction of a decimal s}' r stem would certainly lighten the labours of both teachers and commercial men. England, that happy land, “ where freedom broadens down from precedent to precedent,” has granted freedom amounting to license in the use of weights and measures. We all know that an English, an Irish, and a Scotch mile do not represent the same distance, while a nautical mile differs from all three. The man-of-war’s man does not mean the same depth of water as an English fisherman when speaking of a “ fathom ; ” what, too, is a stone ? In the weighing of a living man, or a sack of potatoes, fourteen pounds would be considered correct, but a dead bullock gives but eight pounds to the same weight. And so on—illustrations of the absurdities are practically endless. The confusion is only too apparent in examining the commercial and market columns of any of the great English dailies. But will our N.Z. inspectors and Southland teachers effect the reform ? I believe there exists in England a society whose object is the scientific improvement of our weights and measures, but like the spelling reform “ Assoshiashun,” the said society believes in making haste slowly. Still, seeing that New Zealand is the happy hunting ground for all new fads and fancies, it is quite within the range of possibility that our sapient rulers should give effect to the wishes of our “ educationalistic ” reformers.

On the other side of the Tasman Sea our brother colonists are very much exercised over a newly-dis-covered point in matrimonial law, not as laid down by our better-halves. In their case all that ever was to be discovered was discovered long years ago, and has since been steadily put into practice. The discovery has been made within the august precincts of the South Australian Supreme Court by no less eminent personages than the presiding justices therein. It has been discovered, as I hinted above, that if the doors of the church were closed the marriage, in consequence thereof, would be void. In the semi-tropical regions of South Australia one would almost suppose that not only doors, but windows and even chinks and crannies of every kind would be kept open to furnish the parboiled participants in the ceremony with air. It is also rather unusual for the fair one to seek to avoid the admiring and, perhaps, envious glances of her less successful fellows, whose market is still to be made! Here in Invercargill where we are not so favoured in the way of summer zephyrs as in the overgrown island beyond the western wave, w r e find little difficulty in leaving the church door open on these occasions. Hay, though a southerly buster may rave its loudest and influenza with its dire accompaniments threaten, yet would the majority of our young ladies when advancing to the hymeneal shrine not part with a single one from the crowd of spectators who, she hopes, will witness the performance in which she, as principal performer, promises to love, honour and obey (?) Vox.