OH! ELIZA!

Southern Cross, Volume 1, Issue 6, 6 May 1893, Page 12

OH! ELIZA!

The counsel prosecuting in a breach of promise case was 3’outhful and fresh, and delighted in showing himself off ; hut he didn’t know what a guy he was untie it fell on him with a dull and sickening thud.

The defendant had taken the stand. “ Yon say,” said the rising young counsel, after several impertinent questions, “ that you never made love to her ?” “Not to my knowledge,” replied the defendant. “ Never called her pet names either I suppose ?” “No, sir.” . ■ “ Now, as a matter of fact, didn’t you call her Lizzie after you had been to see her only three or four times, and always after that, when you know you should have called, her Miss Smith if you had not been seeking to win her young and trustful heart p” “No, sir, I did not.” The jflaintiff pulled the attorney’s sleeve, but he paid no attention to her. “ Ah, indeed,” very sarcastically. “ I presume you never called her Lizzie in your life P” “ I never did, sir.” The man of law sat forward with a sharp crack of the chair legs on the floor. ■ “ I’d like to know why yon never did, sir ?” he asked, w T ith- the air of a man who knew he had the facts. “ Because ” —and the witness was as cool as a palm-leaf fan could make him in June—“ because her name was Eliza.” Then it was that counsel heeded the plaintiff’s wild clutchings, and wanted to hit himself in the neck with a law book, but it was too late.