Thank you for correcting the text in this article. Your corrections improve Papers Past searches for everyone. See the latest corrections.

This article contains searchable text which was automatically generated and may contain errors. Join the community and correct any errors you spot to help us improve Papers Past.

Article image
Article image
Article image
Article image
Article image
Article image
Article image
Article image
Article image
Article image
Article image
Article image

BUILDING A HOUSE.

HOW IT IS DONE. HINTS FOE THE AMATEUR. (By Robert Magill). Of course, as my wife said when I mentioned it to her: “Why build a house;” And as I replied, very cleverly, I think: “Why not?” If you can get a uaper pattern and make a frock, or build a steak and kidney pie with two floors and solid foundations, why not build a house? Very well, then. Before you start i-oii draw up the whole thing on a plan, with squares for the rooms like a crossword puzzle without the black parts. Alt the distances from here to there are put in; and as it is going to ho ybur own house you can have it made to measure the same as a pair of trousers, only you should allow plenty of room in case it shrinks, in the rain. Houses are designed in several styles, such as the Gothic, the Ironic, the Tonic, and the Comic, and Half-timbered, the Half-and-half, .jind the Brick with a Dash. TOOLS AND MATERIALS.

Now, it’s of no use trying to do good wit non t proper tools. You want a good sharp pen-knife; a pencil and paper so that you can work out what you’re saving; a tack hammer; a coal shovel; a butter knife for the mortar and stuff; a saw to saw things with; a dustbin for the things you’ve sawn; an umbrella to put up in ease the top bricks fall off while you’re pushing the bottom bricks -straight again; a pair of tongs so that you can lift the bricks instead of spoiling your hands, and a strong pair of scissors to trim the edges. , Use the very best materials. Thick string, for instance, is better than the white stuff tlie grocer uses for tying up the currants. Don’t forget some tobacco, a deck chair, and an interestingbook to while away the time when you are thinking what to do next. Then you will want a lot of wood, a lot of glass, and probably a lot more glass. Glass breaks if you drop it. You will also require some slates, and plenty of bricks. Bricks are square lumps of earth of a convenient size for throwing at people, imade from plastic clay and baked till they form a hard mass. See that they are properly baked, or you may have to stop the house-building to-toast them both sides like a muffin. METHOD OF CONSTRUCTION. You have to buy the piece of land on which the house is to stand, and as vou can’t roll it' up like a piece of oilcloth and lay it out again somewhere pise, it is wisest to-see that it is in the right place to start with. It can be where, you like—or 'more likely, where you can afford it- —but a very nice place is next to some other house, so that your house will’ have something on which to lean. , ■ The first thing you do is to dig a large hole, the size your house is going to be. However, you must not think that you are going to plant a brick, and water it, and wait for a house to sprout. The idea of the hole is so that you can fill it with cement to make a foundation, otherwise the worms underground, who don’t know your house is therey will be nibbling their way into the sitting room by mistake. The next job is. to build the walls, bv slopping down some mortar, slapping a * brick on top, slopping some more mortar, than some more brick, and so on, slopping and slapping alternately. Don’t slap as hard as you slop, or the mortar will splash up into your eye. You need not take too much trouble over this until you come to the ground level, after which the results of your work will be visible to other people. There are several ways of laying bricks but the best way is end to end, like dominoes. Trim off the edges with the butter knife as you go along, and try not to lean on the thing. A house with a bulge in it always looks as though it wanted more exercise.

DOOES AND FLOOBS. When you’ve done a good stretch of Wall, make a corner by sticking another wall on to the first, and when you get four corners you will be delighted to find you’ve got a room. But you will be annoyed to find that you’ve built yourself inside it without remembering to make a doorway so that you can get out. It's too complicated for me to describe the way to make doorways, as you probably know nothing about it, and' besides, I know nothing about it either. Anyway, you can use the holes that will undoubtedly appear as time goes on. When the wall is high enough, you can stick the floor in, unless you are going to put poles across and go to roost at night like the birds. The floors are made of pieces of wood running crosswise. The top pieces rest on the bottom pieces, which are held up by being nailed on to the top pieces. The roof should be firmly fixed on with plenty of tacks, because if you’ve got a very loud-speaker it will one day lift it off. . . Seeing that it is your own house you can put all sorts of improvements in it, such as that extra stair you always try to step on in the dark and find'isn’t there.

Another improvement is a letter box that will open wide when it sees an envelope with a postal order in it, but which will 3imp at the postman’s fingers if he tries to push a bill into it. You might also have a revolving floor in the dining-room so that you can sit still and turn the table round instead of reaching for the mustard. I find I have no room ,to tell you

about the fireplaces and the but df you buy a good thick you won’t feel the cold so much. All you have to do now is to board and paint on, it ‘ ‘ The Cedas, ” or some such name, stick this on the front gate — then go and ask a house agent if he any flats to let,

Permanent link to this item
Hononga pūmau ki tēnei tūemi

https://paperspast.natlib.govt.nz/newspapers/SNEWS19270902.2.2

Bibliographic details
Ngā taipitopito pukapuka

Shannon News, 2 September 1927, Page 1

Word count
Tapeke kupu
1,058

BUILDING A HOUSE. Shannon News, 2 September 1927, Page 1

BUILDING A HOUSE. Shannon News, 2 September 1927, Page 1

Help

Log in or create a Papers Past website account

Use your Papers Past website account to correct newspaper text.

By creating and using this account you agree to our terms of use.

Log in with RealMe®

If you’ve used a RealMe login somewhere else, you can use it here too. If you don’t already have a username and password, just click Log in and you can choose to create one.


Log in again to continue your work

Your session has expired.

Log in again with RealMe®


Alert