NEWS OF THE DAY.

South Canterbury Times, Issue 2504, 30 March 1881, Page 2

NEWS OF THE DAY .

The following good joke in connection with the Ashburton Exhibition is told by the “ Guardian.” A country farmer was looking at some of the exhibits in the upper room of the Hall yesterday, and was told it was Malachite. “ Gracious me!” he exclaimed; “ I thought Malachite was one of the Prophets; how many changes take place in a few years.” Although it is early in the season, the unemployed are already beginning to make a noise. When the express from the South arrived at the railway station yesterday, a slight scene was occasioned. Two members of the unemployed, with huge swags on their shoulder jumped out of one carriage, and a Makikihi man jumped out of the carriage adjacent. An exciting dialogue was followed by the Makikihi man interviewing that genial referee in most disputes—Detective Kirby, The swaggers had dined, suppered, and slept under his hospitable roof, and then repaid his hospitality by tumbling their swags out of the window and making off with the “larks in the morning.” He had traced them and demanded payment in vain. One of the unemployed had no money and the other had changed a £2O cheque. The Makikihi man was anxious that they should be arrested, and the detective had some difficulty in explaining that board and lodging, however dishonestly acquired was not felony. This is the sort of thing that makes the roads of New Zealand so hard for working men, when they are searching for employment.

Mr J. M. Connor, the Timaru Champion walker, has been distinguishing himself in Melbourne, at the Hippodrome recently. A walking match for the Gatehouse (junr) champion belt took place. The distance was seven miles, and the competitors were M. Cann, of Geelong and J. M. O’Connor. After two miles had been accomplished the referees disqualified Cann for unfair walking, but he completed the match, the result being a dead heat. The time was 53m 40s.

In a town in South Canterbury which shall be nameless, a certain draper who is is noted for his barga ns, adopted recently the somewhat novel but ingenious plan of circulating samples of a cotton and woollen mixture, which he offered—in all shades —at ninepence per yard. Another bouse not to be out ione, got on the scent of the “ cheap line,” purchased from a certain house in Dunedin all that remained —a few pieces—and offered it in the same ingenious way as their rival at sixpence three-farthings. No sooner, however, had their samples begun to circulate than several customers presented an appearance at the counter and cleared out the “ cheap line,” to the delight of Mr Yardstick. The dismay and annoyance of Yardstick's employers may be imagined when they had to disappoint the numerous customers that responded to their envelopes, and ascertained that Mr Ninepence-a-yard had contrived to get the sixpence three-farthings material under his counter.