VARIETIES.

South Canterbury Times, Issue 2418, 16 December 1880, Page 3

VARIETIES.

—A Texas clergyman about to become chaplain of a penitential \, preached a farewell sermon to his congregation who had ill treated him, from theiollowing text : ‘ ’ I go to prepare a place for you, so that ivhcrc I am ye may he also. tells Us own talc. deaths?” asked the hospital physician while going his rounds. “ Nine.” “Why, I ordered medicine for ten.” “ Yes, but one wouldn't take it.” The famous Light Brigade at Balaklava was not a distinct and separate organization, but was made up of fragments of regiments, as follows.: — 118 men of the Fourth Light Dragoons ; JOI of tbe Eighth Hussars; 110 of the Eleventh Hussars ; B’>o of tlie Thirteenth Light Dragoons, and 140 of the Seventeenth Lancers —GOT men in all, of whom- 198 came out of the light

alive. A Journalistic Item: “Gilhooly is talking about starting a new paper in Galveston, and was telling a friend about it. “ You can borrow 850 and start a new' paper,” said the friend encouragingly. “ You darned fool ! if I could borrow SSO, what would I want to start a paper for? I want to start the paper so 1 can borrow' the SSO.” —“ Galveston News.” You. have heard of the lady attired in profound crape, who entered a car and abandoned herself to melancholy. A woman behind her, with red nose, green veil, and blue spectacles, leaned forward and inquired : I ; °st somebody?” A barely perceptible nod answered the question without milling another ; but the inquisition proceeded. “Father?” A shake. “Brother? A shako. “ Husband?” A nod. Church member?” A nod. “Life insured? A nod. “Then what are you moping about ? He’s all right and so arc 3 ou.