Page 4 Advertisements Column 4

South Canterbury Times, Issue 2356, 5 October 1880, Page 4

MAEK TWAIN’S EECIPE FOE GEEMAN COFFEE Take a barrel of water and bring it to a boil; rub a chicory-berry against a coffee-berry, then convey the former into the water. Continue the boiling and evaporation until the intensity of the flavor and aroma of the coffee and chicory has been diminished to a proper degree ; then set aside to cool. Now unharness the remains of a once cow from the plough, insert them in a hydraulic press, and, when you shall have acquired a teaspoonful of that pale-blue juice which a German superstition regards as milk, modify the malignity of its strength in a bucket of tepid water, and bring up the breakfast. Mix the beverage in a cold cup, partake with moderation, and keep a wet rag around your head to guard against over-excite-ment. Heard on the platform of a railway station. —“ Guard, why didn’t you wake me up as I asked you. Here I am miles beyond my station !” Guard: “ I did try, sir, but all I could get you to say was, ‘ All right, All right, Maria; get the children their breakfast, and I’ll be down in a minute !’ ”