A DISAPPOINTED JUROR.

South Canterbury Times, Issue 2141, 31 January 1880, Page 3

A DISAPPOINTED JUROR.

Ifc was a flushed and somewhat excited citizen who presented himscll beforeone of those judges of this city who were carefully voted out last "Wednesday, and remarked: —“If it please your Honor. I have been drawn as a juror for the coining term of your Court, and I have come to be excused. It is impossible for me to sit.” “Indeed,” said the judge, with some of that elephantine playfulness peculiar to the San Francisco bench. “ Haven’t a boil, have you ?” “ No, sir, I haveut,” replied the gentleman getting still warmer; but I haven’t the time. I am worn out with business, and want to go out into the country and fish.” “Fish, sir p Do you mean to say that you would prefer to sit for hours on a slippery log, getting }’Our nose peeled by the sun, rather than uphold law and order by the exercise of a freeman’s dearest prerogative ?” “ Yes I would.” “ You saddeu mo sir. Besides the fish ain’t biting worth a cent just now.” “ I don’t care if they ain’t. I know a place where they bite all the year round.” The Court carefully \ noted down, the spot for future Sunday reference, and then continued, “I regret the necessity, my dear sir, but I cannot excuse you.” “ I’m blasted if I serve,” shouted the victim, desperately. ‘Besides lomrac see, I had the smallpox recently, and I’m afraid I ain’t quite cured.” “Have you the leprosy ?” inquired his Honor, blandly lighting another cigar. “Of course pot.” Then there's no use talking. Small-pox don’t go. Nothing but leprosy will do —these times.” “ You insist on my serving, do you ?” said the citizen' looking very pale and determined. “Very well; now listen to me. I swear I won’t convict a single -criminal —not one. I’ll hang the jury or acquit every prisoner you try. Then when the country is flooded with burglars and murderers it will be your own fault.” “ M/y dear sir,” said his Honor, springing up and grasping the

'speakers'bandwitli e:n6! it■ n.“ If you are on tbe acquit;you are just the man I’ve been looking for. The relatives of one or two of the prisoners have been to see me, and well—ahem ! —you understand —I go out of office pretty soon —and of course, we must make hay while the sun shines, as it were. JN r ow, suppose you come up and dine with me to-night, and perhaps we can make some little mutual arrangement. Sec the point don’t you —eh ?—coin my dear sir, coin,” But the obstinate man went toff in a rage Tb buy ia revolver ; and the judge has since instructed the bailiff to have him on hand when the Court meets alive or dead. Some people have no sabe about a speculation at all, it, would seem.—Sau Francisco Weekly “ Post.”