NEAR AND FAR

Rotorua Morning Post, Volume 1, Issue 104, 23 December 1931, Page 4

NEAR AND FAR

Sampling T ome-Brew Home brew beer has lost much of its fascination for a group of Christchurch residents. One of the group spent a busy weelc-end making the beer "as pef*instruction," and when Jjhe time for hottling arrived, he invited some of his friends to help with the job. The beer,., had to be sampled, however, and when the bottom of the cask was reached the botLtles were still empty and the assistI ants were — well, not quite so empty! But the story has a sequel. The beer, like the apples inside the young lady named Hyde, fermented, and the unfortunate group were fol-ced to consult a doctor and spend several days in bed. Loud-Speaker Weddings Civil weddings to music are to be the order of the day in France if the example of the Mayor of St. Maurice, a suburb of Paris, is followed. He feels that the ordinary town hall ceremony is devoid of romance, de-

spite the tri-colour sash he wears about his waist. So he has decided that, - in future, civil marriages -will bo celebrated to -the accompaniment of a loud-speaking gramophone. One tune will be played when the happy couple arrive, another while the signing of the register is in progress, and another as they leave the building. Tombs Raided Belief that many years ago a burglar Rid his loot in a tomb and died without revealing his secret led to amazing desecration at Sneintoh churchyard, Nottingham, England, recently. Vandals destroyed six massive tombstones in search of the supposed treasure., and the sacrilege has aroused deep indignation. The stone monuments smashed were the largest in the churchyard, and the extent of the destruction shows that a gang of mefi worked at dead of night with i heavy tools. All the tombs were of

persons long-buried, some nearly 100 years ago. Slang In Court The aversion of Mr. E. D. Mosley, S.M., of Christchurch, to the use of slang in the court was illustrated recently. On several occasions. he pleaded ignorance of the meaning of expressions used by witnesses. "I was cleaning up the joint, and fonnd the bottles," said one defendant. "Joint?" ecboed Mr. Mosley. "Joint of beef, joint of meat, or what?" "The place, you know," amended defendant. The puzzled look left Mr. Mosley's face and gave place to a smile: Again, a little later, the. same defendant made another slip, but corrected himself just as Mr. Mosley was about to intervene. "I was caught in a pub under age," he said.

"I mean an hotel." A womah witness found the expfession, "nicking apples" conveyed nothing to the Bench. "Nicking?" repeated Mr. Mosley, several times. "Yes, stealing, you know," came the , explanation.

Caught Bending By 'Plane As Mr. William Blackwell, aged j 70, was stooping over the chrysan- J themums in his garden in Heston, Middlesex, an airplane came down on top of him. The machine, a Gipsy Moth, was piloted by Mr. Ralph Milbank, of White's Club, London, a pupil at Heston Airdrome. "I wasn't hurt, but I had the surprise of my lif e," Mr. Blackwell said afterwards. "I was tending my chrysanthemums, and taking no notice of airplanes. Suddenly I felt something on top of me. It was the wing of Mr. Milbank's machine. I guess I had a narrow shave tbat time." Goose's Unusual Family A somewhat unique and unusual spectacle was noticed on a recent morning in New Plymouth. A grey goose was proudly marching along the street with her family of six or 1 seven half-brown fowls, as if she was taking them for a walk in the park, i but when last noticed she diverted her course and walked though a near-by gate and into the baekyard. The goose and her "family" were evidently out for a holiday jaunt, probably having escaped from imprisonment. — Taranaki "Herald.'.' Unusual Identification An unusual means was employed to identify the badly decomposed and dismembered body of a man which was found in Wellington Harbour by the wharf police. The body was examined by Dr. Lynch, pathologist at the Wellington Hospital, who had an X-ray photograph taken of the

right leg and was able definitely to determine that the photographis plate was identical with a plate taken of a man who was in the hospital in 1928 with a broken leg. The man was George Thomas Hall, a watersider, aged about 45, who had been missing since July 26 last. Walked On the Cream! To illustrate the wonderfui riehness of the milk from the Turua district, the story is told of a f armer who complained to the factory manager that he was not receiving full value for his cream. "Why," said the farmer, "the cream is that thick you can walk on it." "Oh, come off!" said the managex*. "Well," replied the farmer, "the cat walked on it this morning!" Monkey Stows Away A small brown-faced old monkey, christened Jenny, for 10 days evaded capture on board the White Star liner Majestic. Where. Jenny came from is a mystery, but it is assumed that she stowed away from an oiler when the liner was being fuelled in New York. During the cruise and voyage home every effort was made to capture her. One morning she was caught stealing grapes from the captain's cabin. Hastily closing all doors and windows, an officer, protected in fencing mask and gauntlets, entered the cabin and pinioned the monkey after a lively struggle. In the course of the tussle Jenny bit through the gauntlet and the officer's finger.