LIFE IS UNCERTAIN.

Rangitikei Advocate and Manawatu Argus, Volume XXXIV, Issue 9465, 7 June 1909, Page 7

LIFE IS UNCERTAIN.

“No, I’m not going to commit soiolde because 1 have a broken nose,” said the man with the strips of court plaster across his nasal organ ; “but I’ll tell yon what I am going to do after this. I m not going to believe that there’s anything in luck any more. Things in this life are as uncertain as going out to milk a cow in the dark. Yon may find the cow or you may find yourself alongside of a mule. ‘ ‘ Somethingjnnst have happened. was queried. , , „ a “Yes: something has, and may be I'll feel better to get It off my mind. Six months ago a friend of mine was in Boston. He was walking along the street behind a lady when he noticed that one of her shoes was untied. He overtook her, and, raising his hat, informed her of the fact. She not only thanked him in the sweetest manner but also took his address; and what do you suppose followed?” ~ “She sent him a Teddy bear. “No; she d ? dn’t. She sent him a cheque for 20,000 dollars, and he s just gone into the shoe business.

“Well?” “Well, I was in New York last week, and I found myself following a lady in the street. I am just as good looking and courteous and ohivalric as my friend. A gust of wind took the lady’s hat off, and all her false hair with it. I overtook her, raised my hat, and expressed my sympathy that she was baldheaded. She took her property’from my hands, and then hauled off with the umbrella she carried, and broke my nose. No smiles—-no sweetness —no cheque for 30,000 dollars or any other oad amount. I was entitled to it just as much as my friend, and really more than he was, and yet he’s hustling in the shoe trade, while I am hanging around the country with a hroken nose; and the doctors say that I shall never be handsome again.”