GENERAL NEWS.

Rangitikei Advocate and Manawatu Argus, Volume XXXIV, Issue 9161, 2 June 1908, Page 6

GENERAL NEWS.

A Hibernian life-insurance agent was delegated to break the news to Casey’s He returned with much more cheerful face than was expected. “Did she bear up well, Terence?’’ Did ye break it gently?” bnre Idid,” replied Terence, “She k? re *LP h ne - I says, ‘Good morning, Mrs Casey. It’s good luck ye be after bavin’ this beautiful day.’ ‘ An’ what’s the good luck?’ says she. Ye’ve come - into a tidy sum of money,’ says I. ‘The saints bo praised !’ says she. ‘An’ where do tlie money be cornin’ from,Terence?’ ‘krom your husband’s life insurance, ’ says I. ‘Sure, be was kilt be the blashr. this mornin’ ’ ”

It is a natural instinct with all honeymoon couples to shun publicity. ‘ Now, Henry,” said one happy bride, “I want yon to understand distinctly that I do not wish to bo taken for a bride. lam going to act exactly as if I were an old married woman, and I insist that you behave just like all old married men do. She then retired to dress for an evening walk. Whe.n she came down, however, Henry was nowhere to be seen. She sought for him, weeping, for two hours. Then he returned with some new-found friends. He had been to a whist party, and he met his grief-stricken bride with the hilarious question, “Well, ain’t I doing the married man like a daisy?” She never referred to the subject agan, and everybody knew after that that they had just been married.

Dr. L. O. Halliburton, the noted English statistician, was discussing in Now York the statistics of marriage—marriage statistics are his speciality. ‘ ‘ The last statistics, ’’ be said, “show us one pleasant change, one grand improvement. Aged men of wealth are no longer marrying beautiful, mercenary young women, as frequently as they used. In fact, these marriages are becoming in this country so rare that the newspapers don’t hesitate to comment very forcibly upon them. I approve .oJT these cruel comments. They keep such mockeries of marriages down. ” Dr. Halibarton smiled grimly. “In a little town in Herts last month,” he said, “a millionaire of 79 mar* » young and pretty milliner of 22. The local paper printed the next; day this editorial paragraph on the matter: ‘Six months ago, when Mr Blank’s venerable wife died, his children and grandchildren feared that he would go crazy over“fche sad bereavement. Their fears have now come true. ’ ”

Ad amusing sequel to an application for a prohibition order occurred at the Port Chalmers Police Court on Saturday, when two Justices: of the Peace adjudicated upon a sister’s application against her brother. The case against the youth was most convincing (says the Otago Daily Times) but strenuous objection, to a prohibition order was made by his father, whose volubility resulted in his being ejected by the Court orderly. For a few minutes it looked as though the garrulous witness would he committed for contempt of Court, but a more cruel fate awaited him. There was a hurried consultation between Sergeant Mullany and the clerk of the Court, the rapid scratching of a pen upon official blue paper, followed by an unmistakably official footfall and a hesitating shuffle, and in less than five minutes the too vigorous witness had to stand upon his own defence, whilst the sergeant and two constables revealed his ordinate loveJJJof liquor extending back for a long time. Despite his vigorous protests to the contrary, the evidence against him was overwhelming, and almost before he realised the irony of it, the father found that his own name was placed on the prohibition list, the bench having severely rebuked him also for his lack of moral principle in corning before the Court to holster up a bad case. After realising that be had been hoist with his own petard, the victim of cruel circumstance was heard to remark that he would ‘ 1 appeal. ’ ’