TOMMY TO FRITZ.

Pukekohe & Waiuku Times, Volume 5, Issue 227, 17 November 1916, Page 2 (Supplement)

TOMMY TO FRITZ.

Old Frit*, you always n=ed to gas u lo About the stuff our newest troop ,were made of. A pack of funky hoys, you said, ant not The sort a fighting Hun need '> afraid of. But when it's " ("p and or.-r I" dowi our way 4 AnJ what you called our country "scum"' arises, I've noticed that you very seldom sta; To see us do our bay'nit exercises!

You blighters are ''invincible." yo bo ait; But 'to "adapt yourselves to nev conditions" Day after day we see your conquerini best Advancing to the rear to "new tiens." You swore that you were o-tt to co Verdun; j You did some fighting and a lot j| prating, But after all. it ain't polite, old sol To ask the world to lock—and keep ' waiting.

We quite admit you fight quite well for Huns; It's no kid's job to-day that lies be fore us, But now that we have got the shelf and guns To play our tune, we hope you lik the chorus. We have no blooming, swanky T.oast to make, But just one little tip we'd like t< offer; Just tell old Hindcnbur.for goodness sake, To keep his eagle eye on HaigTm J of fee! —TOTTHSTOXr. in the "Dai! Mail."

AN AWKWARD NAME. A visitor to a liospitaJ for* soldier was surprised to hear one of tne Da tiants being addressed l>v the nurse by his Christian name, it bein? custom aiy to address patient- by their sur names only. Upon inquiry as to wlr this distinction was accorded to th< particular soldier referred to, the "c

ply received was: •'Well, we can't very wjl! call hir bv his sur-name."

"Hut whv not:-" queried the soni€ what astonished visitor. "You was the overwhelmin; answer, " his surname is Love, and it lather awkward "

A 'mall hoy, rising four, had strut] his littlo sister's head with a toy. D bring home to him the enormity of hi effenee, r.nd to justify the severity ji the chastisement he had reoeiv it. the nurse npproachod him midst of his sulks and "Do you know that Wmi h your sister's he-id open'' Instantly the little lad's face bri <>ned. "Did TP" he exHauned. excafedlj "and what was insxlo it?"