If The Kaiser Ruled Us.

Pukekohe & Waiuku Times, Volume 5, Issue 201, 18 August 1916, Page 4 (Supplement)

If The Kaiser Ruled Us.

WHAT LIFE WOULD BE LIKE UNDER THE GERMANS.

BY FRANCIS GRIBBLE.

% Mr. Francis Gribole, the an- & it thor of tin's article is the fain- S;j & ous critic and novelist who was ■£ ;£ recently released after spend- % }t ing twelve months of the war K # r* a prisoner in the hands of s$ : |j c the Germans. On the outbreak y. 'it of war Mr. Gribblc was in Lux- .£ ¥f einiiiirg. He was arrested, and ig f interned in Kuhlebcn Camp in * !«: Germany, and is well qualified 3J # to speak of the way in which x § the Huns would handle us—if w 3C they got the chance. 3.. Now and again one hears a man say that he can't see what practical difference it would make if the Germans dio win tliis war and come over to England and took charge of things. Such chance as the Germans still have of beating and invading the country is due to the slackness which tnat sort of talk gives rise to. So let us put the question to ourselves 'n all seriousness. Suppoe they did win, suppose we had to surrender to them, how would our daily lives be affected by the change! J WAGES WOULD BE MUCH LOWER. The first thing whfch we may be quite sure about is that we should havo to pay more taxes. Not very long ago the German Chancellor of tb*. Ex, chequer, Horr Helfferich, tried to cheer the German people by saying so. This war. he told them, was costing a great deal of money, and the enemies of Germany would have to find that money. "For generations,"' he said, "they will have to drag an endless chain of debt in order to pay tribute to us."' And tribute means taxes. The second thing which we may be sure about r s that or trade would be knocked into a cocked hat. Loudly as some of us talk about the importance of capturing German trade, the Germans arc talking just as loudly about the importance of capturing British trde. And they know exactly how they would like to do it. They want concessions and monopolies; they want tariffs winch will favour German trade and handicap British trade, in both the homo and the foreign markets. And when trade declines :n an old and thickly-populated country like England, wages and salaries also fall. Strikes and trade unions could not possibly prevent them from falling. If there seemed to bo any chance ot their doing so, the Germans would break up the trade unions and shoot the strikers.

Higher taxes and lower wages —British workmen as badly off as, let us say, Spanish workmen —that would hethe first consequence of a German victory. But it would not be the last. Th? Germans are not only a people " on the make" at the expense of their enem ies; they are also an overbearing and interfering people who take an actual pleasure in making their subjects uncomfortable by vexatious and petty annoyances.

NO ONE'S HOME IS PRIVATE IN GERMANY.

The French of Alsace have always loathed them for that reason; so have tlio Poles of Poson; so have the Danes of Sehleswig; so have the blacks i i' Togoland, who lately held a public meeting and earned a vote of thanks to the Allies for turning them out ct the country. And so should we, even if their Government and their pol : ee treated us no worse thr.n they treat the average German belonging to the classes which have to do as they are lold. Observe the difference! A Bn'ton's house is his castle, but a German a house is always open to the police. At any hour of the day or night a policeman may not only knock at the door. but break it down if it is not ininiedi-

ate!y opened to him; and he oiten avals himself of this privilege on ridiculous pretexts and at inconvenient times. An English friend of mine who was recently teaching languages at Dui» burg told me that over and over again the police forced their way into hi; bedroom before he was awake, at seven o'clock in the morning, and insisted upon examining his papers. The last . : tme they came—about >: week before the war began—they marched him off to prison and p'ated him in solitary confinement. Ho had no chance of proving his innocence, because no charge was ever brought against him; be was merely arrested "on suspicion," though he does not Know to this hour of what he was susyeeted. That : s a favourte Gorman trick. The German police have in their pigeonholes long I'sts of '•suspicions'' persons denounced to them by spies, or in some cases, by the writers of anonymous letters not only in Germany, but in other countries also. I personally know men whose names were on those, lists in Metz and in Luxemburg. We may be quite sure tint slnvlar lists have been made out for 1/ondon, and for most of the other cities of Great Britain. The sort of people whose names are most likely to oe on the list are the Labour Leaders. The Germans who most closely correspond to our Labour Leaders pj'c the Social Democrats; and they are the objects of continual persecution. Once within a period of eignt months the German Government dissolved 222 working-men's unions and suppressed 127 working-men s newspapers.

ORDERED MASTERS TO FLOG CHILDREN. On another occasion the Karscr threatened to bring in a Bill whereby nny workman who tried to orgams% :i strike was to he punished with penal servitude. At the beg'nning ol this ww quite a numl>er of Social Democrats, including such eminent women ts Clara Zetkin and Rosa Luxemburg, were placed under lock and key; und they ar9 still under lock and key, though they have never been brought before a jury. That sort of tli'ng shows us what kind of liberty we should be likely to enjoy under Gorman rule; and our pos. it'on, of course, would be worse than that of persons of German nationality. We should be treated like the Pole* and the Danes and the Alsatians, so I may as well conclude tins little 'ketch by exp!a : ning as bristly as possible how these alien subjects of the Gorman Empire are accustomed to be bullied :

1. In Alsace there was a famous Zabern affair: a riot : n the course of which a Prussian lieutenant cut down a cripple with his sword, and then arrested the leading citizens, including the mayor, and kept them locked up ail night in the ceilar.

2. In Prussian Poland the Pruss'an military authorises ordered the schoolmasters to flog the school-children every day in order to compel them to say their prayers in the German language. 3. In Schleswig lectures in Danisii —which is the language of the people —on matters 'absolutely unconnected with politics, were forbidden by orders from Berlin. Such is a brief indication of the minor annoyances which German rule entails.

FIXES FOR DROPPING A PIECE 01PAPER.

When we consider that it would also mean for us compulsory military service, under German officers —very possibly against our trends of the United States—for the men, and a fine fo» the women every time tney shook a duster out of the window or dropped a scrap of paper <n the street, I think we shall he agreed in regarding that rule as a calamity not to nc pooh-poohed, but to be resisted bv all the means at our disposal.

booms slammed out in a trice under tho lusty compulsion of a host of stokers, ami the capstans and motors commenced to chatter in readiness to haul the nets forward. Lieutenants perched themselves precariously on tho kicking jumping, booms, and frantic-all,? waved little red and green Hags. A singb note rang out from the. bugle—-a half-sup-presesd cheer —and then a hasty yell — ■• 'Vast hearing starboard!'' The commander leaned over the starboard side of the forebridgo and demanded to know what, in the name of several pagan d : eties, the trouble was. •' S!/p caught, sir,'' replied the trembling officer of tho maintop. '•Them clear it, you blanked fool.' roared the autocrat, "we shall bo badly left in a minute."

1511 Sawyer, a veteran salt of some thirty-six summers, and no good conduct badges, slid along the net shelf to the sponson, and with a sledge-hammer purloined from the blacksmith's forge attacked the slip. Suddenyl there was a ruffling splash, a muffled yell, and a general chorus of "Heave round, starboard !" and Ike the ribs of an umbrella the booms of the nets slowly unfolded themselves from their resting places on the ship's side, and career madly forward under the coaxing of the foremost capstan. Only when they are lully out does anyone seem to remember Bill Sawyer, and not even then until his head bobs up from below the water and he grabs at the end of a boom. " Everybody inboard," yells the officer of tho maintop, then, William, "What in the name of thunder are you supposed to be doing? Come inboard at onco —coma inboard, sir!'' "This," said Bill to himself "comes o' boin' a flappin' 'and. Work like billy-ho, and then in the rattle tor .» cert. No more for me."

Ho slowly climbs inlward, and the officer proceeds to give hm a pungent description of what he niagines Bill's parentage to be, winding up with a forecast of Irs probable future iate, and the assertion that he "shall see the commander when drill is over," whereat Bill's heart falls more despondently than ever, Ihit is brought up into its usual place by the reiterated shout, IX NETS."

Fcjllows moijo spasm as the wen heave and heave a'gain—sweating and calling "Haul" together—on the chain brails which furl the nets, wlrle aft the. electric cap.statn hums, and in the waist the dozen motors and coal-crabs chatter and splutter as they assist with tho wire brails. And then, looking for all the world like a mammoth sansnge. the nets come, into v ; ew. One last heave, and they are on the shelf, and once more those ,whito-clad ants are busying themselves about the ships to secure them. Bill Sawyer, forgetful of Ins drenched eloth'ng and his coming troubles, is .is busy as any man there, his station oeing'on the shelf with the nets, and. of'tourse, it : s an understood fact that if even he were out of his station there would be a hitch and some part of the great drill machine would hang up. "" " Break!" vblls* the commander, and the whip-like pendant at the vardarm bursts forth in its glory of red. white and blue, showing the Fleet that although she was fifth at getting n?ts out "the Blusterer is the first to get them Th. Whereat the commander is happy, and orders " Carry on smoking till next exercise." Bill Sawyer makes his way forward, and tries to get below in order to sir. ft his soping rig. Slrp's police however, pounce on him lveforo he fairly reaches the foot of the ladder, and after taking liis name, drive him back to the upper deck, and to the evolution which has just been agnallcd. And nest day at eleven o clock BiMv stands before that self-same commander and tries to explain, first, why he Happened to be over the sde; secondly why ha attempted to skulk from his station at general drill. The commander listens with a sympathetic gnn. and finally bursting with laughter at the memo'rv of that red face spluttering over "the y'de among nets, chokes coughinglv, and dismisses the luckless one w'th a canton. But needless to say. had the Blusterer been "last ship" through Mr. Sawyer's involuntary stoppage over the side after the pendant broke, the commander would not have been so pleasant and poor Jfcllv's leave would have been stopped for a fortmsbt. So. !>ct.online to the humours of the gods are th' rewards of Tife aoDortioned.