MISCELLANEOUS.

Poverty Bay Standard, Volume I, Issue 143, 29 May 1884, Page 2

MISCELLANEOUS.

A London newspaper says it is probable that 1000 members and associates may cross the Atlantic to attend the Montreal meeting of the British Association for the advancement of science, in August. The postmaster at Chicago has received from Washington a packet of water-stained letters found in a mail bag picked up by an English fisherman in the North Sea, having been lost on the steamship Cimbria last January. A gentleman, who had boasted that his health and cheerful spirits were due to the fact that he bathed twice a day, was invited to a dinner-party. When the company had assembled, the lady of the house requested him to take a chair at the table next to that which had been selected for the minister of the parish. “ Ah,” observed one of the guests to the hostess, “ I see that you have an eye to the eternal fitness of things—cleanliness next to godliness An archaeologist, who was collecting the armorial bearings and other historical re* cords of the dignataries of the Church, came to Sydney Smith for his coat-of-arms. “ I have none,” said Smith, “ to show you.” “ What, none 1 No book-plate, no crest, no seal?” inquired the astonished collector. “ No, certainly not,” replied the witty Canon of St. Paul’s; “and shall I tell you why? Because the Smiths always stamped the wax of their letters with their right thumb.” “The idea of putting John on a jury!” exclaimed Mrs. Tompkins, when she heard that her husband had been drawn. “They might as well order a new trial right off. They won’t get John to agree on a verdict. He is the most obstinate man I ever saw. I never knew him to agree with his own wife in anything, and it isn’t at all likely he’s going to agree with people he doesn’t know anything about. A pretty juryman he is!” many of his neighbors, John Cockburt could “ tak’ a dram an’ be dune wi’t,” as he himself expressed it. On one occasion, ho never,, he committed the error of going beyond his usual limit, and, as he was reeling liome, he was met by Watty Greig, the parish beadle. Watty was, of course, greatly surprised to see John in a state of intoxication. “Man, Cockburn,” said he, with every sign of astonishment, “hoo has this hajipened? Ye’ve let it a’ gang tae yer heid the night.” John stared stupidly for a moment; then, with a might effect to steady himself, he stammered out, “ Ye’re wrang there, Watty, for a’m gey sure it’s a’ doon i’ ma legs!”