THE VILLIAGE POSTMASTER.

Poverty Bay Standard, Volume XI, Issue 1300, 24 March 1883, Page 4

THE VILLIAGE POSTMASTER.

The following humorous sketch, taken from a London comic paper, is faithfully indicative of the multifarious and multitudinous duties of a vintage grocer in the Old Country who has the good fortune to occupy the honourable ana lucrative position or one of Her Majesty’s postmasters:— Scene —A country Post Office. Ths Village Postmaster and Grocer (salary (£7 per annum) discovered leaving several good oust omers to first attend (as he is bound by hie bargain with the Post Office authorities to do) to the public want of Master Tommy Scroggins. Villiage P.M. (briskly): Now, Tommy, my boy, what is it 7 Tommy (deliberately): Oh, if you please, sir, 1 want a halfpenny stamp, and will you please stick him on, mother says, and write the direction, and father wants ablanktcllygraft foi m, and he says will you please tell him the address of the 44th Fut is, and send him a blank ekeddle for enlisting brother Bill in the Ryle Grinideere, and sister Mary Hann she wants a paper for payin’ iu a shilling's worth of stamps to 'er savings bank account, and an antelope addressed to the Fostmaster Gineral. An’ oh, please, sir, mother’s full of insuring old granny s life, if you'd be so kind as to send her all the hinfonnation ; and please what’s that she’s heard about being able to invest in Government stocks, as she'd like to have all pertiklers 7 Which I was forgettin' that Uncle Ben e gain’ to call for his dog license at two o’clock, if you'll have 'un ready ; and that I hare to take back a Poet Office order for one and fourpence, payable to Aunt Rebecca at Curry Rively, near Wurzleton, and two penny farthing reply post-cards ; and will you be so good as to cash this postal note, and give me money for this fivepenny stamp, and tell sister Jane if there's any letters left for Miss Hay Bee ; and father says is thie where you get the gun license j ami please when can grandfer git his pension from t»o 198th Ryle Fut ; and will you weigh this box o' garden seeds, and let me know the stamp for ’uu and give me change for half a suvrin, and [Tommy left gasping for breath, whilst the village postmaster, seizing a blank form, commences to write his resignation to the head office at St. Martin's-le-Grand. I