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Poverty Bay Standard, Volume X, Issue 1165, 3 October 1882, Page 2

It is always a satisfaction to know that there is somebody else as badly off for anything as you u.re yourself. Reuter's agent in London must be as badly off as the reporters in Poverty Bay for news. After no doubt expending a vast amount of time and those hours generally devoted to sleep, he cables “ There was a brilliant Aurora Boreal is visible last night.” We have heard of the girl, and for that matter have seen her; but we have a little comet fooling around here which could knock seven saucepans off Miss Aurora, and yet we don’t telegraph to the old Country about it.

Tonal—“ Whar'll ye hae been till, Tugal?” Tigal—“At ta M*Tav!sW funeral—” Tonal—“ An’ is ta Tavish deed ?” Tug al—“ Deed is he!” Tonal—“Losh, mon! Fowk are aye deein’ noo that never used to dee afore.” —One thing, however, never dies Garrett Bros’, fame as the champion sellers of Boots and Shoes.—(Advt).

Mr R. Craill advertises that he has lost a bay mare, and offers a reward of twenty shillings to any person who will return the same to him at Patutahi.

Two French Officers have arrived at Friume to take delivery of the 160 torpedoes manufactured there to the order of the French Government.

A French Engineer proposes to widen and deepen the river Seine so as to allow vessels of 23 feet draught to go up to Paris.

The Government sent out to Egypt troopships without troops, marines without ammunition, artillery without horses, but the Postmaster-General directed Major Sturgeon to take out w’ith him every requisite for distributing information ami receiving deposits in the “ British Army Post Office Savings Bank 111"

Mr. A. Peters, lately from Napier, has succeeded to the proprietorship of the Kaiteratahi Hotel, and is sparing no in making the premises not only attractive, but thoroughly comfortable. In a very little time it will be impossible to recognise the old house in consequence of the improvements both externally and internally. Separate and prix ate apartments have been set aside for families, and as the distance is not great, and the drive a most pleasant one, we feel assured that during the summer months Mr Peters will have no lack of custom.

The first meeting of the newly appointed Harbor Board was to have been held at 4 p.m. to-day. but in consequence of there not being a quorum present is adjourned until 7 p.m. October the 6th.

We are pleased to learn that Mr A. R. Wyllie who met with an accident on Sunday last, is making rapid recovery. Ais constitution being of the best, the fall he received has not affected him so much as it might have done a man of less powerful frame.

The “ London Times” of July 10th, com bating a statement made by a Mr Jeffray, that Victorian enterprise has had large influence in the development of squatting, sugar giowing, &c., in Riverinaand Queensland, and has thus aided their prosperity, said:—“lf Victoria has given help to New South Wales, it is partly because Victoria had the first start, and was a prosperous settlement before New South Wales had come into existence.” In spite of Sir Henry Parkes, a Trickett, and a Spofforth, it is evident (says a contemporary) that the history of Australia requires some study in high literary quarters.

The committee meeting of Mr A. McDonald’s supporters took place last nighs at the Masonic Hotel, to make arrangements for the dinner which is shortly to be given to “our member.” Tenders were received for catering and for printing. In the former Mr Erskine was successful, ami in the latter the “Herald” office. The affair promises to be an immense success.

i Messrs Croll and Ingle have, in addition to their ironmongery establishment, added a i leather grindery department. Our local j bootmakers will have now no reason to send • away for material as this firm can supply the requirements of the trade. The quality of : their first consignment cannot be disputed, i and we congratulate Messrs Croll and Ingle I upon their venture.

There is a practice very prevalent at present, which is the bespattering of gentlemen’s pleasure boats with mud and filth. We have in our possession the names of a few of these youthful scamps, and their parents can rest assured we shall not, for a moment, hesitate to supply them to the police, who we understand, by the courteous consideration of Sergeut Bullen, intend to keep a sharp Isok-out for these juvenile larrikins.

An extraordinary gastronomical feat has been performed at Derby. A man, out of ; sheer bravado, while in a public-house, cut ' up his fur cap and swallowed the pieces, then he ate a newspaper, and as a reward asked the company for a few coppers. Five pennies were accordingly thrown him, and on the suggestion of one of the company, these were sent after the newspaper and £ur cap. The silly fellow suddenly became ill and was taken to the infirmary. Guiteau’a body has been boilod at the Medical Museum, Washington, for the purpose of removing all the flush. The skeleton will be set up in the Museum. We are informed (says the Wairoa Guardian) that a young salmon measuring about i 7 inches in length, was captured in this river • near the ferry, the other morning ; the fish . was returned again to its native element. The Wanganui City Rifles have taken as their motto the phrase “ Second to None.” • an exhibition of modesty for which they arc , mildly “ chuffed ” by the local papers. We (Wairoa Gun dian) learn that the , maize crop grown in this district last year, and nov. being exported, niil reach 2,59 H n.-.ciiß, it only amou.-ited t<» j about 2,00 i),

The Hon. Ivo Bligh’s cricket team and the I Australians now in London were expected I to leave England by the same steamer. The | movements of the Australian Eleven after ! their return have been definitely determined, i Three matches are to be played, and in each j the Eleven will confront the new English ream. The. members will virtually disband ; —playing with their respective clubs or or colonies; but in Adelaide, Melbourne, aud Sydney they will unite as the existing Australian Eleven.

Fresh fish have been latterly particularly ‘ scarce, and a great many outcries made ; about the inertness of our local fishermen, i This morning, however, the market was i somewhat overstocked, and three vendors of | the scaly tribe were busily engaged in dis- j posing of the contents of thsir barrows, i Hapuka and tara-kihi were the principal ; features in these uniycles and although the ■ prices asked were somewhat exorbitant, there i were very many purchasers.

It is on the tapis that a public spelling competition will shortly take place, the contestants being—one, a “big gun,:’ and the other a “canvas spoiler.” As both are known to possess considerable talent in orthography, a very close wrestle may be expected.

An English paper says :—Although emigration to New Zealand is almost at a standstill, it continues on an enormous scale to America, upwards of 7.000 sonls sailing from the Mersey alone every week. The other day the Inman liner, City of Rome, left with no fewer than 2.000 on board, including 300 Jewish refugees. This is the largest number of emigrants ever carried by a single vessel.

Notwithstanding that our “ Somnolent Reporter ” had an injection of morphia, 4 grains of laudanum, 3 pipes filled with opium (and smoked out), an unknown quantity of beer and other beverages of a similar soporific nature, he could not get to sleep. He hopes, however, by becoming a strict tetotaller very shortly to get into dreamland once again.

The “ Arrow Observer ” reports that Mr D. O’Fee, farmer, of Crown Terrace, has threshed a stack of Tartarian oats, with the extraordinary return of 150 bushels to the acre—the yield being verified by actual weight. No wonder our contemporary declares this to be “ the finest yield of grain we have ever heard of.