SOME NEW GEOGRAPHY.

Poverty Bay Standard, Volume X, Issue 1129, 24 August 1882, Page 4

SOME NEW GEOGRAPHY.

Of what is the surface of the earth j composed ? Of comer lots, mighty poor roads, railroad tracks, base-ball grounds, cricket fields and skating rinks. What portion of the globe is water r About three-fourths. Sometimes they add a little gin and nutmeg to it. What is a town ? A city is an incorporated town, with a mayor who believes that the whole world shakes when he happens to fall flat on a cross-walk. What is commerce ? Borrowing 5 dols for a day or two and dodging the lender for a year or two. Name the different races? Horse race, boat race, bicycle race, and racing round to find a man to endorse your note. Into how many classes is mankind divided ? Six: being enlightened, civilised, half-civilised, savage, too utter, not-worth-a-cent and Indian agents. What nations are called enlightened? Those which have had the most wars, the worst laws, and produced the worst criminals. How' many motions has the earth ? That’s according to how you mix your drinks and which way you go homeWhat is the earth’s axis ? The lines passing between New York and Chicago. What causes day and night ? Day is caused by night getting tired out. Night is caused by everybody taking the ftreet car and going to supper. What is a map ? A map is a drawing to show the jury where Smith stood when Jones gave him a lift under the eye. What is a mariner’s compass ? A jug holding four gallons. —“ Detroit Tree Press.”