LEAF FROM THE CZAR’S DIARY
Got up at 7 a.m., and ordered my bath. Found four gallons of vitriol in it and did not take it. Went to breakfast. The Nihilists had placed two torpedoes on the stairs, but I did not step on them. The coffee smelled so strongly of prussic acid that I was afraid to cirink it. Found a scorpion in my left slipper, but fortunately shook it out before putting it on. Just before stepping into the carriage to go for my morning drive, it was blown into the air, killing the coachman and the horses instantly. Took a light lunch of hermetically-sealed American canned goods. They _ can’t fool me there. Found a poisoned dagger in my favorite chair, with the point sticking out. Did not sit down on it. Had dinner at 6 p.m., and made Baron Laischounowonski taste every dish. He died before the soup was cleared away. Consumed some Baltimore oysters and some London stout that I have had locked up for five years. Went to the theatre and was shot at three times in the first act. Had the entire audience hanged. Went home to bed, and slept all night on the roof of the palace.
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https://paperspast.natlib.govt.nz/newspapers/PBS18820729.2.21
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Poverty Bay Standard, Volume X, Issue 1109, 29 July 1882, Page 4
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204LEAF FROM THE CZAR’S DIARY Poverty Bay Standard, Volume X, Issue 1109, 29 July 1882, Page 4
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