FORGIVEN, BUT KOT FORGOTTEN

Poverty Bay Standard, Volume II, Issue 206, 19 September 1874, Page 2

FORGIVEN, BUT KOT FORGOTTEN

If thou wouklst wake one fond regret For buried hopes and wasted years, First teach this sad heart, to forget A love that left it naught but tears.

If thou wouldst ever be again To me the brightest star in heaven, First teach me to forget the nain Thy broken promises have given.

If thou wouldst wake again that chord That echoed in the long ago, First teach me to forget the word That turned the gathering mists to snow.

The sleeper, wakened from his dream, Can never catch the broken strain ; The dreamer, wakened, as ’twould seem, Drcams on, nor cares to sleep again.

Thus I forgive the bitter past, And weave a day-dream bright and free, And when I calmly sleep at last, Then I’d forget and dream of thee. S. J. M.

HOW TO COOK A HUSBAND.

As Mrs. Glass said of the hare, “You must first catch the creature.” Then, as many a husband is spoiled in cooking, if you wish to make a good dish of him, attend to the following remarks : Some women go abont as if t heir lords were bladders, and blow them up. Others keep them constantly in hot water while others again freeze them by conjugal coldness. Some smother (hem in hatred contention, and variance; and some keep them in pickle all thyir lives. These women always serve them with tongue sauce. Now, it cann © be supposed that husbands will be tender and good, managed in this way ; but they are, on the contrary, quite delicious when well preserved.

In order to do this after the most approved manner, first get a jar, called the jar of carefulness (which, by-tho-by, all good wives have on hand.) Being placed in it, set him near the fire of conjugal love ; let the fire be pretty

hot, but especially let it be clear. Above all, let it be regular and constant. Cover him well over with equal quantities of affection, kindness, and subjection. Keep plenty of these by you, and be very attentive to supply the place of any that may waste by evajxiration or any other cause. Garnish with muuest, becoming familiarity, and innocent pleasantry; and if you add kisses or other confectioneries, accompany them with a sufficient portion of secrecy; and it would not be amiss to add a little prudence and moderation. We would advise all gude-wives to try this recipe, and realise how admirable a dish a husband is when properly cooked and garnished.

N.B.— lhe same advice to husbands; a wife “ properly cooked and garnished ” is equally delicious.

Epitaph for a Cannibal. — “Ono who loved his fellow-man.” A Barren Bock. —When the cradled baby refuses to go to sleep.

Amended Proverb —for the season (by a Bolgravian Dowager).—Marriages are made in—London. — Punch. When does a man contrive to move in a very small space?—When he comes downstairs in his slippers. Own of the saddest things about human nature is, that a man may guide others in the path of life without walking in it himself —that he may be a pilot, and yet a castaway.

A country boy, having heard of sailors heaving anchors, wanted to know if it was sea-sickness that made them do it.

Some singers at a concert were somewhat startled the other evening by finding that the selection, “When wearied wretches sink Io sleep,” had been printed on the programmes, “ When, married wretches,” etc.

Th l ? Thames Evening Star says:—“lt is rumored that an arrangement has been come to in the ’political world, by which Charles O'Neill, Esq., will resign his position as Thames memb?r in the General Asscmb'y, :md i hat James Mackay, Esq., will bland for election te the seat.”

A Tokomairiro fanner, brought up near London, Canada West, states te the B ‘'ce Herald that the ashes of the mapu, manuka, kauri, black pine, and other woods, are worth Is 6d a bag to farmers complaining of sorrel, sour soil, stiff clays, &c., besides giving farmers’ wives the means of making plenty of soft soap.

We (Thames Star) learn that Mr. Andrew Beveridge has received a commission from (ho Grand Lo of Scotland, appointing him R.W.P.G. Master for the North Island, and that, the Provincial Grand Lodge will be constituted as soon as Mr. Beveridge's health will permit him te assume Lhe duties of his high office. [The Auckland obituary has, since Ihe receipt of the above, announced the death of the worthy Brother.—Ed S.]