Chubb 's Idea of Music
Chubb has not much of an ear for music, but he spent a considerable sum in having his daughter taught how to hammer a piano; and he is proud of her accomplishments. He was talking with a neighbour over the fence the other day, when a series of dreadful sounds came from his piano through the open parlour window. Presently Chubb remarked 1 : "D'yo hear that? Just listen to it, will you? That's what I call music." Then there were a few additional bangs on the instrument, a flourish or two, and then more discordant thumping. "Splendid, isn't it?" said Chubb. "Mary Jane's bustin' the music right out of that machine, you observe. Them's the Strauss waltzes, I believe, she's raslin' with now. Just listen." The neighbour remarked that, from the energy displayed, Mary Jane, at least, seemed to be really in earnest, but whether she was treating Mr Strauss exactly right was an open question. "I don't know nothin* about music," observed Chubb, '"but I can tell the real thing when I hear it ; and I kin sit and hear Mary Jane play waltzes and 'The Maiden's Prayer' until it makes me cry like a child." The other asserted that if she played those compositions as she was doing now it would make anybody cry. A deaf-mute would shed tears. "Listen to that now, will you?" exclaimed Ohubb, as a wild tumult of sound came from the parlour. "Isn't it splendid? If I didn't know it was Mary Jane a-tearm' round them waltzes. I'd think it was one of the fellers who play at the concerts. Lot's go over and hear her."
They both entered the house. Mary Jane was nowhere to be seenj but, to the infinite disgust of Chubb, there was a redhaired man, with a fist as big as a loaf of bioad, tuning the piano. Chubb requested his neighbour not to tell anybody, and he said ho would nox. It is related here in confidence, and it must go no further.
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Otago Witness, Issue 2814, 19 February 1908, Page 91
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341Chubb's Idea of Music Otago Witness, Issue 2814, 19 February 1908, Page 91
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