SCHOOLBOY HOWLERS

Opotiki News, Volume II, Issue 158, 15 March 1939, Page 1

SCHOOLBOY HOWLERS

The following schoolboy howlers have been culled from a teacher’s scrap-book:— ■Cupid is a gentleman fairy. The king’s bounty is Mutiny. Handel’s Largo is a iorin ail. A golfer’s tee is ham and bacen. A public convenience is the dole. An alibi is a lie which crooks tell. A coupe is a coif what- the baby gets. An appendix is a man learning a trade. A grass widow i.s a snake without a father. The Duee is what comes out of lemons. A 3-piece suit is a coat weskit and pance. A Schoolboy Howler is the master’s cane. The Royal mews are the King’s cats and kittens. Colonel Bogey is what mothers friten you with.An umpire is a mail who does nothing in a match. . A crooner is a singer that can’t get the high notes. Foot and mouth disease is chilhlanes and toothache. ■ A conductor’s baton is the thing he ticks his tickets with. - A steeplejack is a jockey that rides in the grand nationel. An undertaker i.s a lady who is in' the under wear departmen. Grace before meat, means never put your elbows on the table. Sun Ray is for when you swallow a half penny they see where it is. Spiritualists are -people who think there is somebody who is walking alound. A military tattoo is a picture that man gets put on his arm when he joins the army.