TIDES

Opotiki News, Volume I, Issue 12, 18 March 1938, Page 4

TIDES

• - /GENEROSITY? ■ ~'■■■ ' ■ -- . . ■ . The old miser was nearing Iris endt.; and was dictating his last wail ami ° ■.#. ..... testament. . /#■'.. ,#r ~y •••; “And to each of my employees who . has been with me five years or ui&ty,. ■ I bequeath the sum of two, . thoaisa^^/ “That’s very generous,” said she, lawyer, in admiration. •- “Not at all,” said the sick, man, “There’s not one o.f them who has been with me for more than a year, but it will look well in the papers.” MAKING SURE p': ■ Harry Simpson, a negro labourer, was* putting in his first day with a construction gang under a foreman who was known for getting the maximum amount of labour out of hiA men. Simpson was helping in the task of moving the right-of-way, and all day long he carried heavy timbers until at the close of the day he was ’completely worn out. Just before he left, he approached fho boss and said: “Mister, you sure you got me down on the- pay-roll?” The foreman looked over the list of names. “Yes,” lie said finally, “here you are: ‘Simpson, Harry Simpson.’ That’s right, isn’t it ?” . “Yass, sub, boss,” said the negro, “that’s right. I thought mebbe you had me down as Samson.” f A DIFFICULT CHOICE After the vicar had read the banns for the first time he was approached by the prospective bridssgroom, who wanted •to know whether they could be changed. The vicar replied: Certainly, you are not married yet, or legally bound in any way. The prospective bridegroom, some- * what relieved: I wanted to know that. It seems t ; oi me, now that I’ve been thinking, that I would prefer her sister. The Vicar: Of course, fresh banns will have to be published. The Prospective Bridegroom : Does that mean I shall have to pay another half-crown ? The Vicar; Of course. The Prospective Bridegroom : Perhaps you had better leave it as it is.

HEGH WATER AT 0P0TIKI :u;arch Date a.m. 13.111. 1 ... ... 6.20 6.40 2 ... ... 7.06 7.25 3 ... 7.46 8.08 4 ... ... 8.26 ■ 8.48 5 ... .... 9.08 9.27 1 6 .... ... 9.49 10.02 7 ... 10.34 10.56 8 ... ... 11.16 11.30 9 ... .... 11.45 12.07 10- ... .... 12.35 12.59 11 ... ... 1.30 1.56 12 ... .... 2.30 3.01 13 ... ... 3.36 4.10 14 >.< ... 4.44 5.16 15 ... 5.45 6.IS 16 ... ... 6.42 . 7.11 17 ... ... 7.33 • , 8.00 18 ... ... 8.20 8.46 19 ,.. ... 9.04 ' 9.30 20 ... ... 9.46 10.14 21' ... ... 10.29 10.58 22 ... 11.10 11.30 23 ... ... 11.40 11..55 24 ... ... 12.25 12.39 25 ... ... 1.10 1.26 26 ... ... 1.59 1 2.15 27 ... 2.50 ' 3.10 28 ... 3.4-5 4.OS 29 ... ... ' 4.445.07 30 ... ... o!36 6.04 31 ... ... 5.29 6.54