THE COMMON ROUND

Otago Daily Times, Issue 24418, 2 October 1940, Page 2

THE COMMON ROUND

By Wayfarer

Into a war which we are told is to preserve freedom and democracy Mr Nash introduces an incongruous note with the provisions surrounding his non-compulsive compulsory war purposes loan. Those who desire to lend a sum equivalent to income tax payments, less certain deductions, are entitled to do so. Those who do not, desire to lend are equally and even irresistibly so privileged. At least it must be recognised that this upholds the fine old democratic principle of equal rights for all.

But those who do not, or cannot, or will not lend without being made to have an additional inducement offered to them—publication in the Gazette of their names and the amounts that they are expected to subscribe. As has been politely pointed out in the more learned columns of this news-sheet, this procedure might reasonably be described as blackmail, and constitutes, besides, an infraction of that cherished tradition cf the Income Tax Department, that the earnings of valued clients should in no manner or sense be divulged to the public. Obviously those members of the public gifted with sufficient of mathematical genius to have passed the sixth standard can quite simoly satisfy their curiosity concerning other people’s incomes, given the amount they pay in income tax.

One of our ancient liberties as Britons was that of being locked in the stocks from sun-up to sundown for misdemeanours, when those so minded could gather round to jeer at the captive, and, if they were of a crudely playful disposition, throw cabbages at him. This is one of the blessings of democracy which—for good and sufficient reason, as we will all agree—has been withdrawn. It has remained for the New Zealand Government to reintroduce the fine old system of pillorying those of whom it disapproves and pillorying them more subtly than our rude forefathers dreamed of. Incidentally, as we understand it, those who spent the requisite time in the stocks were, when released, free of the law, being deemed sufficiently chastened. But those who are pilloried in the Gazette emerge from their ignominy with their obligation to subscribe to the non-compulsory loan still to be discharged. For this ingenious contribution to the democratic concepts of justice, crime, and punishment, a cabbage for Mr Nash. We tremble to think what may happen if anybody tells him about such good oldfashioned refinements as the duck-ing-stool and the iron jacket.

From a report of the epoch-mak-ing deliberations of Balclutha’s civic papas we extract a portentous statement:

The traffic inspector, in his report, said he objected to having to pay for a pair of trousers as part of his uniform. If council paid for this pair he would be willing to pay for the next pair.—It was agreed to- pay for the whole of the uniform.

Thus, by prompt tand generous decision, can problems which have every prospect of developing into a public scandal be neatly and decently resolved. Reason has prevailed in South Otago. Justice is confirmed in enthronement in the seats of the mighty, even extended to the seat of the powerful minion whose control over the chariots of Jehu none may question.

It is a fair interpretation of English law and of the Shakespearian convention that when man is dressed in a little brief authority it should not be made too brief to permit of his discharging his duties on the public highways and byways without embarrassment. We approve the resolution with which the Balclutha Borough has measured up to this crisis. There was, of course, an alternative solution which, in a province nurtured in the traditions : of Scotland, would have been equally proper. But possibly a kilted traffic officer would be less efficient in his. professional activities than a trousered one. There might be a disposition, so to speak, to get the, wind up when' speedsters demanded hot pursuit. A kilted mayor for Kaitangata is well enough, but a kilted "cop in Balclutha is, perhaps, out of character in a community: which in mind if not yet in the material , sense has developed a metropolitan consciousness.

From the north, duly authenticated by our military correspondent, comes a story concerning the trials of soldiering in our democratic army:

The Parade Ground at [deleted by censor the name of a military camp not a hundred miles from the seat of Government] is ground sacrosanct, dedicated to the smart manoeuvrings and turnabouts of the troops upon military Occasions. No non-ccmmis-sioned officer durst tread its brown swath, no once-pipped officer would venture on it except upon the most lawful busii.ess and no private would dream of defiling it even with a glance in passing. Yet recently the O.C. happened to be about, taking the air, when his horrified glance fell upon a bowed figure shuffling across this sacred ground. When he could bring himself to look more closely, he perceived that this unmilitary figure was that of the cook, bent with so sordid a burden as a sack of potatoes—insult upon injury. Stepping smartly after the defiler of his proud preserve, the O.C. addressed the varlet in emphatic terms. Horror lent eloquence to his speech, as he outlined the heinousness of this offence to the Parade Ground, and his voice shook with emotion and the rapid discharge of highlyexplosive words. The cook slouched on, apparently indifferent to the barrage, and muttered something as he went. “ What’s that? ” shouted the O.C. “ Did you say * 0.K.. sir ’? ” “No.” came the reply in muffled tones from beneath the sack of potatoes, “I said, ‘Go to hell!’”

By way of recreation we print a scoreboard compiled by an English newspaper and sent on from a Central Otago correspondent: GERMANY v. THE REST P. O. Land, c. Stalin, b. Hitler 10 C. Slovakia, c, and b. Hitler 0 A. U. Stria, run out .. .. 0 D. Enmark, run out .. .. 0 N. Orway, c. Quisling, b. Hitler 62 H. Olland, retired hurt .... 3 B. Elgium, st. Leopold, b. Hitler .. 17 F. R. Ance, c. Mussolini, b. Hitler 294 G. T. Britain, not out .. .. 331 D. O. Minions, not out ~ .. 331 A. Merica, to bat Tea interval (8 wickets) 1,048 Umpires: S. Talin and S. Oviet. Stop Press: Musso bowling from Gasworks end. This seems a fair enough summary, except for one thing—we are definitely under the impression that whatever game Hit and Muss are playing, it isn’t cricket. “Experienced man seeks position as machinist, saw doctor.” Well, what did the doctor say?