LADIES' COLUMN.

Oamaru Mail, Volume IV, Issue 1033, 12 August 1879, Page 3 (Supplement)

LADIES' COLUMN.

TIM BUNKER OH BftLSTGIXG UP GIRLS. 7, .. ■ ' (The Farmer.) Me. Editor,—For a long' time T have been thinking about the way girls are brought up in tlii3 country. • Indeed, I havc'liad considerable many ideas on th;it subject ever since our Sally was born, .and the matter has been brewing,. as Mrs.. Bunker says of lier beer, for well-nigh twenty years. Last winter I got some more ideas, and I am' now so' full upon this topic, that I shall boil over' unless I dip, out a little into your paper: '. I coiint a well-grown,| well-behaved, and well-educated woman, as the. very blossom of creation. She was'the last made—reserved for the last because best. ' As there is nothing so good and beautiful in. the world'as a good woman', 'so there is nothing so bad as a spoiled woman?; And now I am sorry to say that very many girls:are: utterly spoiled. They are not well- balanced' and well adapted to the.work that woman has to do.. The most are brought up with such notions that they go through life discontented and unhappy. There is Doctor Smith's daughter Eliza —<-a fair sample of the kind of bringing up I mean. They are very good, people over there, but.h thiiy -seem to ; forget ; that children have got .to grow.lip, .and. can't , be playthings, for,..ever. ..They, did, not teach her to do Anything when she was a

little girl.' She pretended to go to school, but it Was Only-when she took'a notion to go. There was no'habit of study fixed, and so she c;ot discouraged, and disgusted with all kinds <>£ books that required any thinking. Sho had as little discipline of body as of mind, eould not sew well, did not know hpw to rii'ake upa bed, t>r to darn a -'Micking, cnnla iiot broil-a fish-or boil a. 'iiiuolcliiiet.; Somehow, her mother seemed, tfi chests every-dav matters were not ..jvortJi;:atu'iuUttg,.to. ■ She'said she was going tq iwiko a lady of Eliza, and marry Hov oil' to fi'.mt! rich man,.'who would .not want a'wii\! ( thaf know how to work. Sho \tais to ha've her " lairn- the ornamentals. ' as she called them—music, painting embroidery, dancing, and such Like. Sally used to say that she did not know enough about the lessons to last her over night, when she left school, and I do not think sue has learned much more about the common branches since. She was sent oft' : to' a fashionable boarding scho.ol, when she was fifteen, where they do nothing but- put t he.polish on to young women.; But I.should like to know what is the use trying to polish .a woman, before you have, got a,, woman to polish. You can put the shine on to a leather boot, for there is some substance in it. But. you might rub brown'paper with the best of Day'and'Martin till doomsday, and not get'a bit of gloss ; thore ain't substance enough to hold the blacking. And yon'can. put the polish on to marble, and . brinjg out leaves and flowers, aud all sorts of. ornamental things, upon tho surface; but you might as well undertake to polish hasty pudding, as to do anything with a pieeb of chalk. It won't hold the stroke of the chisel, or respond to the touch of pumice stone. ' . ■! ; ' .. And it-is-just so. with sending a woman in the gristle to a fashionable boarding school. A girl wants to be solidified by home duties', and solid, studio?, befbro she is fit to be sent "away to takfj' on' polish. Something ought to'be dblie- fbr lxer physical education; to'make her body fit -,{or jthe..responsibilities ,of ,housekeeping,,. .andjl don't know of anything better, than to. have her help her mother. A woman has ;iio business to be married'until she has ishqvhi-'h'er capacity to 1 keep house. ■Shbj should know how to do everything, from washing, dishes up* to tlio nicest kind of cooking and needle-work.;. . , If they are ignovant of these things, accomplishments won't save them from mortification',and 'domestic tmhappiness. They will be as bad'bft' as pobr Eliza was at her first dinnerparty,after she got into: her new house. :She had :not been marriedl4o Dr. Sturgis more thaUi two. ; in,onths, before,she .invited a. company of • •their friends to dine. liis . : wifu' were there,, and. quite .:v number of middle-aged and'eldel'ly peoplp!,'like Mra. : Bu 1 iker and iilys'6lf 1* >i! Tfiere' >w&,3 1 A" great 1 i display of silver ware'and iincfiliiien; upon 1 'the table, forks,'castors, spoons, napkin, ■ r rings,- and fruit dishes,-that you /could soa : your face. in,, and .china plates,. r and vegetable dish'es with gilt; edges, and. nosegays, in the middle, so handsome !and natural, that' you could .almost smell the " perfume of the flowers. There was an air of triumphupon the face of' Mrs. Doctor Smith, as we sat down to dinner, as much as to say, " Now we shall see,what it is to have a daughter.educated, at a fashionable boarding-school,- and keep hOii.se l.n,style." There was considerable unction .about Air. . Spooner's grace before meat, as if"he.had got it up for the occasion." 'The Company 1 were in ihe best of spirits:, atadDrySturgis was slicing away at the turkey's breast, : when attention-was suddenly artfes^ed-by sundry corn, oats, and barley, slipping,out of the undressed crop of; the fowl. The • women folks at that end of !'that table put their handkerchiefs to their iibseS; 'as if ; 'they had s+bt wind of something that did 1 not smell like the roses on ! the' ilrottdm of 1 their plates. Mrs. Doctor Smith fidgettdd about in her chair, as if she was on pins. Eliza looked as crimson as a beet, clear to. the roots of her hair.. , Tho Doctor was at' the other end of the table, very busy discussing the last sermon or'election with Mr. Spooner, and did liot'see the trouble. Our Sally looked wicked, and ' winked across .the table to Josiah, and there wasa twitching about Josiah's mouth that I should say was wicked also; .if, lie was not a minister. Dr. Sturgis got over the matter' nicely, by rettairkirig' upon the undone condition 1 of the turkey,"and calling a servant to rbtnove the dish. 1 Fidelity to truth, I suppose, did not require -him to tell whether the rawness .pertained to . ! the cooking, or the dressing of ; the ;fpwl, . or. the housekeeper, that lay brick of both. Fortunately a liberal allowance had been made for the dinner, and the boiled fowls, purchased of a farmer • who married a housekeeper as well as a woman, did duty for the roast turkey cooked with his crop in.

Now I suppose a good many of your readers among women folks will old up both , their hands in astonishment at my standard of a good housewife. I say it is a shame and a disgrace for a woman not to know how tb do everything that ia done,, or ought to be done, : in ; her kitchen. There is just as much merit and womanly worth in knowing how to bring a turkey upon the dinuer. table..so-that it shall not be offensive to 'the taste and sniell of her. guests, as there is. in singing a good song, 1 or dressing in'good taste. ; ;It" addsyory fnueh to the comfort of 1 a woman to know how ;to .do everything irqiu : garret to cellar. The polishes all,well.enough', but let there be something ill the iirat placQ to put the polish on to. This doll work, in tiie place of a good old-fashioned wifo that knows what she is about, is poor business.

Now,-what I want to say to all parents that are bringing up girls is just this : Da not be afraid of putting them into tho kitchen—that, school of. womanly virtues —and keeping ■ tliem there' till thoy can tell the difference between' a'churn and a tea-kettle—till they;kiiow how to scour a 'saucepan, black- a stove, wash a floor, and cook a turkey: ;