Yankee Pep Plus Boost Equals Fortune-Perhaps

NZ Truth, Issue 1216, 21 March 1929, Page 1

Yankee Pep Plus Boost Equals Fortune-Perhaps

IP your , mental self-starter chatters when you step on it,- trying to remember whether that theatre appointment was for last Christmas or next Easter, leave it to Morgan. . '.. If , you feel right glad to meet folk, or, on the other hand, if you blush, be a man : — Meet Mahrgan, pardner m the Washingtpn .Institute- for memory improvement. - '..' ■'.' • '• •y ' You may be sitting m your humble chair, your gaze glued to. the signboard which says -"Manager," on the door just a little to your 'left, dreaming your dreams when you'll go home to little Molly and say: /"Molly; dear. ; I got a raise. ; to-day: They've made. me:,man-" ager . . ." A short, swift 6ourse pi Mahrgan's memory-mental mixture will adjust all your ills, and' show' you ' the way to go home, success-wards, -^hd^shouldyyo^rv^in^ ing oyer five-barred gates; .if your memory fails atythat- crucial moment, again, we say: See' Mahrgstri 1 . ; •"•;. Now. that E. ..li.' Mprgkn, ,'.-fr)eak of remembrance, or, rather, xemembering, ; has duly suffered introduction to.us all, it i 3 necessary to discuss his 'methods. Mahrgan (as he pronounces his ' name) comes from Wahshin'ton, where he arid his pardh'r, a man named Miller, were one nearly blinded by the light of inspiration ] -, that the birth-rate of tho.se who ' imagine themselves with bank presidents' penholders m their, pencil-cases is approximately- — well, urn— well, consistently, high and frequent. That 'was six years ago, and since then the Wahshin'ton Institodt has

shown many a man the way to remember that .fish forks are now dbsolete as collectors of the morning porridge; that if you have mental backache m your memory' area, Mahrgan will take away.' that every-picture-tells-a-story pain from it. But do not be. misled into the belief "that the Tnstitoot is Stricken with benevolence. It is. not.' A short while ago Mahrgan fell upon Brisbane, smote it hip and thigh with manifestations of expert salesmanship and uncanny recollectlve faculties, enveigled the Rotary Club with stunt demonstrations given at one of their luncheons, swept theni off their feet with the possibilities he created m their mirids,then gave them a day or so to think. it oyer. ..'■■■•'■. v In his attractive,- -gentlenfanly manner he made tactful representations to a leading member of the ;Rotary movement m -Brisbane, through whom he secured a list <of ' Rotarians, the Majority of whom < are highly-placed gentleman m both commercial 'and- professional capacities. His agent, or agents, employed »on the spur of the moment, and paid small salaries , with generous 1 commissionswould then commence : their drive through the alleyways already opened by their gifted principal, conferences between employees and Mahrgan were effected, and the subtle wheels operating the Wahshin'ton Institopt would commence their Rotary movements. Mahrgan seems to express an affinity with salesmen. W het ! her this is due to brotherly love, or because he''realises that most salesmen are itching to sell more cars, or merchandise, L,and have the flair for dreaming .. of how they may make two blades of grass grow instead of one is difficult to determine, but, like those famous correspondence course artists/, he knows the soft spots. ■ "Y'naw, gen'l'men, Y've awfn medda man who Beemsbe innerested In the claas goods y'saal. Waal, y'have an appinemen' with him inna week's time,

HE'S JUST A MEMORY "DEAR" m> — ~ ■•.'■'■■-■•''■•".-. He Has Passed On, but Oh No! He Is Not Yet Forgotten by His Clients MORGAN SHOWED W?W'' TO NET CASH (From "N.Z. Truth V Special Wellington Representative) • A new Aladdin is come among us. A bespectacled intriguing genie who weaves his persuasive spells of near-magic, while we, agape and dazzled by his remarkable salesmanship, buy eighteenoenny memory courses for three guineas.. v Have you a rusty memory lying bedraggled on the discard? JBring it along to E. L. Morgan for a jolt. Do you suffer from lassitude m the matter of remembering faces? Are your recollections torpid ? Areyou thicfe m the speech when trying to remember something? Bring it all, with your cheque book, to Morgan. He will relieve you.

an' doggone it all, y'caant remembrisname. y .'- ; "Bimeby, yeer gropin' an' gropin' fris name, w'en .-'nother " frenyours: curnsJawhg; , an' yew wahna innerduce him t'the first man, but yew caant thihkuvis name, any ( ew say 'Mister Simps'n, I'm righglad innerduce yew temißterr, temisterr, temisterrj- an' doggoheitall y'caant thinkuvishame. "Ha'nt that ever happ'en'd yew?" And so on. Those who are able to blush, do so, and within a few minutes one, may find the manager, or the general manager, or the chairman of directors expressing i;StTOn^vk,^ig£;^ fleriyed from "a ttriem ory . 'system such as .■thV ; -'rW&shin|;ton'yjtnsti.tute' _,-■■■ with the r^uitytiiat a .rgoo'd-. many of the subordinates,; realising that the eye of -the "chief": is upon them 'and their anvi ijl■irri rllit i r r 1 1 1 1 1 1 ill j 1 1 1 r 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 r 1 1 1 1 1 1 r 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 r 1 1 1 1 1 1

swers, sign up for utacutm/-'tyu_ iMCTiTIITr smart salesman two .or three :~. WASHINUION IIN_»lllUll- skittering, over the guineas' worth. iei» >f*vrton St.. N. E. globe. But to return M!ost of us dream w_»hinrton, D. c. to Mahrgan. our dreams of pro- ' THIS TICKET ENTITLES Having combed motion. Many df the ramifications of us purchase expen- :' ' one organisation, sive courses for m „.../..... ...,,/... c hustles along to one ... thing or an- •••.#........•..•.•.•••• ...t.. the next. Within other, each, seem- TO ATTEND sa y, a : fortnight, he ingly, a., signpost ALL MEMORY. LECTURES •'... has secured the to . overwhelming Price £3. signatures of per-' success. ■ ■ ;.,... . , .. r ". '' j haps five hundred or A fair proportion ' No Refund for Non-Attendance. a thousand clerks of these widely- MASONIC HALL; and salesmen who advertised courses The Tierr»e«. agree . to take a from America, "course" , of lecwhere everything, All at £3. Morgan's Lecture Ticket, tures, two m numfEOms blUShtng'y tO ..;-,-■ y-k^y^y^^ii^y- .-yy-^.y : .y, ..$-.■,:■■ -,-'--• -i-^B£^i^^i y^':'y',y; bandy legs, is cured by mail, leave /one While there is sprrie degree of merit dahgiing ,on the precipice of hklf-' m the material provided by the leckno.wledge, .tottering with the, ackndw- turer, ,it canno*: be gainsaid that, his - ledgme.nt that there are some darned ''course" is su'i^isingly incomplete, or 1 1 1 1 1 1 ■ i 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 ( 1 1 1 1 f 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 r 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 ii 1 1 1 1 1 1 rll j 1 1 1 ( 1 1 1 1 1 r f 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 ■i i 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 j 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 mlli 1 1 m 1 1 1 1 1 1 ri i 1 1 1 1 1 1 f 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 ii 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 i 1 1 1 nl l 1 1 1 1 1 1 rt i 1 1 1 1 1 rt 1 1 1 rll i 1 1 1 1 r 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 i 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1 1

that he is a force-feed; tutor who cvi-- : dently does not believe m laboring a point. "" . ' The basic principles of his (and pardn'r Miller's) system are very much akin to those of other mechanical aids to memory, but m point of time the relationship appears to cease. , The others may' take twelve months to master. Mahrgan and pardn'r Miller will give you a set-iip. real hotspot, jumpiri', jim'iny jink on the jolly ole. mem'ry m two short lectures; m two hours and fifteen secOnds. .He whirls you along to an intermediate ledge, pumps a few words of advice into that vacuum you had once ' 'scribbles' an 'acknowledgment cheque, sends his fountain- pen back With a cn-k t 0 its metal socket, thrusts a printed card into your shaking hands, arid Is off again. ' Mil jlllMlllinilllllllllllllllllnilllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllHllllllllliriNlllllllllllllM

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In essence, he tells you to keep your eyes and. ears open, your faculties alert whenever you meet people, , drawing > a _, mental picture of them m some fan- ■ tastic circumstances, so that you coufd not possibly, forget them when next lyou met. v One feels rather hurt, though, at 3 being asked to. pay from two 5 .pounds ten to three -guineas to be told that. Particularly, when ' a tiny book .called "Systematic s Memory^', published- m . 1906, says the same thing, v minus the 'accent. T It may be that Brisbane and Adei laide,;like. Wellington, heard, that "Sys- . temati'c' 'Memory,'' sans twang, sans Mahrgan, could be had for eighteen ' _pe'iicey and that the* people of these cities "are indulging themselves m some y acute yspasms of ..mental and. . ; li.ter.al v 'arithffi L the '^wf ul;' sluhip : m their pass-books. " Early, 'iri January of. this year Mor- "; gany crossed over, from Australia to ' New Zealand, -and. during "the voyage ! played many games of bridge with a 1 i. gentleman from Wellington. ".'..- --j-A ;few days- after the ship's gangway was lowered at the Wellington /wharf, the' other man met Mahrgan m Willis Street, and said "Good-day" to him, but the genTman from the Americas knew him not, gazing blankly, yet apologetically at him, for the mental . picture was not cjear that 'after*- - ;ndbn.: ■ " '■ ; Which is a very bad thing for a ' miracle-worker among the memories. What might be called Mahrgan's ' - ' ' ' • .■ i ik . ' '•.

i sales : talk; is so much like the physic one swallowed when the 'flu epidemic was on; in 'that it almost seems as though the Wahshin'ton Instjtoo t.borrowed the idea. It's a queer mixture. On the one handyfor. example, one is told, of tHe iriiiraculous things which may be accomplished with a, memory adjusted by Mahrgan's mental chiropractiques. On the; other, that the system encourages only the day-to-day memory cells to if unction;. 'that as soon as those ephemeral business details have taken definite shape on the files they .'should- be plucked from the honeycombed grey matter and, no, not "forgotten," just discarded, making room for the day's "appinements ah' bizners dedails." It may well be, of course, that" Mahrgan and pardn'r Miller are followers of that delightful axiom- which says -that while the left hand is up and-do-ing, the right shall be kept m the dark..'. ', -' - '„.-.- -..-, One should be forgiven for the slight tinge of scepticism which has crept m, here and there. ' , Then we have' that annpying "madder of telefawn nummers." To those of . us who looked to the lr»6titoot for enlightenment as to 'what cerebral push-buttons we had to press when remembering the telephone numbers of friends or business associates, it was galling to learn that Mr. Mahrgan could be of little, or, rather, no help. It is only when" we bring arithmetic and some faint memories of advertised correspondence courses from America to bear upon , our struggles and troubles, that we commence to feel more satisfied with . ourselves, to realise our own possibilities. • ' There is one something like this: Aren't you tired of being on the lower rungs? ..Quit dreaming — ACT — the Cl'ickVclack Course . will make you a Radio Engineer / in 90 <days! Don't have any regrets. Clip tlie coupon NOW- WE'LL, show you HdW.