The Critic

NZ Truth, Issue 1196, 1 November 1928, Page 1

The Critic

TN the recent cyclone everything was shifted on some farms except the mortgage. . .•••.«■#. .# TF. we could dnly get a cyclone behind some of the ponies occasionally punters would get a run for their money. ■ ■'■-,■ • * ■.-.- #■ • ■*■;■■■ HAILY PAPER: "The patient was - suffering from recketts." His outlook must be blue. . „ ■ • ■ *:■:■.#;.....; * ■'.' AFTER a man. had painted his boat, v^ a cow came and licked^Lll the paint off, says a daily. That certainly was a cow, wasn't it? # * • '* ■ ACCORDING to Air-Marshall Sir f^, John. Salmond,,it.is plane.^that the Australian Air Force --is not rising to the occasion. : # .'■*.. * TO the modern flapper, cigarette .- smoking is certainly a draw-back. # * *

JJAILY PAPER: "Felled with bott'e of beer." It generally takes more than that to knock us. '*» * ' WILLiAGE headmen are to be provided with bicycles m New Guinea.; Bike Crikey! #* . * A GANG rule: When the gin's m, the gun's "out. # ■ # . . # :>■;/ MOW, isn't it lucky for centipedes that their wives haven't caught the "all-silk-from-tbp-to-toe" habit? » . . # * ' '•;•# . TN the Melbourne waterside game of euchre, the police are making clubs trumps. '* # # THE politician lives by words; the • lawyer by deeds. # . '* .'■ • ' PLERGYMAN says: "Truth is a flying goal." Which explains*why so few of our politicians ever score a try. "W7AR does not settle disputes," says " Sir Oliver Lodge. It settles a lot of the 'disputants, though. ■ ', •*' " . ' w • ■ » • • MEDlCAL'students at the University are asked to put down more money. That "M.D." means money down. # '"•■ .# ' > fABLED that "Boxing, .is booming .m *"* America. They box-12,000. victims of gunmen" and other killers annually. # # * AND -again/ "A. Girl Skipper." Not exactly the kind to take for a mate. # ■ • # * .

A WRITER asks: "Knees—V/here Are They?" Clearly a case for an oculist. ' '. MANY a slip 'twixt the Cup and the ■ tip. ' # . *.. * A PIECE of gorgonzola—the mitey atom. #- # * "QN a world tour studying the music , of primitive peoples," says a daily, concerning a tourist. : We must certainly introduce him to the gentleman with the crystal set m the flat upstairs. ■ ■ # . # * "MEWS": "The Weather m Brief." - - "' * " • •■ • . ' PENE TUNNEY threatened to smash .a" pressman's camera. A positive negative. -■•■".*, # • TN a recent divorce suit the wife "used 1 an iron poker on her husband's head as a sedative." We thought iron was a tonlcl , ,