Passing Show

NZ Truth, Issue 1188, 6 September 1928, Page 6

Passing Show

SiiiiiiuiiimiiiiiiiiiiiiiininiimiiiiiiiniiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiMiiiiiiiiiiiiiimiiuDRIDAL Sating—Bridegroom sat-oh. # #'■■-'#■ "W/OMEN's' Fixtures."— Very few. V # ■■#■'» QONFIDENCE man's motto: A bird m the city is worth two iri the bush. #.■'#. • • "J^ICKED Live Wire."— The go-get-ter must have annoyed him. i * ■* . * . COMEONE ought to make a. study of our burglars' Sike-ology. '•*■■■ # '■■ , ■*' "S OMB heat wa^ manifested over cremation." Naturally. .# # * "{£ISS and. make up" is the true flapper's motto. '•-.■• # : * THE two -up Bohools nave been havirig a bad spin. „_, ■ # * # CAFE blown m a butcher's shop." '-'Some flies! • • *■ .■■■ \ # •■■'»' VS7HEN a woman is weighed m the balance m the Divorce, Court, ■ she is generally found wanting — alimony. ... * ' '.■■•../■"'.'*' ':' ". - TN books, chaps • square their jaws when they get m tight corners; m real life they< square . their Juries. -.*' • -• ■■#'.•'. "MOT one alive— 3l dead."— Those half dead and half alive must have been missed out of the tally. " .'■'•..'■'.*' # # ;. TS it only coincidence that the word proROGUE is always being used about Parliaments? # •;-,*■ "POLICE; search for gunman with f tilted nose." Hoping the. rest .of him will turn lip. ; - ; T # ■.".#■, ■. • * , ; . ;■ ■■ ' TF ever anyone stumbles on t_« secret A of perpetual motion, it will be a traffic cop.--■'l' • '■■*■■'.'■: '•" * ' "OUBURBAN youths arrested for vIJ stealing rug." Now they will be on the mat. ■-■'#". *■ '•* ■' ' ' 'f : .- : - W7HEN shall we see, for a change: ™ "Motorist knocked downby pedestrian"? •' ' ".'■*' '. • ■ ''"•"

MANY girls take to their husbands '*" more after marriage. DATLIFFS axe said to live longest.: °, They manage to survive all their seizures. '•- ■'■•■''■ ■.. #..-'•■ . •- I ATEST notion is to cross the Atlan- ■" tic on a bicycle-boat. After that, we shall feel terribly bored unless somebody gets across on stilts. * ' ' * ■, ' * "TRENCH Bluebeard who slew fifteen * fiancees used "view mat." ads. to dupe' "women of mature age." Murder most. fowl. ' • . ■•- #-...* CORRESPONDENT protests that V*" ' motor-hearses are being . raced through his suburb. 'Somebody trying to put the "fun" m "funeral" ? » * * TOTALLY deaf man' was granted- a~ •*• divorce la.st week. Jiist shows how marriage can break down even when it seems to have everythirig m its favor. . # * ' s # ■ ;■ DROPOSED that our detectives should T have special training m "clues." An excellent first " course would be ,a railway guide. ■' .: #..'*■ \ „ * "QHOULD a returned soldier dabble m polltitics?" Any "Digger" who survived a German poison-gas attack may safely dabble m politics. ■< ■ : * .'*'■■* MAN' inserted a notice m an agony column' asking for the whereabouts of a man named Cannon. Obviously, he had gone off. .-'. • '<: * -..'*. . *.-'.-' TN Java goals m a Soccer game are *■ signalized by the firing of a gun. In New Zealand games, too, goals are rare. / • # * ■■*-,' nYSTERS interfered -with raf]io under- water tests m America.— The programmes must have been modelled on the New Zealand pattern. •' ' •.-■''■•'■

"M''Z, TRUTH" pjcks a team to meet -'■■*"• the Springboks. • I . # '• '*. ■ •• ■■■ WOMAN shed tears when telling the judge' of her unhappy married life. Remorse Court? ■ * '*.'.■■* ' A MAN is as old as he feels, and a t* woman as old as she. looks, whloh no doubt explains why they call New Zealand a young country., -"■ * *-■.. *'*.'■ MR. WILBUR, of XJ.S.A., says the way iVI to prevent war is to have, ai big navy. Which reminds us that the way to prevent a big fire is. always to have plenty of petrol lying "around. • * '-. ■ :.' * ' '*• EVENING • paper: "Everyone knows *-* the devious ways of pirates iri the China Seas." We don't precisely.fcnow 'em 'ourselves, but we get a fair notion from watching politicians. * '. ' * * DID a ship, berthed near her home, bring the winter mosquito which infected a young typlste with dengue? demands a daily. We saw nothing, m the passenger lists to suggest it. WOMAN m Waco (Texas) last w&ek walked into the local; newspaper office, • Bhot her husband there, t . and poisoned herself and two daughters on the premises. The editor, it xs understood, died of joy. v * * ','- ■■*. A SARDINE and a Wellington tramway passenger, happening to meet, exchanged experiences. When the passenger had finished, the sardine said: "The only thing I can't understand is why they never seem, to put the oil m with you." ' ■'."/' * » -■-;:•*--' ■ jJINTS to housewives: When choosing *~* flat-irons, always consider their weight m relation to your ability to If your husband is m the habit of c0 ing out a great deal at nights, the regular inclusion of a little garlic m his dinners may help to keep him at home. _ '■■' Powdered glass, ground very fine; :s an inexpensive item that may be included m almost any dish, and is especially suitable for husbands who are i difficult to please. ; ; ..; . In case of fire, immediately look up the date of last premium payment. After that, housewives should remain cool and use their judgment. A tasty, economical soup may be made with the string from a piece of corned beef. Many popular boardinghouses serve nothing else. . ,*