The Critic

NZ Truth, Issue 1187, 30 August 1928, Page 1

The Critic

W7HAT does the man who usually " drinks with the flies do m winter time? .■■••■■■ TF ever New Zealand girls adopt the ■*■ Continental;" system of wearing watches on their-; garters no one will have any difficulty- m seeing the time. DOCTOR says there are 40,000 mi- ■ crobes m every kiss. Another little 0 wouldn't dp us anj' harm..; • * * . *■■. %7E8.1t. y often, a' gM goes, too; far.-iber T cause' she rwoii f walk back. !.'■■- * y;y *. #

THE old-time highwayman ' robbed *■ the -rich to give to the poor. The modern politician also sticks up for the poor — at four hundred a year. • # * * C HOULD girls be spanked? asks one of them. Not so as to leave a bad impression. ss # * EXCESSIVE noise is costing British *-' industry a million a week m impaired efficiency due to nerves. On that basis, factories will soon be kicking up a, row for nothirfg. THOUSANDS of English clergy are *• said to be almost starving. But they'll get pie m the sky when they die! » * * ' -. AN^ American • millionaire has been ** cured of hiccoughs by being put into an hypnotic spell. A dry spell is the usual cure. "* * # A PARSON says that science and re- ** ligion were never nearer than they are to-day. So near as to be almost at each other's throats. **, ■ * THE Anti-Kissing League says that *■ indiscriminate kissing is more dangerous than a motor smash. But who wants to flirt with Death? *•...*_ * . MEN with liver trouble are said to be greater travellers than those of normal health. The call of the bile! * • * .•* AT wild parties the Colonel's lady, and Judy O'Grady are sisters under their skinsful!

A MAN is like a 'bus. Once he is] caught and married he is never run after. He is sat upon. # # * \7IENNA woman fell hopelessly m love with a s radio announcer's voice and then suicided. The voice that breathed o'er ether. .. * * * T ONDON tin hare company made a ij profit of 14,000 per cent. The tin hare doesn't need any scent when the promoters have such a nose for money. # * * MAN complains that his wife hurled m a pound of butter at him^ Madame Butterfly! , # # * pIRL navvies working m Scotland ys are said to be steadier workers than men. Well, on turning out of a morning they'd be more eager to show a leg. # # * LONDON clothes critic says New Zealand clothes are not really smart. Still, they cover a multitude of shins! JAPAN plans to have an air fleet of 800 'planes within three years. The wings of the mourning. # # ♦ "THE demand for whisky for medi- •*• cinal use shows how sick Americans are of Prohibition. - PHILANTHROPIST is one who distributes camphor-balls to the poor ±o put m their rage. V '. .-i-Ui. . -t.il.--.. ... '