The Critic

NZ Truth, Issue 1153, 5 January 1928, Page 1

The Critic

JUDGING by the way certain newsJ papers are featuring bathing beauties there, Australia is becoming a land of great bare spaces. # * « I OVER who cut a girl's throat pleaded that he wouldn't harm a hair of her head. Well, most girls would rather "die than have their shingle spoilt. . *' * * THE touch of a vanished hand— The pickpocket's! THERE'S to be no betting on coursing dogs after sunset. But punters will still be able to turn their money over every new moon. ' ■rJ.oynspn :Hick^.; •■;.,' Bu fc^ihe. figure S has some delightful, curves.' .

A LONDON priest at a wedding ceremony, considered the bride's dress deficient and asked her to wear a surplice. The surplice made up the deficit. * * # LJUNDREDS of new cars appear on New Zealand streets every week. There's a rattling time ahead for someone. * . *. ■• * COME of the girls of to-day might easily be mistaken for men, but some of the boys— never! * # . # ARE short frocks becoming? asks a clergyman. ■ They're becoming shorter! ■ * * . ' * PILES had his head in the clouds but ° that was all. * # * A FARMER complains his son ran away at harvest time and got a job as boots at a city hotel. "Making hay while the son shines."- ■#■ * ■ * DEAUTY used to be skin deep; now it's rouge thick. * .* ■ . * "CHIP'S captain absconds with £500." A good skipper. * . ■ ' * . ■ • . * CINCE the advent of short skirts, ■ many an ugly man has become a good looker. • ; * *■ * WERY often there's a lot of sharp work goes on in flats. * * - •#■

AN anti-Jewish Society charges a membership fee of £2 10s. A lot of Gentiles would have to visit a Jew before joining. # # * TANKS are being used against American mine strikers. Mineowners want to make success a dead certainty. ♦ # * PL/ERG YMAN complains that girls' surf costumes are too short. Men say they look longer. • * • ■ ' ■■ AN American millionaire has been ** cured of hiccoughs by being put into an hypnotic spell. A. dry spell is the best cure. * * # HOCTOR says there are 40,000 microbes in every kiss. Another little 0 wouldn't do tis any harm! # -I*. . '*'•' ; CHOULD girls' be ; spanked? asks a social writer. Not so as to leave a bad impression. : * #■ • # : j CURFERS are often up to their necks u in trouble. . : * ■*.••. * . v MAN who lost £150 found a lily stalk in his pocket. An emblem of the thief's purity? ,x"^ . ' #.-' ' *;-. y> - ''' TN the last three inonUC; .police liave collected over £ 700 in opium fines. These Chinamen have money to burn. .VWOMEN : are potential pawnbrokers — 1-. (when a man pledges himself to Qrie^she thinks she holds. Ms interest