WHAT'S A " WOWSER " ?

NZ Truth, Issue 12, 16 November 1907, Page 8

WHAT'S A " WOWSER " ?

WHY WOWSERS WORRY AND WHINE.

"What Must I Do to be Saved?"— The Sickening Selfishness of Shrieking "Saints."

! This ouestion has been prominent of late m both the daily press and the weekly press of Australia (says Melbourne "Truth"), but no adequate answer has yet been given. Every parson, from Judkins, Tregear, and "Warty Wools," to Bishop Smith, and Salvation Sam, is sure he is not a "wowser," though each one of these loving Christians experiences secret joy when a rival is so styled by the "unregenerate "; but as for himself ! Every layman, too, is sure that he knows, what a "wowser" is, and yet among any dozen casually chosen, and called upon to explain the origin and nature of "wowserism" the only unanimity would be their agreement to differ. • » * The truth appears to be that while the effects are plain enough, the thing itself is very ancient, and not confined to any one time or region; its origin being lost m the mist of ages though its objectionable presence ever manifests itself m all climes, and am on-- all peoples, so soon as they have reached a certain stage of religious development. This is because "wowserism" is a morbid excrescence, or unhealthy growth —a sort of theological wart. Palgrave m his "Central and Eastern Arabia" gives some excellent examples of Mahometan "wowserism." In some of the towns and districts the "Wahabbees," a very extreme Mussulman sect, were then (about 1860) m the ascendant, and bad inaugurated a "Jehad" against tobacco m any form i"st as the JudMnses recently started "a crusade" against gaming and m any form. This" was very like Tregear forbidding M^ko and Billo to "back their fancy," or an attemnt by triumphant teetotallers to forcibly deprive the poor man of his beer. * « " The "Wahabbee" "Mollahs" -maintained that tobacco was an accursed thing the plant having— according to Arabian "tradition"— sprung from 'the urine of Satan himself when he trespassed upon the domains of Paradise—and that to use it was a "sin," it being, moreover, included m the Prophet's denunciation of wine and strong drink ; for it is curious that m Arabic there is no equivalent for the word "smoking," the term for the use of . stimulants and narcotics being literally rendered as "drinking the shameful" (thing). Many of the wretched Arabs, feeling the loss of their tobacco, m a land where enjoyments of ac- kind are few enough, indulrcl m secret— but the Wahabbee—"s^ot- ; tcrs"— were soon m evidence. They ; would nrowi. sniffing and snvinT ! round the narrow streets and dens iof the town. and. ha.vin-- r marked their "rev one would wit.**!. "-Vile another rushed for thc ¥'U>hs. These fierce Dervishes, carrying formidable whips and armed to the teeth, would soon be on tbe scene, when the unhappy "drinker of the shameful" would experience a fearful punishment— sometimes even losing his life. ■ * • In their insolent assumption of

authority to define as "sin" harmless pleasures, their sneaking methods of detecting, and their merciless ways, and the sivage delight m punishing it, these Mollahs were only Judkins and Warty Wools endowed with power. Palgrave is recommended to legislators as a guide when sporting, gaming and liquor legislation is on the tapis. Indeed, this competent authority seems to regard Islam as from the first saturated with the spirit of "wowserism," a prominent feature of which is unsocial religious fanaticism. a « « One more Arabian instance, and we shall, turn to Christian^ "wowserism." Pale-rave, whose detection as a "Giaour," or European Christian, would have meant his instant death, was disguised as a Syrian Christian "hakim," and merchant from Beirout, and out of curiosity he pretended to a desire to forsake his religion and become a Wahabbee Moslem. Having thus won the confidence of a chief Mollah, he requested information as to what "a true B-. liever" should regard as "the greatest sin." The instant and unhesitating reply was "drinking the shameful," (i.e., smoking tobacco, or opium, or taking wine). "I can quite understand you saying so," said Palgrave, "but about murder, adultery, and false witness." With a superior smile the old Mollah replied : "My son, God is great. Those are little' sins (i.e., compared with smoking). These examples show the underlying "spirit" or "motif" of "wowserism" everywhere, which is the fanatical, unsocial hatred as "sin" of harmless, mental and physical enjoyments, nnd the denunciation of "use" instead of the "abuse" of them. * * * Our own present "wowserism" is the result bf the development of our National religion. Pounded on Judaism, it accepted as literally true the Mosaic account of the "Creation," of the Cosmos, and the "Fall of Man." The Christian conception of these things, and their tremendous consequences, have been fully set forth by the learned and representative Puritan, John Milton, m his great classic, "Paradise Lost," and. so skilfully has he embodied the beliefs of Christian men of his own day. and of the succeeding period up to Charles Darwin's "Origin of Species" (about 1860), that the ideas of all such men— Catholic and Protestant alike— concerning "God and the World," may he well termed "The Miltonic Conception of the Universe," ami it still holds sway over the Christian Churches and sect.__, which have only done lin service to j science, si ml hate both her and her sis ter— Moder n Theology. * * SJ. As thc. consequence of this "Miltonic Conception" there was, and still is. among all Christians, a number of men whose minds were and are morbidly excited— and that almost . to madness— by the awful terror of their position, before an "avenging God," backed by the Vlake of fire, and a legion of tormenting devils." The haunting horrors of these ideas, have led, and still lead them, to the strangest mental and moral excesses— and sometimes to physical ones. Thus we find ecclesiastics describing the souls of unbaptised babes wailing and burning, burning for ever m "hell" with many other still more horrible pictures of the "eternity of torment." We learn from the case of John Bunvan, "the inspired < inker of Bedford." how the dread of "damnation" affected an imaginative and ignorant layman, and made him see terrific "visions" only rivalled by those of the "inspired lunatic of Patmos." In the "Pilgrim's Progress," we get Ihe first flimrtse of the foundation of modern "wowserism," which is the combination of that universal .motif" we have olrepdr indicated, and the desperate and selfish determination of e.^ch- indriUin! "wowser" to "save his mis«rable soul" on the principle of : "Each man for himself, and the devil take thc hindmost." * • * Thus the "Christian" lives m the "City of Destruction," and his Bible makes him awfully miserable. Not on account of the sorrows of men and animal suffering. Not because his home, wife and children are to be destroyed. Not because he doubts his possession of an immortal soul--the existence of a Personal God— His justice mercy, or wisdom—or -the value of the supposed "revelation"—of h's nature and purposes m tl.. "inspired world," but merely on account of his own danger. "What m**~t I do to be saved ?" is his sole thought, his constant cry, the first and last object of his exertions from the moment he frantically "bolts for heaven," m order to avoid "the wath to come," until the hour of his de-vth. It was degenerate Puritanism which made Bunyan possible, and the same thine— working on ignorant and narrow minds— combined with social unrest and aided by the ne?lect and tyranny of a corrupt und careless clergy, and the brutal vnuirarchv of the time, produced Wesleyanism among the proletariat of England about 100 years ago and which with its imitations, and allied sects, is responsible for the ' worst forms of "wowserism" at present extant. * • • Wesley waa a highly imaginative | neurotic personage, more of an her- ! maphrodite than a normal man m ■ his physical appearance and mental characteristics, and who earned the ; hearty, whole-souled, and well-deser- ; ved contempt of the woman who knew him best. Wesbyanisra, which claims this poor degenerate abnormality as its founder, was, and has ever been, as n uch a social and political, as a religious, movement -representing the protest of the "Puritanical" sections of the proletariat against the ecclosiastiopl and social patronage, tyranny, and exploitation of the dominant Anglican churchmen, and the "classes" generally. So far as they represented religious "dissent" the oritrinal "''i c -sp..ters" were ignorant or narn-.w n in^'ed bigots--i desperately flying from "the wrath

to come," and to "save th« soul from hell" was to them the whole raison d'etre of life and religion. They discovered that "conviction of sin" and "repentance" were ' .c prelb varies to conversion," which proce.-,. having been gone through, with various fantastical, mental and physical contortions and antics, and "agenies," the regenerate "sinner" was "risht for both worlds." No matter how vile a scoundrel he may bo— or how worthless his mental and physical frame— he can, by this extraordinary process, be "saved" not by God's mercy, extended to him after the remainder of a contrite life, spent m humble confidence of receiving it, but instantly, here and now, as soon as the antics have passed a certain stage, and produced some peculiar mental condition, readily recognised by the "adepts" of the "cult," m such a way that not only may he openly and publicly brag of his "salvation," but the always blatent and generally worthless bounder, can insolently ask others "about the state of their souls," and can "exhort" and "testify" m public. *■ * * Such things were, and still are, characteristic of "dissenters" m general, and Wesleyans m particular, as a visit to many "Little Bethels" or to any large "Salvation Army Camp" will convince anyone. It is but fair to say that Wesleyans and Dissenters have progressed m education and social position, and can now boast of many clergymen and laymen of healthy intellect and good mental calibre ; but these are readily distinguished from the rank and file— and are generally better than their religion. There are, too, on the other hand, a few Anglicans and Presbyterians, and others who have degenerated ' into "wowserism," which, as it exists among us here m Australia, is more characteristic of the "sects" than of the "churches." It can be fairly defined as the result of the "Miltonic Conception of God and the .World," as applied to practical life and conduct, by selfish, cowardly men, of Puritanical ideas, and of varying degrees of ignorance and bigotry. * * « These parsons, being largely destitute of the spirit of their profes-wd' Master, and full of spiritual pride at their supposed "salvation," while all who differ from them are "lost,", presume, with studied impudence, to dictate to others as to their conduct m the ordinary affairs of life—especially on the social side. They are too cunning to interfere with moneymaking and "business." Thus, under hypocritical pretence of promoting morality and Christianity, they seek, firstly, to force upon normal minds their unhealthy, sombre, and narrow, religious views, and still worse ways of living ; and, secondly, to indirectly revenge themselves upon . those large sections of the community who openly, or by implication, despise them- and their teachings— and to gratify their personal spite at their expense. This they do by interfering m all lairds of provoking and pettiiv tyrannical wars, per medium of meddlesome municipal and legislative enactments—and adminis trativp methods— witb the consenU'en! constant cuvt-ait'msnt of the personal liberties, actions, amusements, ahd enjoyments of the people. * • * . "By their fruits ye sha.ll know them," and whenever men are found who, however plausible their alleged motives, denounce music, dancing, theatricals, wine, tobacco, sport and sundry recreation as "sinful" m nature— who are always unhealthily concerned about the sexual relations of the community, and generally talking, or acting, as though "this world" was, as Mr Weller, sen., said, "a wail." and hopples^ly given over to "the 'devil." and that you were only put m it m order to "save your soul," you may know you are dealing with "wowsers," and jrentlemen who take rood cure r\f No. 1. and are most emphatically "right for both worlds."