Page 2 Advertisements Column 1

New Zealand Times, Volume XXXIII, Issue 5438, 31 August 1878, Page 2 (Supplement)

The Wicked Plumber,—The New York Tima writes often with great severity of plumbers ami their extortions. The following is an instance During the recent exceptionally mild winter there have been little or no opportunities for crime offered to-the plumbers, and hence it was generally supposed that great distress existed among, them. Good men naturally rejoiced at the state of things. Many excellent fathers of families pbinted out to their children the supposed fact that the plumbers were starving, as an illustration of the truth that the way of transgressors is hard, and hundreds of Sundayschool superintendents pictured to horrified children the death-bed of the gaunt and hungry plumber, with the view of warning them that even in this world wickedness sometimes meets with its proper punishment. There are probably few kind-hearted and philanthropic people who are not firmly convinced that a delightful amount of destitution and a most encouraging mortality have prevailed among the plumbers during the lost few months. It is painful to dispel these pleasing illusions, but it must be done. If the community is suffered to be lulled into a false security by the erroneous belief that plumbers are rapidly becoming extinct, it will be so much the wotse in the end for those who have embraced that comforting delusion, A month ago one of our best citizens, who owns [several dwelling houses, and is consequently in much financial distress, fell Into a condition of confirmed melancholy. His physician, who is an unusually skilful man, hit upon the idea of cheering up his patient by inducing him to visit the various plumbers* shops. 3o told the melancholy citizen that the plumbers were actually starving to death, and that he would undoubtedly find a great deal of wholesome and rational amusement in contemplating their suffering. The patient greeted tho remark with a smile—the first that has illuminated his countenance in many months—and instantly rang for his cairriage. As he entered the carriage ho turned to bid the physician good-byo, and asked: •• Do you really believe they are starving ?” and when the learned and astute man promptly replied that they were, he laughed loudly and drove away in high spirits. Ho returned a few hours later, gave a sealed envelope to his wife, with tho direction to hand It to his physician, went instantly to bed. and died at 11. 35 p. m. On opening tho envelope the physician fonnd that it contained a report on tho condition of Now York plumbers. Instead of finding them In the agonies of starvation, the patient had been shocked to find that theywore one «nd all in high spirits, and apparently full of business. They were well dressed and apparently well fed, and displayed even more independence and insolence than they had ever displayed before. Several times the astonished visitor was told, as soon as he entered a plumber's shop, “ Now, you get right out of here ; wo have more jobs on hand than wo can do in six months, and you'll have to go to some other shop with your business/' In short, the plumbers wore evidently in tho most prosperous condition, and the effect upon the melancholy patient was so depressing that he wont homo, and died of what the physician asserted was a broken heart. Monsieur Taine on the Beauty or English Ladies.—The point which seems particularly to have impressed itself upon tho mind of this brilliant French writer, with respect to “English beauties” is the " dazzling purity of their complexions.” Doubtless, Nature has richly endowed our countrywomen in this respect, but art has d'me no less, in supplying such an exquisite preparation as Howlands’ Kalydor, which so far aids nature as to remove freckles, roughness of skin, tan, and sunburn, and produces a pure and delicate complexion. Buy only Howlands’, of 20, Hatton Garden, Loudon. Sold all over the world by chemists, druggists, bazaar ard storekeepers.—Whole sale agents, Felton, Grimwaob, & Co.—fADVTI Holloway’s Pills.—Disorders of the kidneys, known by the deeply-seated pain In the back and scanty secretion of water, can be arrested in their distressing and rapid course by these regulating pills. Their highly tonic and strengthening properties prevent tho impoverishment of tho blood and tho derangnvmt of circulation, characteristic of kidney, disease, and often ending in partial or general dropsy. Experience has proved that almost unvaried success is obtained when Holloway’s Pills are taken in the earlier stages, and the ease they afford when tho complaint Is more advanced. They relax the hot and parched skin, overcome tho attendant costivencas, induce a copious secretion by the kidneys, and arc the harbingers of disease departing, and health returning.—

Advertisements Gratis EW ZEALAND RAILWAYS. STORE CONTRACT. EAST TOWN STATION—PATEAMANAWATU RAILWAY. Public Works Office, Wellington, 27th July, 1878. WRITTEN TENDERS will bo received at this office up to NOON on MONDAY, the 26th AUGUST, 1878, for the above contract, They must be addressed to the Hon. the Minister for Public Works, Wellington, and marked outside “ Tender for Store Contract, East Town Station.” Plana and specifications may bo seen at the Public Works Offices, Auckland, Wanganui, Foxton, and Wellington. tenders, cimilarly addressed and marked, will be received if presented at any telegraph office by Neon of the same date, provided that written tenders in duo form are lodged at any of the above-named offices by the same hour, and accompanied by a cheque on some bank in the town where the tender is lodged ; such cheque to be specially marked by a banker as good for 21 days, and to be in favor of the Receiver-General’s deposit account only, and not to bearer or order. The lowest or any tender will not necessarily be accepted. Engineer in Charge, North Island. N.B. —Plans for this contract can be purchased at the above offices. By command. JOHN BLACKETT,