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New Zealand Times, Volume XXX, Issue 4494, 14 August 1875, Page 2 (Supplement)

“ W/icue," says a Yankee editor, ‘‘is that elderly scamp who lias howled for sixty-three years for an old-fashioned winter? Where is the old reptile that we can get at him ? How wo would like to run him through a planing mill run by ice water, and cut him open with a snowplough, and fill him full of snowballs, and sew him up witli an icicle, and strap him to the north pole until the spring rains released him —the awful wretcli

A moss the requests for prayer sent in to tho champion exhortcr was one from a young laily, an only sister, who wished prayers for her brother, a young man of nineteen, who is not to be found iu Ins earthly or heavenly home. The delicacy with which tho young lady conveys her brother’s address to the general public is only equalled hy the accuracy of her knowledge of it. Du. Sc.MXKR once held a canon’s stall hi Durham Cathedral, where he frequently performed service. The students of the university attended service in tlie centre of the church. Olio morning an undergraduate, coming in whilst the organist was playing the voluntary, made haste to got to his seat. Hurrying past tho lectern, Ids gown caught and began to tear. As is their wont, the students tittered : tho unfortunate undergraduate, becoming confused, rushed on, splitting ids gown into halves, and by tho very noise made with the tearing drawing universal attention, before lie had got to Ids scat the canon rose abstractedly, and commenced the service with, “llend your hearts and not your garments,” Ac. The whole congregation, already with dillieulty suppressing its amusement, burst into laughter. Tiieiik lives a widow out West who never did anything useful until after her husband died, and left her half a dozen children to take care of. .She thought a great deal of her husband, but ho did not leave her enough substance to buy him a gravestone, and this fact set her to work. She determined tiiat the poor man’s grave should have a respectable mark. So she got a marble slab, and went to work on it, making a gravestone for the departed. Tims she began to carve out her fortune. She finished the work, and learned tlie trade of a stone-cutter at thc.same lime. She soon did some other marble work, and offered it tor sale. It proved acceptable, and she was given a permanent place in a marble yard, and is making regular artist’s wages, and keeping lier family in good style. Sometimes a husband does turn out a benefit to a woman though she may not realise his use until she loses him. Domestic Infeoioitv.—A man and Ids wife, who had been married ten years, disagreed aud determined to separate. The terms of separation were to ho decided by the justice of tiro arrondisement in which they lived. They were Parisians. “ Have you any children?" said the judge. “ Yes, Monsieur." “How many?” “ Three; two boys and a girl, and it is with them lies Hie difficulty. Madame wi hes to have two of them; so do X." “Have you agi cd to abide by my decisionf” “We have,” said both of them. “ Vefy well, my friends;! condemn you to have another child, so that you may each I :.ve two. When you have obtained that yon may return to me." The matter was then adjourned for the ti.no being. Two years afterwards tlie worthy magislr do. who in the meantime had heard nothing of the husband or wife, met the former. “Ah,” said bo, “how about the separation i’ 1 “Still impossible, Moisienr. Instead of four children we have now five.”