It is Town Talk

Free Lance, Volume VI, Issue 282, 25 November 1905, Page 22

It is Town Talk

— That, if it wasn't for has neglected half-brother, Ink, the Pern would be no mightaer than a butcher's skewer. — That the greatest respect is shown for Mr. Hislop. People on tihe roads Btan'd aside when, he goes by — i/n his great big motor car. — That if some dear, kind, lecturing people would remember that oiliness> is not holiness, "life would' be better and hesuren more near." — That Wallace is believed to be, by some British players, "the prince of Rugby players." Wonder will he be the Prince of Wales? — That the vicar of Whangarei is said to be a high churchman. It is something for the church to be able to add a Oubitt to its stature. — That, "as the singer willed! so the audience were," is a charming appreciation of the power of Jessie Maclachlan, the Scottish singer. — That December 6th is the date of the general elections. It is also the anniversary of the New Zealanders first action in the war they fought for tihe Chinamen. — That it would, according to General Booth, take a million pounxfe sterling to relieve London's poverty for eight weeks. A million acres would relieve it for all time. — That not long ago Auckland City Council appointed A. Messer to its staff. Now, A. Juggins has been appointed to the valuation staff. Only a coincidence, of coairse. — That a large 'hotel in Christahurch, which still carries a license, has been sold to a business firm, who intend using; it — niot for a hotel. More injustice to the drought-smitten ! — That, according to the Presbyterian Assembly, "the amount spent on sport in New Zealand is ridiculously excessive." Now, if it couild all be diverted into the "collection" ! — That Patea desires to discover the "author" of a "volume" of smoke, published in a local hotel. It is conceded to be "light" literature, and was started with a pile of music. — That eeveral men were seen to turn up their coat-collars when Maughan Bamett raised "The Storm" (Wely) at the Basilica last week. One of them swears it gave him a cold. — That family bathing at New Plymouth is causing dissension. Mrs. Pomsonby-Potts refuses to take her children into the same sea that is washing over the not hyphenated Grabb family. — That, according to a lady journalist, who 1 has gone Home again, "the only Australians known in the Old Country are Madame Melba and Mr. Seddlon." Kindly note the order of precedence. — That hotel expenditure on furnishings and renovations in very many quar ters is hung up till Boniface or his landlord sees how the cat jumps on the 6th. If it jumps right, tradesmen are expecting big orders. — That Minister Mills, according to the chairman of one of his Marlborough meetings, was once the best shearer in that part of the country. Hadn't previously believed that he could "fleece" anything or anybody. — Thatt ai political candidate commenced his oration the other evening with "Ladies and gentlemen, I will be honest " and the tremendous applause that greeted the sentiment showed that the people appreciated the turning over of that new leaf. — That this is verbatim a "wanted" clipped 1 from a Southern paper. — "Wanted, ploughman and cattleman, Irish or Trench preferred ; no high educated or footballers inclined wanted." Fancy anybody in the cow industry daring to think of football ! — That, a propos of the suggestion that the New Zealand footballers) at Home only want a couple of men to complete two teams to show the Homelanders an undiluted game of New Zealand football. What price Manager Dixon and "Jimmy" Duncan to complete the sides? — That ladies who have been and gone and got married since last election wouldn't think of letting their maidten names as well as their marrieu names appear on the roll , would they? Alleged elsewhere that there are scores of cases of this sort. It might squash a local option poll, on the ground of informality.

— That Waihi wanted that railway all right. The Waihi mine spends £1000 a day in wages — and l the "diva" go Home. — That Outten and 1 Steel is the rather appropriate style of a new butchery film advertising in the near distance. — That several papers publish th.3 particulars of "Murder and suicide — by Electric Telegraph." These laboursaving devices again ! — That cinematograph films of th*» New Zealand-Scottish, football match a-ie already on the way to this country. The wide-awake West, of course. — That this is the time of year when you begin to think up all th& peopie you don't care twopence for, so that you may send them Christmas cards. — That this is the choicest advertisement of the week — "Would any lady of means ca.re to marry a poor, crowded out clerk, aged 37 p Apply," etc. — That "you are convicted and discharged, but if you come' before me again I shall make it double," was the J.P. sentence in a recent inebriety casp. — That' Wullie McLean says he Is going to knock ex-Mayor Aitken endways at the. general election. Wullie has seen his astral body sitting in the House. — That the poor little Bisley riflers will have to eat out theur hearts for a year and a-half . Too bad to have to work again. Why not pension the riflers off? — That a Southern spieler was charged with having robbed" a reporter of 255. The only remarkable, thing about the case is that the reporter had 25s to be robbedl of. — That one of the "spots" on the face of the sun at this moment 's 25,000 ft. through. Has. Mr. Sol tried our celebrated complexion lotion, eiehteenpence a bottle ; large size, 2s 6d? — That crystal-gazing, palm-reading, psychometricaJ ladiesi d'on't deceive their clints half as much as the clients deceive themselves. If there were no "jays" there would l be no one to pluck them. — That the rumour that the Polic» Commissioner had been approached bv an American firm to allow policemen' 4*4 * backs to be used as hoardings for r> new breakfast food advertisement « no to be relied on. — That a thrill passedl through th« breasts of Mastertonians the other day when three ladies, wearing trou — that is, "divided skirts," rode their hacks through that city. Why should so sensible a thing thrilJ people 9 — That Betts came with a Cropper on to the Hutt racecourse the other day Mr. Betts is a steward) of the Austrian Jockey Club, and Mr. Cropper ■> > secretary of the Kalgoorli© Racing Club. Quaint combination of names !