All Sorts Of People

Free Lance, Volume VI, Issue 277, 21 October 1905, Page 3

All Sorts Of People

Tl/I^ R - Gtow > tlie amial:)le l w>st ' the \ JTI Central Hotel, who went to search for the sunken Elingamite's sea- washed gold, is back again, in Wellington, smacking of the briny, and with a much larger idea of life than he ever had before. He says that the cruise of the Emma Sims to the Three Kings was fruitless, or rather goldless. After battling for seventeen direary days agaanst head winds and gales, the great rocks off the nose-tip of New Zealand were reached, only to find that the bad weather they had encountered so much of was worse, if anything, up there, and nothing could be done but beat about and shelter — shelter and beat about. Nothing attempted, nothing done ! * * * It/must have been terribly annoying ifo/& man of energy like Mr. Gow to be cooped up day after day withan the bulwarks of the Emma Sims, but it gave him a taste of ocean life that he is not likely to forget, and he comes back looking the picture of health, witih his capacious diaphragm considerably reduced. "For the liver," says A. M. G., "take a month's trip to the Three Kings in a schooner — pale people's pills are not in it with the cure." The weather was persistently bad, and 1 Mr. Gow is seriously wondering whether the sea at the West King — where the wreck lies — is ever oalm enough to permit of diving operations. Will he have another try? He does not know, and, not knowing, cannot say. /" . /And thas is how Mr. Gow was cured Vf seasickness. After the Emma Simt> stood out to sea from. Wellington, she also stood on her head, to show her acrobatic proclivities. Mr. Gow straightway clutched himself trouind the belt, and thought of the cosy back bar in the Central. Then he groaned, and gave up what he had and himself for lost. He locked the boat with his turbulence foT two days, and, as he was about to make his last will and testament (to be sealed in a three-star bottle, and thrown overboard), the gallant Leagh — the bravest and best. — saw how matters stood. "Get out of that! Get on deck!" said he sternly. "Can't move," whispered Gow ; "go away and leave me to die!" "Rats'" said Leigh, in effect, and thereupon pushed and dragged the great man up on deck, and lashed him to some gear where the salt spray could play upon his clammy brow. ♦ ♦ • \^Then, he secured 1 a bottle of lemonsquash, emptied it into a bucket, poured on top a gallon of hot water, and offered Gow a pannikinful. A. M. swallowed it down. Leigh, the p©isistent, gave him another, and that also, like the first, rose with the lark. Same treatment again, until finally the hydraulic gear got tired, the diaphragm ceased to heave, and! Mr. Gow began to take some interest in life again. A few hours later he wais pacing the deck inhaling gjreat gulps of ozone in a manner calculated to pi event the sails drawing any at all. He was right, felt that he could climb the mast, and ate ravenously. Eureka! He was cured. This cure has been patented by Mr. Gow in every civilised country, so beware you quacks !

The Tourist Department has been advised of the advance on New Zealand of two young ladies in bloomers 1 These are Miss Lovella Comley and! Miss Aim a Pinch, two lady journalists, of Chicago, who have set out on a five years' tour of the world, attuned in, black silk bloomers and tailored cravenette suits, replete with pockets and' other conveniences. They had reached! San Francisco last month, and from there were to sail for the Hawaiian Islands, the Philippines, Borneo, Australia, and New Zealand. » * ♦ After leaving this colony, they invade successively India, Persia, Egypt, Italy, Spain, Norway, and Russia. Then, if they have not been snapped l up by some high-born hidalgo or passionate grand duke, they will return to the great pork centre. They carry credentials from the mayor and! chief postmaster of Chicago, and have been engaged by several papers to send progress reports from time to time. For this purpose they carry a typewriter and two cameras. The chief allurement about these Chicago belles is that they wear black silk bloomers! This raises a hop© that is, however, dashed to the ground when it is stated that they wear knee-high boots — a cruel qualification. Be it known to 1 all that Miss Conies is twenty-five, and Miss Pinch twenty-two years of age. * * • Little Thomas Trowell, the young 'cellist who so brilliantly won the Brussels Ooncour a few months ago, writes to Mr. T. Trowell, of Wellington,, that a splendid engagement was thrown at him shortly after his musical Waterloo, an engagement to play a concerto with the great Kursaal Orchestra, tat Ostend — the sort of thing that even Kubelik, Gerardy, and players of that stamp do not turn up their noses at. * * « Young Trowell, who was, and is stall, m Brussels (though not at the Conservatoire), was unable to accept, firstly because his instrument was not good enough, — did not have the strength of tone to stand up against an orchestra of one hundred and thirty performers — and secondly because he was not feeling rery well. It is hard to know how to remedy the inadequate 'cello part of the business, for they ask such a thundering big price for a real tip-top musicbox in the knowing Old World, and the young man will simply have to win has way to such a treasure by the power that is in him. * * * Master Garnet, whom Thomas describes as "the dearest, most self-sacri-ficing fellow in the world," is making excellent progress with the violin, and his double harmonics are said to be a treat to hear. Thomas has composed a "conceito m B minor," sa that he has three strings to his bow — a "star" 'cellist, composer, and musical critic and writer. And none of tins is laid on with a Trowell. * * • Mr. Ye>iex, the apostle of pure poldannounced that he would begin to knock spots off "Tommy" Wilford's chances on Thursday evening of last week. The Mayor threatened to preside, and, in fact, did preside over a gathering of about one hundred and fifty Huttites. The night was dark and stormy, and the American gentleman didn't show up thiough thei rain at 8 o'clock or at any time thereafter that evening. But, the meeting did some business after all. It passed a vote of censure. It had previously been thought that Mr. Yerex cared naught for the elements, but that if he had a leaning to liquid of any kind it was water — and it did rain amdl no error. What about Mr. Yerex's " sunshine or tornadoes I will be there at 8 p.m." Fancy sunshine at 8 p.m. ! Should have been "moonshine" or tornadoes, eh?

\Mr- J. Charlesworth, whio designed the Town Hall, and knows the taste of Yorkshire puddling, is back again in Wellington, after an eaght months' absence on. the other side of the globe. A sad occasion called him to England twothirds of a year ago — the illness of his father — and, sadder still, .he only reached Yorkshire in time to be present at his parent's death. It was a harrowing home-coming indeed, and! Mr. Charlesworth will have plenty of local sympathy. • • ♦ went Home via America, but, as he simply dashed through as rapidly as possible, the States is somewhat of a higgeldy-piggeldy memory. He saw a good deal of the Old Country, revived hisi memory of the many beautiful and interesting places in "f bonniest and t' best caanty," and enjoyed a fleeting trip across the Contineaut on his way to catch the mailboat at Naples. The traveller looks the picture of health, and feels able and wullin' to erect fifty Town Halls — if the demand arises. • • * Another blow to Wellington! Mr. Richard Mason, a visitor from New South Wales to Wellington, has got back to Gooloongabba (1). He writes to the Gooloongabba "Beacon," remarking that the business bethods of Wellington are "extremely advanced, and the people possessed of remarkable commercial intelligence and integrity. I would advise (he continues), however, that the New South Wales Government abolish capital punishment, and send its criminals to live the everyday life of Wellington. The climate is several degrees worse than the hangman's rope. Death is far preferable." It seems to us that Mr. Mason exaggerates. • • • Mr. Daniel C. Nugent, of St. Louis city, Louisiana, has sent along his illustrated itinerary, just to say that he and Mrs. Daniel C. and the gal and boys are coming right along to visit New Zealand. He is not modest — is Mr. Nugent ! The notification that he is to leave such and such a place on such and such a date, arriving elsewhere just then and no other time, is printed most exquisitely as a tiny brochure, with pretty little photographs of the places they intend to visit. • * * It would worry most people on tour to be tied down to dates, but Mr. Nugent has committed himself in his booklet (and the world is just waiting hard to see Daniel C. and his family), amd therefore his head would rest uneasy if any one of them ever missed a steamer, tram, train, or a joke. This gentleman must dote on punctuality — but it must worry the members of the family. He is coming along in the Sonoma — but what is the use of any information. The brochuire gives it all. It even indicates to friends at Home where his correspondenice shall be forwarded to. The new gent, is gilded, so hail ! • • • Premier "Tommy" Bent, of Victoria, has instituted a somewhat effective method of receiving deputations. A large number of ladies the other day called on him with a large number of grievances about their downtroddenness and their disabilities and their serfdom and all that sort of thing. The spokeswoman of the deputation had been speaking for about two minutes when the Premier snuggled dlown into has "saddleback," and went to sleep. For two hours and anhalf the ladies put their little programme before him. and, when they were exhausted, the spokeswoman woke him up, and him if he had anything to say. < 'No ! he yawned ,and went to sleep agam. As the deputation went down the stairs, a terrific roar of laughter was heard from the Premier's dien.

'■The Mayor — that\» he — where? That side? Oh, here sidel" This is not municipal madness, but it was the manner in which the Reverend Shamasha Stephen, of that Christian, body, the Nestorian Church i of Kurdistan, Chaldea (Asia Minor), enquired for the Mayor. I held him close in oonvesrsatLon before someone blurted out that the Mayor was elsewhere — pursuing an elector up the Brooklyn hill oil his motor car. Somebody might have said anything, for rapid English, or what passes for it, was past Deacon Stephen. • • • "And' where do you come from?" "Where, yes," said! ,he, in an Oriental, noncommittal manner. "Yes, where?" we said. ''Which country — what place?" "Yes; Ashamine!" "Oh, yes, Asia Minor; but where?" "Kurdistan, yes, Jukmerque!" We were beginning to tine rapidly, the pedalling was so hard. "What are you doing here?" He brightened at this, the question evidently being a familiar one. "Yes; build the school — Kurdistan — Christian, like you, yes!" We said "Yes," to break the monotony. • * * "What religion you, eh, yes?" "Church of England," we replied. "Just the same me, yes !" "And you want money to build, the schools?" "Yes, same you — co-lect money !" Yes, yes, we thought, brothers of the cloth, the same as we — tdie long, black coat iand the outstretched hand. "How long has your Church been established?" we asked. "Since Jesus!" he replied, with a suddenness that somehow shocked. "St. Thomas — he one, yes: oh before Engleesih Church — long time." Then the Mayor came, glanced' at them with a sigh, and told them to follow him — 'and they cast diowa their nets and followed him. Rockefeller, from whom "oil" blessings flow, has such trouble with his liver that all hisi money cannot do much good for it. "Rocky" has been ordered, to paddle about barefooted every morning for an hour, and he is to be seen at it most religiously. Rockefeller is not only bare-headedt— -he is as bald! as a table-top — and bare-faced, but he is also now bare-footed. • • * Geo. E. Butler, son of Doublebasso Butler, of McGregor Wrights, and one of New Zealand's foremost artists, has decided to do battle with fickle fortune in England once more, and to that end has taken up his residence in the Old Country. He left this colony by the Morayshire some weeks ago, and is now in the thick of making arrangements for permanent settlement in country parts where the landed proprietor is called "the Squire" or "Maister" or "Sur!" and one dare not knock over a rabbit for very fear of/the 'aforesaid Square's dread anger. v . Mr. Butler has secured) a place in the village of Weedon, three miles from Aylesbury (where the ducks come from), in Bucks (the peculiar abbreviation for Buckinghamshire, a dreadful word, but just as ridiculous as Hants, standing for Hampshire). We may as well call Wellington "Welts," Canterbury "Cants," and) Otago "Oats," which latter would be peculiarly a, p*opos. Anyhow, George has in. Bucks, about thirty miles from London, and there intends to buck in tot Ms, oily but artistic life's work in, earnest. Mr. Butler is missed 1 from the show that opened at the. Art Gallery on Saturday last, but admirers of his clever work need not despair, for has father is a picture-dealer, and) will be able to supply anyone with a typical English painting — say, "Sunset at SloptonHm-the-Slosh," by Butler, at a reasonable figure. We wish him commissions without end.

great vivid soul has passed to the vague Beyond in. the remarkable personality of Sir Heniry Irv.ng, actor and gentleman. Mr. Irvmg did not enter the profession backed by influence and money, as have many latter-day "stars," w!bo twinkle mostly on the "hoardings and in their own imagination. He was predestined for the stage, but only achieved the greatest success by years and years of hard, earnest study and grim experiences in the old grimy and penurious days of "stock" companies. But, though physically not robust, he possessed 'an indomitable spirit, and the highest ideals, which he lived to see carried out. What more could a man desire P * * /Henry Irving was the only son of Samuel Brodribb, and was born, an the village of Kemton, Somersetshire, in February 6th, 1833. He made his finst appearance in London m a s.x-line pant in "Ivy Hall," at the Princess Theatre, on September 24th, 1859, but, disgusted at his parts, decided to ireturn to the provinces until he oould "do himself proud" m the metropolis. It was at the Queen's Theatre, Lorog Acre, that he was finst associated with Miss Ellen Terry, but it was not until he induced Batenran to produce "The Bells," at the Lyceum, in November, 1871, that he became famous. His portraiture of Matthias, the quiet old Germain, who is haunted by the jingle of the sleighbells, was one of the greatest efforts of intensely dramatic acting ever seen on any stage. Irving was made, and other successes followed naturally. / * yMr. Irvmg became .remarkable for lils dramatic readings. His first at>tempt is worth recording. He, with Edmund Saker, made arrangements to give a reading of "The Lady of Lyons," at Linlithgow, and, in Irvmg's own words • "The day came which was to make or mar us quite. I felt a thrill of pride at seeing my name for the first time in bi^ capitals on the postens which announced that at 8 o'clock precisely Mr. Henry Irving would read 'The Lady of Lyons.' This was highly satisfactory, and gave us an excellent appetite for a frugal tea. At the hotel , we eagerly questioned the waiter as to the probability of there being a rush. He pondered some time, as if calculating the rush, but we could set no other answer from him than : 'Nane can tell.' <-** 'Did he think that the throng would be so great that the Provost would have to be summoned to keep order? 'It was no at a' unlikely!' was "the reply. Eight o'clock drew near, and we sallied out to survey the scene of operations. The crowd had not yet begun to collect in front of the Town Hall, and the man with the key was not there. As it was getting late, and we were afraid of keeping the crowd waiting, we went m search of the door-keeper. We found him quietly reposing in the bosom of has family, and, to our remonsitranoe, replied! : 'Ou, aye, the readdn 5 ! I forgot a' aboot it!' This was not inspiriting, but we put it down to harmless ignorance. / * "The door was opened, the gas was lighted, and my manager made the most elaborate preparations for taking the money. He had even provided himself with change in case some opulent citizen of Linlithgow should come with nothing less than half-a-sovereign. While he was thus energetically applying himself to business, I was strolling like a casual spectator on the other side of the street, taking some last feverish glances at the hall, and anxiously watcdring for the rush. The time wont on. The town clock struck eight, and the manager counted and re-count-ed the change of that half-sovereign. "Halfpast eight, and not a soul to be seen — not even a small boy! It was clear that nobody intended to come, and I could not read to an audience consisting of the manager, with a face as long as two tragedies, so there was nothing for it but to beat a retreat. We managed to scrape enough money together to pay expenses, which operation was a sore trial to my speculative manager, and a pretty severe tax upon the emoluments of the juvenile lead. We voted Linlithgow a dull place, still wrapped up in mediaeval slumber, and therefore insensible to the charms of poetic drama." ♦ ♦ ♦ Premier Rason, of Westralia, opens his mouth only when he has something to say. What he says is short and sharp, and very decided. Here is a sample : — "If you ask of me preference for unionists you won't get it ; if you ask for the removal of a judge when his decisions do not please you, you will ask in vain. If at the poll you dtefeat one of my colleagues, you defeat me. In that event I shall ask Hisi Excellency for a dissolution, and I shall expect to get it."

7 ~ v/Colonel Robin, C.8., officer commanding the Otago District, was, it wall be remembered, the commanding ofiicer ot the First New Zealand Contingent, and, as to-morrow (Saturday) is Trafalgar Day, and the anniversary of the departure of the first troops for Africa, we are just reminding you about it, "Lest ye forget." Ot the two hundred and twelve men who went to Africa with, what was known, in 1900 as "the" New Zealand Contingent, twenty-three have "gone under," and to-night (Friday), at the annual dinner of the First New Zealand Mounted Rifles' Association, the "Roll of Honoured Dead" will be read. • » ♦ . Officers and non-coms, of the "First" have done pretty well. Colonel R. H. Davies, C.8., one of the keenest soldiers now in New Zealand, saw miuch service with the "First" and afterwards, and us now commaiidiia'g. the Auckland District. Major Bartlett, D.5.0., runs a big farm and a carnage factory outside Johannesburg. Captain Johnson is in official life in Pretoria, aimd Captain "Jacky" Hughes, D.5.0., is inspecting officer of cadets in New Zealand. Major DArcy Chaytor, who was, with the last two-named, a subaltern with the "First," is still a keen volunteer, and is now in England,, on a visit, and Captain Canavan follow® business pursuits in Blenheim. >/ * ul the non-coms., Reg. Sergeantmajor Rogers is staff-ins oructor at Auckland ; Troop Sergt.-majore Oardale and Burr are now permanent mounted instructors, with the rank of sergeantmajor ; and Sergeants Grant, Morgan, and Tuck have a like rank and like billets. In fact, the "First" was fairly well looked after in many respects. By the way, that splendid soldlier, Major Madocks — also a "First" — who married Sir Walter Buller's daughter, is in the Staff College at Home. Captain "Bob" Matthews is at Cheltenham. (England) , and we must not forget Lieut. "Mick" Lindsay, now adjutant of the 7th Dragoon Guards, or Private George Miller, now an officer of the Royal Field Artillery. Another "First" private who got a commission was Matson, who seems to have quite cut adrift from this end of the earth. . * * * Achin', M.H.R., had an important engagement with a wire-wove mattrass the other night, and intimated to Mr. Barber, M.M.H., his intention of leaving the House early. The latter gentleman induced his friend to stay a little longer, under promise that he would run him home on his motor car. At midnight, they boarded the car. but had only proceeded a couple of hundred yards when something went wrong with the "underneaths," and Mr. Barber groped about amongst wheels . and oil for a time until the wrong was righted, and then off they went again, but only for another quarter of a mile, when "Bang" she went again. When last seen, the pair were pushing the car along Featherston-street and into the yard at the back of the old Coun-

oil Chambers, in that thoroughfare. All motor-car vendors are duly notaved that Mr. Achm', M.H.R., knot achin' to buy. • • * Prmce Ferdinando, of Savoy, who is to visit Wellington next month, is a Lieutenant on the cruiser Oalabria. He is twenjty-^two years of age, amiable, and good-looking, wears an up-turned moustache, number six boots, but not his heart upon his sleeve. Wherefore, oh ladies, look out!