All Sorts of People

Free Lance, Volume V, Issue 256, 27 May 1905, Page 3

All Sorts of People

Thomas Lock, of Goie, was in 'IVI Wellington th s week, paying his. first visit to the Empue City. On the bowling greens of the South, Tom's reputation ah, a skip stands second to none. And his leputation as a real good fellow, who uevei blows lus own trumpet, i» just as high a-s his ability to draw the blliot or smafch up a head. If you have seen a goodlooking, quiet, well set-up stranger strolling about the streets, with a pair of gold-mmmed glasses sittrr astride hits nose, the chances are even that it wa^ Tom Look. * * * V/'The strangest tiling about him is that, although he has lived all lus twentynme years inside the colony, he never once was on thei sea untal lie boarded the Waikare for Wellington on Friday night last. He was bom on the shores of Lake Wakatipu, and at fifteen yearfc aid took to bowls and' Rugby football. Bowls tan in the family, and the virus of football to in the New Zealand atmosphere. Nisbet Moßobie, who now manages a department m the "New Zealand Time»," was then a Southland representative, and under his auspices youns Tom Lock came out and performed so stoutly that they took the oue from bis name and made him "look" of their re<p. &crum r>aek. * * stopped kicking the bail when he eineiged a^ a Benedict, and he began to give all his spare time to the family failing of bowls instead. At the Dunednn tournament, two years ago, Usher and Lock (good names both) earned off the Champion Pairs. At the Christ church tournament in January laofc Tom Lock again, piiiyed a btroag hand m all dvnsionw (rinks, pairs, and singles), and only hard luck and the fortune of war k&pt him out of the prize-list. But it ua-> not long before he came to light again. # "** * At Easter last they had a tournament at Invercargill. and the offer of prizes to the value of £50 for a championship rink content drew the nick of the bowlers from all parts of Ot ago and Southland. Tom Lock went down from Gore with a team consisting: of O J Wilson D. Dewar, W. P. Oraig, ana himself and carried off the big prizes with an unbeaten record, winning his entme seven matches. In the first round he knocked out Snaddon, tshe era ok Dunedin skip. Harm, an Invercargrill schoolmaster (you can't keep the dominies away from bowls), skipped the runners-up. //We have =<a>id there us a strong bias foi bowls in the Lock family. Listen Some few years back the father of the family was supposed' to be on his death-bed. The sons were sent for to fl oe the la.sf of him When Tom arrived the old man roused) hnmself up. Fp brckomed Tom to the bedi=dde. With diffioultv h© cleared his throat, aid said: "There's a paragraph in the 'Witness' saying that the Sanders fam<W (father and three sons) will bowl any other family in the nrovinr*e. Take up that challenge, Tom I'll ~et well and we'll play them, mv hoy'" Thit paragraph was eood medioir-e, for he still lives. Mr. Lock, iun recently out of his business in &ore, and has been up to see wh*t nro^nect* the EmpiTe Oitv ofFers. The local bowler* o'-e anxious to run him in as one of themselves.

\jtfr. F. S. klson, a youthful sea on of the Elson faanily, whose head dispenses diugs in Courtenay Place, has recently qualified himself for the licensed production ot the nuxtuie — shake the bottle before taking." The new cbemivt ls a Blenheim boy who however, gained his educational knowledge at Wellington's Terrace School, and drifted thence to his father's chemist's shop, and afterwards to Mewsns. Bairaud and Sans, where, for four years, he pestled and mortal ed and lived the aiomati'c Me of the budding pill-poundiei . * * • Fied hd,s pounded other things than pulls, for he is an energetic Jeathei kiicken, playing a -skilful game of sockei for the Swift>, a club that has one of the biggest memberships m New Zealand, and whose seniors have had to be drvul>ed> into tw o sections, "A" and! • B " Fred captained the juniors last veai, but has gone up higher thiw year, amd will captain the busy Bees. He i« a fresh- faced, popular vounig fellow, with a bright smile and a hopeful outlook on life. Perhaps, he'll be absorbed' temporarily m the near future by Britain's metropolitan whirlpool with the intention of getting; all the knowledge of drags that London can give. He doesn't know yet, anyhow. His joyous appearance is proof that he has never yet used ansenic in mistake for boric acid, or strychnine instead, of toothpowder. Good luck to you anyhow Fied' About fifty friends met Fred at God'ber's last Tuesday and gave him a glad welcome and a hearty time. * ♦ * Laid and Lady Plunket travel quite a deal bv motor-car. They pop into places where perhaps a Plunket photo has never reached). The other day the party stopped before a large building whioh had been once a hotel before it was "reduced." An aide popped off, and asked if the house was a hotel. The lady said it wasn't, and continued . ' I see as you're playing 'East Lynne tonight at the ball. You might keep me three front seats will you?" The aide put up his monocle, and fioze the lady until the humour of the situation tickled him nearly to d'eatlh. * * * Hie hadn't heard suoh a good tiling, bai Jove, since he was with the — ahold wegiment in — aw — Indiaw, doncherknow. He returned solemnly to the motor-car, and asked Lord Plunket if he would play "East Lynne" to oblige a lady, and the vice-regal party chuckled oonsumedly. Anyhow, the identity of the party was disclosed. If this was a yarn in a Home paper that w oman would have turned pale and curtseyed for several hours in dreadful humility Instead 1 , shie replied- "Oh, that's the Governor, is it?" and went out and shook him bv the hand and asked him if he wanted! to buy a tvarrot she had in stock? The purchase was made and it is to be sincerely hotted 1 that the oaii rot. — which ik. a talker — will be good enouieh to select only those words from its vocabulauy which are permitted in r>ohte swiety a 6a 6 - it Ifated that tih© bo«irdinfr-ihoui=e has had several bullock-driving boarders * * * Old "Charlie" Pressman is gone Everybody remembers the stuidv old fellow amd his old boat, the Maoai, beached at Pinitea Pount far lons' enouisih. Years a^one he was a master lighterman, but the breaking; uid of his boat knocked him out oif the busmen and he took to wha.rf labo<unnio\ Charlie was a nuaint dhamcter, and since hi* accident on the railway four or five years aero became lews, physically able The old fellow* was e'erhtv-five years of aor,a Yenvs aero a lacal oron- of the ""Rpa-rr»it's" brought under h ; s notice "DavirT Co^nerfield." and the "=,torv of Pecraottv'-s- boat. "Si mo «ort of t ho n '=e as voui '« Cbirhe'" t^p co'iv. "TTm yes but there ain't no T ifHp Km'lv and there am ; t no Mrs Gummidee — trlory be to God'"

M,i . Julius Knight, the actor who first introduced us to Maicus baiperbus, aaia al&o to "Everyinaji," has struck band luck an the other side. He was busy preparing for the hero part in "His Majesty's Servant," a roniaaitic costume diaima, of the time of the Second Charles, when typhoid laid violent hands upon him He fougiht against it, but had to give in. As a matter of fact, the doctors told hum that he ■-hoiuld have been in bed while he was still on the stage, and his final appearance before he was compelled to give up *• honed that he was isoiifermg. He is> now m a private hospital in Sydney, and Hairry Phmmer, brother of Harcus, is playing Julius's role in "If I Were Kins:" as if to the ma,nner born. * * * Mi. A. L. D. Fiaser, M.H.R., us an ardent Napiente and wired the Premier dfurimg that gentleman's mflueaiiza bout to go to Napier, anid enjoy "the rejuvenating influence of its famous suinbabhs. During the worst part of Mr. Seddon's attack Wellington weathei out-Napiered Napier. The festive microbe i> just as busy in the sun as in the shade, however, and 1 , although Napier may be perennally sunny, Mr. Duttaie will tell anyone that Wellington is the most beautiful place in New Zealand. * * * John Evans has been well-known to the police for many years. What have they fouind out about tine chief clerk of the Department since 'he retned in December last? That the kmdlv giray-haired, gentJe Welshman has so grown into the heart of tihe service that he was worth many sincere expressions of esteem, and! a purse of sovereigns sipontaiiieouisly suibsoribed by the police throuighiomt New Zealand. A"d Joihn Evans, who has retired to Wakefield to live the rest of his days, is prouder of that illuminated) address, done in the skilful Book's best style, than of anything els© conmected with liis. long police career.

Evans tells us, in genitily-spoJken accents, that he was, long, loaug ago, a sailor, who ploughed the mighty deep, and let go the anchor am New South Wiles in 1862 to follow the gold rushes. He didn't follow them more tlian a few months, and, coming to New Zealand in the first flush of early mamhood, he found work right to his hand. Joining the 2nd Waikato Regiment, he suffered the trials and tribulations of the early-day militiaman. As a member of the armed loanstabulary he worked under the famous Yon Tempsky in the West Coast campaign. ♦ • ♦ CJ&nTe^oort duty guarding supplies, tihe party were attacked by the enemy, wiho were using double-barrelled fowhngpieoes, loaded to the muzzle with slugs, and Enfields and Minies throwing half-an-oumoe of lead. He carries an interesting relic m his body now in the shape of a Maori bullet. There were no X Rays in those days. Badly wounded as he was, he was ilaoed on sick pay. w h eh he drew for three years before he ■was again fit for service, and re-lomed th" A.C. Then, having reached the rank of sergeant, he was transferred to the police office as clerk. * * * Fourteen years ago, when Mr. Fox (who now resides in Tuinakori-Toiad) re1 nquis-hed the position of cMef clerk to t«hp Department. Mr. Evains was promoted to the place, wfoioh he held wth ciedit to "himself and satisfaction to the Department until the end of la«.t Mr. Evans, whose modlesty is proverbial, says the general expressions of esteem he has received from his comrades, and their handsome reoo £" nition. came as quite a surprise. Ai-» thouo-h failing health was the chief crn^e of h^ retirement, 'he assures us tli at the climate of Wabefield has been so p-ood a tonic that he was never better than at present.

ihe Ministry has been defeated, and the Premier has now retired 1 to the cool shade of the Opposition. Who aaad, '•Poor old Diok?" You mistake us. The Premier was Mr. Holmes seioretaiy of the V.M.C.A., and we're talking about the Union Parliament. The political giant, Holmes, had been so satisfied with the policy of his government that he thought W> could! let things slide with advantage to his perspinng country, so wnen, at the last sitting of the Parliament, the leader of the Opposition ~* r r H. P. Richmond, 8.A., LL.B.) made a frenzied! attack, and the attack was supported by bis colleague, Mr. Morgan, both of whxxra clearly showed that the government had ruimed the country the moving of a want-of-confidence upset the government, and the leader of the Opposition will form a Ministry. (^- * * * ' Premier" Holmes, in replying tot the stinging taunts of the soulless Opposition, lay down his portfolio with a smile, acknowledging that the very finest thing that could happen to a Parliament was to have an Opposatdon which cotuild beat a Government. Mr. J. G. Harkness. ex-M.H.R.. is the new Speaker, and Mr. John M. Stott, clerk of the Hou**e. It is interesting to note that there is no "Bellamy's" in this Parliament, and that the coming social wrangle will be wrangled) on a teetotal basK There are seventy new members this 1 year. • * • Mr. Glidden, the stout Yankee millionaire, who glided t'hiough this country on a motor car not long since, remarks, with great fervour, in an American paper — " No trip round the world is> complete with New Zealand omitted." New Zealanders will be glad to know defintely that this volcanic speck is really in tlie world. Also, that no map of America is complete without the molusaon of the United 1 States, and that no motor-car can mote without wheels. We're always learning something or other — especially other. ■* * * Mr. G. H. Reid, Pr.zne Minister of Australia, got luto hot water the other day by asserting in his own country that New Zealand had greater natural advantages than Australia. The meeting roaretj in derision. But wihen the meeting was told by Georgie that New Zealand had a splendlid d'emioorat in Mr. Richard Seddou, who was one of the greatest men in the Empire, the people cheered. 'Tt's a pity," yellted one man, ''we can't get the loan of him fora bit!" * * v^The Rev. J. S. McCulkigh, "elder :n charge of New Zealand" on' behalf of Zion. the headquarters of Mr. Dowie T may be an excellent man, of course, but his public utterances leave a little to be desired. Judge ye. The churches — except Zion, of course — are, according to Mr. McCullagh, lar^eJv composed .jl •'drunkards, smokers, chewer®, and spittens." Doctors are "professional vaiga^ bonds" or "professional scoundrels," and also "enemies of the human race." Ministers of other denominations — not in Zion' — are partly, or mostly, "ungodly scoundrels." ♦ * • ( From the flowers of speech with which tJjie "'Elder-iai-oiharge" bedecked hus address we oull tihe following exotic specimens, fragrant with all their native parity • "Do you sutraos© we are going to howl to God 1 for a lot of incarnate devils?" "Do you suppose that the Almighty Father wishes his truth to go beg^ine; of every filthy, dirty, stinking devil in the street «"' "Blessed! are the meek, for they Shall inherit the earth. 1 ' Presumably, apostles of Zion andl his Eldetr-in-obamge are getting their inheritance bv that virtue. The kindly references above refer to New Zealainders. New Zealanders should love Mr. McCullagh.

Governor Plunket lias been firing oft anothci little anecdote fiom lut> exteusave collection. Tlns> time it relates to General Booth The aged wairioi was addressing a big meeting dawn South, and, at. the Governoi \\ as in the ohan , of course ail the goody-goody people of the place made a. point of being present and fiihng up the trout seats. After the General had closed hits impassioned address, Ills Excellency leant over to him and said "Well, General, you have had a most successful meeting." 'Quite true," nas the reply, "but these peopJe fancy themselves the wamts, and I want to leach the sinners'" * • * Bland Holt, the weU-known comedian with the oh-iipy little chuckle, is out with, the very latest idea in. post-caids. He has s^it to a cartoonist, who poitiays the familiar bland features in the form of a mask minus the mose. The nose space us cut out, and when you follow the directions, "I hope you nose me," and' fit the opening on to your nasal promonton , the effect is mo^t comical As the post-card craze is stiang in New Zealand, the effect of this par may be imagined. Bland Holt's lettei-box will be quickly filled up when the next few mails from New Zealand get to Melbourne. You have not forgotten Miss H. Loiraine Tansley? Anyone who has heaid her sweet voice and tasteful execution in 'If All the Stars Were Mine," and ballads of that clas->, will not readily lose recollection of her. Well, she hat> lus-t become engaged. No, iiiot for hfe. Her present engagement ls with the Steel-Payne concert troupe, and the tour, which will be an extended one, will probably include South Africa. Miss Tansley will be much mussed f > om the concert halls- of New Zealand], but her numerous friends will hope to t=ee her mount ra>pidlv tlie ladder of fame. The people of Dainneivirke where her home i« have just exiwessed their good wishes in a purse of sovereigns. * * * Mr. Massey doesn't favour the abohtiom of the ''tote " because he thinks it i> less of an evil than the"bookie." If Mr Massey can prove that there are half-a-dozen less "bookies" in New Zealand now than there were before the licensed gambling machine undermined the moi als of the country he has a good case. But, he can't prove it. * * * Raconteur Golden told some good yarne during his season m Wellington. One Wc\& about the usual three men, presumably English, Irish, amdi Scotch. They were fnendo and gamblers, and had all buist up thear little pile at Asoot. They foregathered on the benches in the park to disouis> the situation, and form a committee of ways and means. Said the Englishman "Aw — I — ah — may be temporarily embarrassed, dioncherknow, but Ive — aw — wired to the governor for a hundred pounds'" Said the Scofcumian ''Ah ken weel ma siller's gone, but ahve written to ma uncle for two huninerd poondls'l" Said Ca«ey "Bedadi, it's sorra a omt have 01 at all, at all But it's more money than either c<f yez 01 11 be gettiv- Here's a letther oi've written for a thousand pounds but who the divil to send! it to is what bates me. * * # Mass Helen Wilder us the only feanale "policeman," and polices Honolulu. She is a mounted "trap," but history doesn't say if she's 1 ever caught anything. She'll passably catch a man later. She doesn't get ptud, because she is tremendously rrah. The reason foi Helen's love for the palnce is possibly because she wears the sweetest duck of a grey hat, with a pretty silver badge, and a love of a navy-blue skirt, and a perfectly rapturous salver-mount-ed revolver with an ivory handle. Perhaps, Helen arrests inebriated firemen, two at a time. Perhaps, not. Or perhaps she gets the male Murphy to do the man>-ha,nd,Hng while she screams • ♦ * v Mr. John Hutcheson, who has recovered fiom his recent assassination by the press, said the other day that many of our public men who have served the city for fifteen or twenty years were allowed to refer© without n "good-bye." A propos of this is the pathetic case of poor old Joe Dransfield, an application for whose admission to the Victoria Home for Ohronic Invalids was before the Hospital Trustees last week. He, who is called plain Joe Dransfield even in the Council's own year-book, was mayor of this bustling city from 1870 to 1873, and filled a seat at the Council table from 1874 to 1877, when he resigned. The old man has been in a bad way for many moonfii, and is now said to be quite childish. It will not be charity to give Joe Dransfield a comfortable home and careful attention at the Home to be opened on Thursday next, and it should be the duty of the Trustees to se that he be kept free of redtapism that has made BumbHeofim so mud-stained 1 in some of our local institutions. Mayors of Wellington did not receive £400 a-vear in the "seven-t-es."

Minister Hall- Jones, on Mr. Sedtkxn'b scheme of harnessing the rivers in New Zealand, said. "The use of water vs> a burning question." AJI depends, of course, whether you take it neat or diluted wath ' bix-star." * * * John Rigg may take he&it of gracei, and another hold' of has "Tied Houi>e Bill." The Manx Homse of Keys has jusit abolished tied' houses, probalbly having seen a copy of the Lance contaiming a>n appreciation of at least one of John's efforts. * * # Wonder if Fred Param, of Petone, has ever seen the leader of the Opposition. liisteoi to Fred . — "Mr. Massey Lb a spaie man, rather over the medium height " etc., etc. If Mr. Massey is spare, Mr. Piram is portly. The leader of the Opposition us sft. lOin. in height, broad in the shoulders, light in the legs, weight 14st 31b, and wears size seven in nats and a 17m. collar. He may be "spare," of course, but it takes a keen eye to discover it. ♦ * * Mr. Wright, the Bible-anMsahools oiganisang orator, is reported to have had but indifferent success in. Auckland. He however, persuaded those who were already convmced Uncommonly like a. gathering of total abstainers taking the 'pledge." • • ♦ Rather startling to be told in cold print that Prophet Dowie was at one time partnered with Messrs. Archibald and Haynes, the foimders of the Sydney ''Bulletin." You remember Dowie'^ dreadful diatribes agaorust the press when he was last in Australia? Lord Iveagh's hear, the Hon. Rupeit Gruanness, against whom am action for breaoh-of -promise was brought by a lady, who lost it, married the eldest daughter of the Earl of Onslow, once Governor of New Zealand. Rupeit is not vet thirty-one, and is a rather unusual young man for the sotn of a peer That is to say. he is both a scholar and an athlete. At Eton and! Cambridge there were few indeed who could beat him at rowing, and he won numberless trophies, including the diamond sculls at HenJey in 1895, the same distinction the following year, as well as the miuohcoveted Wingfield Sculls. Rupert went to_ Africa as a non-combatant, with the Irish Hospital. The lady who sued him waited until he had been married for nearly two yeans before she brought the action. The Hon. Rupert, although the hope of the great brewing monarch, has never worked in pa's brewery.

Rockefeller, the oleaginous millionaire, waate to give £20,000 away to the missioiito, and the misguided Ameuican parsons don't think they aught to take it. Rockefeller, you see, made hib raomey out of trusts, and 1 the people iufferedj -as they must do i*n every case in which corners operate. The pardons seem to forget that if that £20,000, or any other sum offered, ixl dharity by any millionaire, isn't accepted, tihe money will be spent in tihe mare ignoble game of grab. By accepting moneys tendered by millionaires the people use tiie only means of getting back what ii> their own. "Oily" made his money from Americans, and when they get a snow they should get a little of it back. * * * Dr. Fiascha, whose oabiled opimion fioan Sydney that alcohol \vas> a good stimulant — of not abused — and that Australians should drink wine to meals, is a noteworthy medioail authority in Australia, and a muehr-hked man. Although a born colonial, he is of Italian parentage, and the Italians are par excellence the wine drunkens of Europe. liven th© poorest people drink win© and water, and very little tea, and tihe average Italian is a very fine fallow physically. He has several "festas" and sainW days am. a month, and he drinks more wnne then than usual, but be doesn't get drunk like the British beerchewer or the French absmtheur. * * Dr. Fiasohi oommanded the New South Wales Army Medhoal Corps in Africa, and earned great distinction for his skilful work and broad humanity. He and his A.M.C. were m such great request in the field that they were overworked, the result being a breakdown in tihe doctor's health. It is rather remarkable that most of the' best wine produced in Australia is exported, a good deal of it froing to France, whence it is sent to England in French-labelled bottles.