All Sorts of People

Free Lance, Volume IV, Issue 209, 2 July 1904, Page 3

All Sorts of People

j|»tHEN King Diok, rather pale, lAf and a we© bit " drawn "- ■*■* looking, faced the tumultuous cheers of a very large roomful of Wellington's most solid men, on his birth-night, the pressmen brought forth about two sheets of copy-paper It was necessary before King Dick had done, to despatch an urgent messenger for a oouple of reams. Mr. Seddon is emphatically not dead yet. He warmed up, and he felt great entirely. We imagine that when, at about 1.30 he "turned m," not to sleep, but to ponder on the kindness of his friends, he didn't feel "great" a little bit. He may have an iron constitution, but it isnt steel-plated and rivetted. Whf he said is history, of course. What the others said is history likewise, but one might take a look round at the people who said it. • • ♦ There is General "Babs" on the flank— an excellent place for a man who is a disciple of mobility— engaged in assuring the less-distinguished-lookmg Minister of Mines that "Makaroff was a fine fellow." Not a born orator, "Babs, but soldierly short, concise grammatical. Excellent bearing of soldiers in Wellington; a tribute to New Zealand cadets and to New Zealand soldiers raised a oheer , a graceful modesty in expressing pride in the first lone ot defence—these were the points in tne General's speech. • • • Mr Justice Edwards was the least robust looking man at the "swell table. Once or twice he brightened at a sentence that may have been not wholly padding, and clapped his hands twice. His depressing smileless seriousness when the eminent Mel. B. Spun- convulsed the gathering, led one to conclude that the phrase "as solemn as a judge" has its uses. • • • ./Be-spectaoled Sn James Prendergast, ex-Chief Justice, in speaking weighs every word he says before he lets it go. When it is gone, it is worth intercepting Sometimes he traverses a sentence, in order to re-try it. If it is guilty of a wrong interpretation, he gently corrects it. Sir James's head is remarkably shiny, but it® chief attraction is that it is visibly divided, not fore and aft, but abeam. The intellectual faculties are penned' off, while the social faculties are likewise in a separate compartment. That is why no smile got to Sir James' face during the Spurr "turn. The intervening wall intercepted the telegraph. • • • ••"Another impression. Mr. Seddon is f^til] most capable in the handling of dramatic effect. "I have got more than mv deserts," he said, sadly looking at the table-cloth He didn't go ahead. He waited for the terrific "No!" he ..new was under every waistcoat. He eschewed politics, but touched the childcrop failure. Such a well-known sentiment as "New Zealand is the brightest gem in the Imperial diadem" was never disputed. Not a man but would say the same thing of every other bit of the Empire were he a resident. It is a harmless sentiment. • * * v' Mr. Hogg, Minister for L that 's to say, member for Mastertoni, said the population of New Zealand was well diffused over its area, Mr. Seddon having previously remarked that parts of Wellington were more congested than either

Biiminghani, Manchester, Glasgow , or Sheffield. We had made a note to lemark inter alia that Colonel Pitt seemed to be at gieat pains to defend the Legislative Council, when Sir Joseph Ward took the wind out of the Lance sails by asking why, at all public functions Legislative Councillors always tried to justify the Upper Chambei s existence. As a mattei of fact, it 1 enquires a good deal of advocacy to emphasise its sunerb beauty and utility. yXam Duncan on the tu&sook was immense. He drew a moving picture of a juvenile Tarn, with a grubbing hoe, conquering the piuneval wilderness, and making a smiling homestead. We don't remember having seen Tarn smile himself, but we are sure that if the Minister of Lands were given one of two things to do — reply to a toast, or plough a tussocky bit of ground— he'd get on swimmingly — with the tussocks. • * * /And Kennedy Mac! The round-waist-ooated, warm-hearted, sweet-voiced Kennedy Mao! The George Robins of New Zealand, and chief postprandial orator of a city somewhat lacking in such gifts. How he took the audience by the hand, and introduced young Diok, a boy of many virtues and immense possibilities. How he showed them the miners' advocate, the loyal champion of the rights of the West Coast worker. How he luxuriated in adulation when he saw King Dick enter the portals of Parliament. How he, in perfect good taste, and with intense conviction, saw that such success as the Premier had achieved had been made possible by a loyal and loving helpmeet. Fact is, Kennedy Mac stirred the blood, and was very much in earnest. Nothing in the way of land-advertisement Kennedy Mac has ever written approached in ornateness, volume, or intensity the tribute to our greatest citizen. It was the speech we could have least done without. • • • We still, however, question the entire kindness of those well-disposed peasons who banquetted Mr. Seddon publicly. He said it did him good. He wanted more of it — more social harmony, more hand-to-hand unity — but Dr. Valmtme looked solemn. Perhaps, he doesn't agree that what may be good for him and others is not good for King Diok at present. ♦ • * -Wairarapa's M.H.R., Buchanan, Heems to have an idea that the mere backblocks should have roads and bridges, and all that kind of thing, while the cities should go without ornamental structures necessary for the comfort and convenience of civil servants. Of course, the fallacy is evident. What could have possessed him, for instance, in referring to the new railway offices m Wellington in such a manner as to throw doubt on its claim to be built before Wairarapa roads. Pie-sessionally he read from a published repoit a glowing de&cription of this building, which cost £27,000, with its handsome pressed 1 brick and carved stone extei lor, its "Wunderlicht" ceilings inside (ramparted from Germany), its beautiful tiles (imported from France), its gorgeous lifts and railings (unpoited from America). v/fts paintings of rich warm colours, graceful lange and small towers, its in^ terior blue andi gold ornamentation, and altogether fairy-like and wonderfully beautiful and 1 elegant figures, embossments, and electrical fittings — in short, a perfect palace — built out of borrowed money, white not a pound could be grot for the backblocks settlers "No doubt." said Mr Buchanan, "it will be very comforting to those same backblocks settlers, when worrying about schools, and] wading throueh mud. to think of the beautiful 'Wundlerliclit' palace." Some of the settlers' facial expressions of delight would have made lovely ait photographs.

v/Father W. J. Lewis, S.M., Administi ator of the Archdiocese of Wellington, is lather much m the public eye just now, in that his position connects him most closely with the "Rejoinder to the Bibleum-Schools Conference." The tall, grey-haired priest, with the kindly, tolerant smile and a disposition to love the virtue and 1 pity the failings of his fellow men, is Irish. "Perhaps you might have gathered it from me tongue?" he asked. We aidmit it. Father Lewis is a Kildaare boy, so small wonder is it at all that he has the appreciation of his fellow countrymen for something with a smile 1111 it. * * * he had finished giving vent to his youthful exuberance, he completed a sound education at Lyons and Bordeaux, France. "Bordeaux is the most beautiful place m the world." Sune, its wines aie mellowed by its sunny disposition, and Father Lewis has brought a bit of the disposition to New Zealand. Later, the student became a professor in St. Mary's College, Dundalk, 'holding the position until he came to Wellington, twenty-one years ago. The good padre has ministered at Hastings- — with the well-remembered Father Remer — was parish priest at Blenheim for five years, and gravitated to Timaru, where he was also parish priest for two years. • • • ,XHe has been an institution at Wellington "St. Pat's" for three years. Anything else P "Well, yes ; I was administrator of the Parish Cathedral, in Hill-street, and it's little enough respect the church had for me when it burnt itself down." Father Lewis used! to play football. He is very keen on watching the game now. He has 1 not played for many years. "Thanks be to God," he says, "I have all me legs and arms left." When Providence served the genial priest with limbs, it didn't forget to add a heart and a head. • ♦ • Messrs. Lewis and Witty, Ms.H.R. are brilliant wits. The former, in referring to the Upper House, called it a collection of "curiosities," while the latter suggested "monstrosities." Charles further said that no words he could employ would adequately convey the contempt he felt for the collection, and if it were the only House possible he would gladly burn it. We are wondering if the Upper House has been dealing with any of these gentlemen s little Bills. • • * yK surprise packet was opened to the Ktston'shed gaze of Major Dunk at the Palmerston Show last Friday. In quite ai casual way merry-faced Manson called the burly ex-mayor to one side. He was wanted by some friends. "Oh, I'm too busy to drink !" replied the energetic chairman of the executive of the show. "It isn't a drink," retorted Mr. Manson, pulling the big fellow along. And then the surprise, in the shape of a handsome silver coffee set and fruit stand, was sprung. It was an acknowledgment from exhibitors of the energy and courtesy last year's president had sihown to this year's exhibitors Certainly, the solid token of esteem was well bestowed., for Major Dunk had, for a period of five weeks, devoted himself daily to supervising and helping out the work of preparing the machinery hall for last week's show. The exhibitors were delighted with the success of the surprise they had sprung upon the big fellow. • • • M.H.R. Fraser, as an instance of the remarkable quality of the native memory, avers that a blind Gisborne Maori can retail the tribal genealogical tree and all its branches for twenty generations back without a mistake. Of course this is absolutely correct, because Mr Fraser says so, but, seeing there is no written record of these genealogies, who is to check the accuracy of the recitation — except Mr. Fraser P

f The topic of the closing hours of last week was the lively reception given by critics to Mr. James Izett's book, "Maori Lore," written to order and published by Government authority. Some of our expert Maorilogists and literary men have condemned the book so heartily that it has proved a most unusual success from the selling point of view. At the end of thie week "Maori Lore" was selling like the proveibial hot cakes, and threatened, like "Polynesian Mythology," to run out of date. "It's a marvellous work!" was the criticism of one collector of books to another in the city ; "but you should 1 get a copy before it's out of print !" Mr. Izett, who was engaged in journalism in Ohristohuroh before he came to Wellington a few years ago, has thus won fame. King Dick got well, and to Wellington, just in time to absolve the city from the blame of being unable to grip the idea of making Governor-changing a success. As a matter of fact, some people in charge of affairs didn't quite know who was who or _ what's what. King; Dick found, for instance, tiEat H.M.S. Psyche was bound for Auckland on the night preceding the ceremonies. He at once communicated with Government House, and got the ordeirs for her departure countermanded, thus preventing what would have appeared a grave blunder of official etiquette. The Premier's quick girasp of details, and his large knowledge of ceremonial observances prevented more than one disaster Find heart-burning. * * * Not generally known that tihe foreign Consuls of Wellington only received am invitation to be present at the ceremony at midnight preceding the departure of Lord Ranfurly and the arrival of his successor, Lord Plunket. But for King Dick they would have been overlooked altogether. The Mayor was not the first person to greet the new Governor. The Reception Committee observed' him plant his foot for the first time in New Zealand, while the Mayor luxuriated in the shelter of the dads in Post-office Square. • • • Izard on the convictions of editors who mould public opinion: — "The editor drives down to his marble hall in his brougham. He has breakfasted well. He takes has place in his sanctum with an indulgent smile. /Ah! Dry Monopole !' he exclaims, as a minion with the hvery of the great main, opens a bottle. He sips some globules, anld his soul mellows. 'Bring me a pen!' It is brought. From his completed writing we learn, 'That the 1 City CottHeil composed of men whose far-seeing genius, remarkable capability, , eminent capacity,' etc., 'that the Benevolent Trustees are oozing charitableness, most of which comes out of their own pockets,' 'that lawyers are the most selfsacrificing members of the community, ready and willing, at any time, to lay down their lives, or even tihe six-and-eriigbtpesnces, in the cause of humanity.' » • • i/"The editor feels just as good as that until a certain muggy day, when, -on arriving in the breakfast-room, the butler informs him that his tJiousaind'ffuinea carriage-horse has brokem a leg. The editor has a touch of the lumbago, too. Tea? 'Great Scott, dk> you want to ruin my digestion?' A little sodiawater and dry toast then? Walks to tihe marble hall. The last bottle ofMonopole has been prigged by the 'devil.' 'The City Council, with its culpable disregard for the' public convenience, and its criminal neglect of the long-suffering people, have," etc. Terhaps no body of men a,re > less capable of administerinc; a public institution than the Benevolent Trustees,' 'and the lawyers, in that grasT>insQj spirit which is so characteristic of the avaricious species,' etc." Charlie mops his brow. We believe him.

v£ady Fiances Balfour piobably doesn't know the Rev. Mr. Isitt, and she certainly doesn't want barmaids burnt to death. She said she considered that a, great injustice would be done to a very large and respectable class of young women if the threat to abolish baimaads were put into execution. "A SicS iea * deal of nonsense," she said, "i& talked about barmaids. Perhaps it is because one of the qualifications of the business is that the girl must be good-look-ing. Is that in itself a crime? It is most cruel and untrue to say that barmaids as a class take to dunk. As a matter of fact, I believe that a higher per centage of barmaids get mainecl than a,ny other class of young women. They make most satisfactory wives. And they ought to, for, though the work of "looking after a bai k practically unskilled labour, a youne woman must have a good temper and a considerable amount of tact to be successful." . \/Lady Frances heard of a sriil who was always called in to use her persuasive powers with troublesome customers when the efforts of her father and brother had failed. "What too." she asks "can be the harm of a young man talking to a girl over a bar? It is in that way that acquaintances that may lead to marriage are made. Certainly it is no worse than other girls indulging in 'walking out.' Besides., what would you do with, all the girls you robbed of work? Would you turn them out of the bars into the streets? • • • v "I maintain that every woman has the right to make an honest living in any way she can, and that she should be protected in her occupation. It is upon that broad principle that I am fighting the barmaid's battle. for it is an honest calling , so are the occupations of the artist's model and the bal-let-girl, though I suppose some women wouldi like to rob other women of work by abolishing those businesses too Wonder if the Rev. Prohibitionist would give Lady Frances a place on the pyre. • • • "Bobs" is coming to New Zealand — perhaps. He has, apparently, many relatives in the country. The genume one appears to be the wife of the Hon. Col. Baillie, who is a cousin. Mrs. Balcombe Brown, of this city, a daughter of Mrs. Baillie, was a guest of Lord Roberts while in England last year. The late Hon. Mr. Bonar was also a relative of the great soldier. Revives the little yarnlet told a year or so since about a New Zealand grocer, who is a maior or something m the colonial army He was measuring kerosene into a bottle in the back premises of his shop during the Boer war. A man called in to see him. The shop-assistant ran to him. "You're wanted at the front, sir'" he sadd. "Great Soot' You don't mean to tell me Lord Roberts is dead'" • • * Talking about the great little soldier, who always rides a big horse, and uses a biscuit-box to climb aboard, he was a small, pale youth when he fiist joined the artillery in India His fate was to command a garrison gun that fired ceremonial salutes for Governors and those kind of people. It was only after lepeated supplications that the small Lieutenant was allowed to endanger his fragile life by haying a fight on the frontiers. His life from that first fight is a record of heroism and devotion to Sovereign and 1 Empire that has few equals in British history. Throughout his long career, the great soldier has not only "honoured the King." but has "feared God." At no time during his military life has he missed church parade — or civil worship — on Sundiays. Commonwealth Premier Watson is like Richelieu, Gambetta, Palmerston, Garibaldi, Disraeli, Buonaparte, Gladstone, Abraham Lincoln, Nero, Caesar, and Christopher Columbus. Sydney "Bulletin" says so in the course of one short article. Maybe. • » • •/ Wherever one looks in the papers one sees that the production of "Tapu" (by Mr. Alfred Hill) has been successful in Auckland. There was once a very clever young man named Arthur Adams who, among many other things, wrote "Tapu " Nobody seems to know this. One might as well describe Gilbert's numerous operas as being by Sullivan. If there is any honour to be served, out, Arthur Adams ought to have just a small share of it. • • * ■s/ Captain-adjutant Henderson, who was a prominent brigadier of cadets on Govern or-ohanging day, tells a little story. The gallant young defenders, with their little chests' swelled with pride, were guarding things, and the captain was standing close to a little boy whose restless eye roved over the surrounding scheme of decorations. He fixed his optic on a gorgeous crown flanked by the mystic letters "E.R "Please, sir'" "Yes, my boy? "What does E.R. mean?" "Why don't you know? Edward Rex, of course. Edward the King." "Oh (disappointedly) I thought it stood for Edwin R-nold, the Chief Justice." Lord has a scheme for teaching ■Jhtt£M*^lism.

\/ The genial Knight of the Waimate, Sri William Jukes Steward, is at it again. He passes his tame alternately in writing poems and battling for the rights of the down-trodden softer sex. He spent years, that might have won him a dukedom in wider fields of poilitios, in worrying for the right of the deceased wife's sister to marry her brothei -in-law, and now he is sacnficrag the precious hours that might be devoted to the composition of a modern Odyssey or Paradise Lost, to the advocacy of the deceased wife's niece's desire to marry her uncle-in4aw. William Jukes is like the inventor who exhausts his energy in working out some discovery that is wanted by about onehundredth per cent, of the population and brings in no royalties. v Bacteriologist Gilruth makes his annual visit to the Winter Show at the hub of the Manawatu memorable. Last week's visitation was no exception to the rule. The lengthy Scot lead a paper at the Dairy Conference on "Mammitis," heading his learned discourse with the sensational title, "A Menace to the Dairy Industry." He overawed Messrs. Hayseed, Bucoliok, Wayback, and Co with bacteriological terms, and put every layman present off the drinking of milk for at least a week "with his scare article. 'Tass the mammitis" became part of the hotel vernacular in

Palmerston, but the lacteal fluid was thencef 01 ward an unpopular beverage. "He upset my understanding with his enthusiasm and big words," said a leading dairyman, the day after tthe reading of the paper, "or I should have told Gil1 uth that Ills, mammitis was all tommyrot 1 " The prevailing invitation now is "Will you comeandave a mammitis-and-w hisky ' ♦ • • /Mr. G. H. Owen, New Zealand managei for Messrs. Sharland amd Co., is doing America. He was president of the Boxing Association in New Zealand, and is still vice-president. In writing to the secretary here, he indicates the sort of hold the sport has in Chicago, and the manner of its management, which seems to be as orderly as in New Zealand. There are no "knock outs," and spectators a>re very liberal with the dollars when a boxer does good work. All the contestants are well paid for their services Referees at these meetings get £6 a night. The Chicago Athltic Club is bigger than the Wairarapa Farmers' building, has a membership of 2000, is fitted with a gymnasium, baths, fiies, courts, and lounges. Every Saturday a vaudeville entertainment is held, and a paper is published by the club. In short, he indicates that Wellington might hustle, and go m for something of the kind, except, of course, that it would have to be less elaborate than the Chicago affair.,