It is Town Talk

Free Lance, Volume IV, Issue 190, 20 February 1904, Page 22

It is Town Talk

—That the bashful Mayor is said to be not unwilling for a fifth term. —That "no heel-taps" is the watchword of Wellington men. That » why so many of them w ear rubber heels. —That a Wellington" draper has applied for the Royal Humane Society s .KCdal for selling trousers under cost price. —That up in Auckland, people are saying the big-wigs of the General Anglican Synod are stronger at bowls than at argument. —That Felix Tanner, the fasting man, should join the Saltation Army. He would make a model self-denying officer. That America has now schools at which millionaires' daughters are taught the art of subjugating the Bntish earls they intend to buy. —That seveial old maids in Wellington have become engaged since they found out this is leap year. A great many more have expectations. —That Mr. D. Nathan has been "approached" to allow himself to be nominated for a place in the Mayoral Steeplechase. What price about him.'' —That Wellington has now become the "big smoke" of the colony. That is why the headquarters of the American Tobacco Company have been shitted here. „ —That at a recent Wellington wedding, a young lady spectator was observed to be crying bitterly. Enquiry elicited the fact that she was married herself. —That 149 people were drowned in New Zealand waters last year. Therefore Tom Shields, who has been teaching the Wellington young idea how to paddle, deserves a medal. That only recently has a Governor's wife been spoken of as "Her Excellency." Australian papers suggest that "Her new Excellency" is more excellent than "His new Excellency." —That, in the New Zealand population statistics the figures are given 'exclusive of Maoris." Chinese are included in thejgures. In the words ot the diplomatists, "It is significant. —That, since Whitaker Wrights sensational suicide by cyanide of potassium the cranks of the colonies have been making a run on that form ot death. .Strong is the power of suggestion. —That Mr Barber is being pressed to stand for the Mayoralty at the coming election. Popular sentiment would suppoit',any man who would give the people less of the municipal chaos that now exists. —That a try-on at levying blackmail is beino- made at the expense of an eminent citizen. The operator works the game through the post, and threatens to tell naughty stories unless she is si ] enced with £100. —That Great Britain is arranging w ith the whole of the provision-canning factories of Australia, so that, in the event-, of her engagement in Eastern hostilities, the other fellow is cut off from the Federal food supply. —That the latest tall yarn comes from Kelburne, and tells of a hen's nest with a dozen eggs that was found in the grate of - parlour. Chookey had gone in daily through the door, left open on account of the hot weather. That, before commencing his sermon the other Sunday in an up-country church, the parson announced that "Mr. So and So had lost a ring, and the finder would be rewarded." A new menace to the advertising department of country papers. —That all the beasts that are killed by lightning, anthrax, noxious weeds, ironmonger- or any other cause, are always "valuable." We would like to see a news paragraph about an attenuated "weed" having died a violent death. Even weeds are orchids when compensation is claimed. That some of the Auckland merchants know the value of picturesque advertising. One firm declares that Felix Tanner could never have brought himself to live on water if he had once tasted their tea. Here is a cheap hint for Nelson Moate, Walter Nathan, and Turnbull and Co. That Mr. Thomas Mandeno Jackson, the Auckland tenor, who went Home to have lus voice cultivated, has just started into business up North as an auctioneer and real estate agent. There are some auctioneers that we know who might spend a little money to advantage on voice cultivation.

That the Far East tiouble is a Godsend to the country papers and some parsons. —That Bert Royle has chosen foi the title of his next Chnstmas pantomime, "The House That Peicy Filled. ' .That Sydney Chinese have contnbuted £25,000 to the Japanese patriotic war fund. The silver thread of kinship ! . That a pandemonium is played every day in all parts of the city by the 3anghng'of iron rails Anyone with nerves should go av\ a> , and live on the top of Egmont That a little mid-island tow n start-. Ed a school of arts six months ago They call it the "school of hearts" now . Most of the pupils have inclined to one another matrimonially. That people quarantined at Sydney as a result of the smallpox boom in New Zealand, had to pay their own expenses—7s a day. Several are going ta test the legality of the action. —That the Hon Tom Hislop is said to be nibbling at the mayoral bait. He has lately been getting himself very nt for any civic duties that may devolve on him by a course of Rotorua. —That the sight of a laige citizenstanding UP to his waist in water in Constable-street, on Saturday guiding his parcels across the flood with a walk-ing-stick, is evidence that Wellingtons drain capacity is not large — That-His Excellency the Governor will not go to the Chathams as he had intended. It is believed he remains in New Zealand in order to declare war should the Russians come along demanding Westport coal. —That a lady, who desired to croso Adelaide-road during last Friday s thunderstorm, narrowly escaped drowning m the middle of the road. She was a "moist unpleasant body" when nshed out. Country visitors beware' That a great many ladies confess to having had "a lovely cry" over that dear Cuyler Hastings in The Light That Failed." One of them, whose sobbing was quite audible in the dress circle of the Opera House, went home and "sacked" Bridget on the spot for not having supper ready. —That the Rev. F Nicholl, of Ravensbourne is the "orator" of the Congregational Union now sitting in Wellington. His address at the public meeting on Friday night on "The Visions of Youth," is said to have been quite a brilliant effort. He believes in cultivating the imagination. That the vaccination harvest at Christchurch has been almost as bountiful as at Wellington. One medico there admits having cleared £90 by a day's work, mostly among the uppei circles of Society. Some of the ouWje vaccinators found it easy to rake in £oU and' £60 for a day's work at the State fee of half-a-crown a head.

PEEOT