It is Town Talk

Free Lance, Volume I, Issue 41, 13 April 1901, Page 22

It is Town Talk

That WangriiiUL will likely eiect a. municipal gymnasium shortly. - -That testimonials to departing officials are all that fancy paints them. — That an engagement will shortly be announced which will surprise a great many people. — That a Masterton man, who has been dead for years, appears in the revised list of J.sP. — That the new Divorce Act has brought to light a large number of worthless benedicts. — That the Manakau paper facetiously heads its S.M Court column, "Where Trangressors Meet " — That little Mangakau is the latest place to furnish a theme for scandal. It is the same old, old story. — That quite a number of New Zealand journalists have applied for positions on the Federal Hansard reporting staff. — That a lady, who turned up at a little function minus her "dress" teeth one night recently, hurried home, and forgot to return. — That the Picton girls are complaining that there are no young men left since these Contingents were raised and sent away. — That Petone people are wondering wiry their member does not have a cut at their mayoralty, instead of flying for metropolitan honours. — -That an examination paper at a well-known Collegiate School in New Zealand asked scholars to state what they knew about the weather "Who and wheie is De Wet?", "What is a throw ?" , and "State some swimming records."

— That a one-time burning advocate of temperance is now sleeping partner in a fair-paying northern brewery. — That some high tales are being told anont <x "select" social gathering, which \\ as held in the city the 'other day. -That a damsel, tv ell known in the shall we call" society, over Blenheim wav, is talking of going on the stage. — That the Cantei bury Rugby Union's football insurance scheme should be adopted by every' union in the colony. — That a well-gilt, tony individual met ln& fate during polo week, in the shape of a hazel-eyed, dressy governess. — That the only person of any importance at Westport who is not a J.P. is the schoolmaster, and he is regarded as an object of curiosity. — That his engagement to a heiress is the only thing that keeps sweet the credit of one high-toned city Johnny, and well he knows it. — That three city eychstes doffed their skirts on arrival at a country hotel, on a recent Sunday, and sat down to dinner in the costume originated by Mrs. Bloomer. — That inquiry is being made for the eccentric lady who took away a milk can on Saturday night last from a house in Ghuznee-street, and left her purse with money in it in its place. — That the individual who was stuck up by three creditors prior to departuie for the Wairarapa races did not at all like it. He took great pains to explain that he was not going to the races. — That a wild, mysterious yarn, concerning the elopement of two Welhngtonians, turns out to be all fiction. A lady and an admirer chanced to cross Sydney wards by same boat, but the man is back — that's all. — That Royal recognition of some representative of the native race is exEected when the Duke visits wonderful l^otorua, and Native Minister "Jimmy" Carroll is expected to blossom out as Sir James, at least. — That a goodly number of Blenheim people attended the "send-off" of the Seventh Contingent, in order to say farewell to Trooper R. Ireland, of that town. Dick Ireland is well known as one of the best men in the saddle just across the Straits, and Marlborough wishes him a safe return.

— That a certain canvasser got a great wigging from a lady near Te Aro railway stattion on Sunday night. What was it all about? — That one old lady gave most ample particulars of her household in her census paper, including the number of her fowls, ducks, cats, and dogs. — That the ex-fiancee of a civil servant had perforce to travel recently with him and his bride per coach on part of their honeymoon trip. — That Te Whiti and Co. gave Governor Ranfurly a tip-top dinner at Parihaka. Dried shark and other native luxuries did not figure on the menu. — That Taranaki County Councillors courageously resigned in a body to permit ratepayers deciding on the vexed toll-gate question. Toll for the brave ' — That one country school in the Manawatu district takes the starch out of some of the volunteer companies with its up-to-date mounted rifle cadet corps. — That a critical visitor to Southbridge (South Island) says its a wonderful place. It has a bath that's dry, water-races that are blocked, and lamps that are not lit. • — That a local accountant, suffenng from brain-fag, was surprised the other day when his Lambton-quay barber said he reckoned he did as much "head work" as his customer. — That an Aucklander, who made a little fortune at the Cat>e in the lodg-ing-house business during the earlier stages of the war, is now travelling through New Zealand in princely style. — That a Wellington father has decided to retire from the business of helping his college son with his homework. Reason is that when he asked what his teacher thought of the cooperative work, young hopeful replied "He says I'm getting more stupid every day." — That one of the motions proposed at the annual meeting of the "New Zealand Times," and not chronicled in its report, was that portraits be obtained of the eight managers the paper has had since it has been in company hands, and that they be hung up in a room to be called "The New Zealand Times Portrait Gallery." They probably thought Wright was working off a bit of sarcasm.

— That, while boys raise their kites by wind, men raise the wind by kites. — That a religious crank in Wellington described himself as "agent for Heaven," when filling in his census paper on Sunday week. — That the latest bit of gossip concerns a chagrined youth, who has threatened to sue a wealthy country widow for breach of promise. He had apparently built his hopes on her, and got into serious debt. — That a well-dressed person, who gazes upon the beer when it is sixpence, caused some picturesque language on Lambton Ouay the other day by stopping a hurrying 'busman to ask the time. — That a female divorce petitioner, down South, lately appeared in Court with a hatband bearing, in large gold letters, the one word: "Liberty." She won her suit, and it is said that she will soon be doing another period of slavery." —That M.H.R. Jackson Palmer has been assured by Public Works Minister Hall-Jones that by Boxing Day next he will have trains running on the first section of the Stratford light line railway. — That a Southern paper is busy explaining that the intelligent com'p. is responsible for its statement that tha "Corruption" of King Edward VII. will not take place till the middle of next year. —That, when on the s.s. Rotorua, the Honourable Richard Harman Jeffares Reeves said to the inquiring purser. "I'm Reeves," the purser replied, Well, I'm Chamberlain." Which was a fact. a ~ T^ at m Tro °P er L en Home, of the Second Contingent, has returned to Blenheim from the front. "The-Thin-Ked-Lme of Blenheim was very popular in South Africa, as was also his bosom pal, Alf. Congdon. —That the play of "What happened to Jones might have been enacted with some fresh business in it if the facetious skinner of the "Duchess" had carried out his holiday threat to throw overboard the first person who boarded the steamer except by the gangway. However, there was more in his bark than his bight, as he also added he would throw his dog over into the bargain.