ENTRE NOUS

Free Lance, Volume I, Issue 22, 1 December 1900, Page 10

ENTRE NOUS

THEY are telling a good story just now about the Hon. Hill-Trevor, Aide-de-Camp to the Governor, which shows pretty clearly that he is a man of resource, and able to cope with sudden emergencies quite foreign to his regular duties. On Sunday last he as taking a walk from Petone into town just by way of pleasant afternoon exercise. While he was passing through Kaiwarra a woman tore out of a house hard by the roadside, and, seizing the astonished aide-de-camp by the coat sleeve, cried out in the greatest distress, "Oh, sir, my baby's dying, what shall I do? For pity's sake come and save it." * * * Mr. Hill-Trevor did not stop to question her. He saw at a glance that the woman was labouring under the excitement of strong natural emotion. Nor did he inform her that he was a rathei exalted personage, and advise her to send for a doctor. On the contrary, he promptly obeyed his humane instincts, and played the. part of the good Samaritan. Following the distracted mother into her cottage his eye rested upon an infant struggling in convulsions. He asked the woman if she had any hot water in the house. Alas, no, she had not. Would she prepare some? The Hon. Chas. Hill-Trevor hadn't time to answer. He cashed out of that; cottage into the next in double-quick time. In that next cottage he saw a kettle standing on the hob, ready for the evening meal. Postponing explanations for a more convenient season he whipped that steaming kettle off the hob and with the speed of a sprinter engaged in an obstacle race had disappeared with it before the alarmed inmates could find their tongues. To make a long story short, he gave the convulsed infant a hot bath, rubbed mustard on its little chest, and only left when its fit was over, and the danger was passed. The grateful mother was effusive with her thanks, and protably is still" in ignorance that the help she procured so dramatically was rendered not by a medico but by no less a pessonage than the Governor's aide-de-camp. The Otago trooper who proudly displays the birthday book stolen from Louis Botha's daughter takes rank with a Victorian who is the proud possessor of the whiskers clipped off the face of a dead Boer! An Opotiki member of one of our contingents recently sent some trophies to his friends with this covering note — "I am sending you a few 'Boer photos, which I got off a fellow I shot. Also a watch and gold pin!" * * * Sec what comes of the example set by shaking - the - Princes-hand Haybittle. An Irishman"- bet another Italian down in Orepuki (where the shale grows) the other day £ for £ that he would have the honour of "shaking fists wid Lord Hanfurly when he came down south." The other fellow took up the bet with a warning that such conduct as forcing the hand of a real Governor would be an unpardonable sin. Lord Ranfurly visited Orepuki, and one of the front Tankers who cried "God bless your Excellency!" was the man who "had a pound on it," and he got in his grip whilst the loser stood and wondered why some sort of folks should rush in where others feared to tread! • • ♦ It has long been the dream of the New Zealand Labour Party to run a newspaper of its own. Various leaders with journalistic longings have had committees set up to consider the matter, and every detail of printing and policy has been written up and laid before Trades Councils and Unions. The "Lance" recalls history through reading in the daily press that the Wellington Trades Council is once more considering the subject. No less than three schemes hve been considered by the Council during the past ten years, but each one has failed because of jealousy. Some union thinks an individual is trying bo "work two points for himself and one for unionism." During 1890-91 the Dunedin Trades Council had before it a sch^Tne prepared by Mr. J. A. Millar (then the leader of the Seamen's Union and now M.H.8.). who was to have edited the organ. The scheme got no further than a specimen first page. Then the Canterbury Council had a suggestion, followed by Wellington and Auckland — and now another effort is beine; made to establish a labour journal, which is to be non-partisan in politics.

A good tiling was got off by a legal luminary in the Supreme Court not so very long ago in a city located — well, certainly more than 100 miles from Wellington. The lawyer was arguing a case of some importance, and was dwelling upon propositions that were known to and accepted by even the clerks who stand against the pi ess -table in the S.M. Court. His Honour stood it for a little while with manifest impatience, but at last exclaimed — "Cannot counsel safely assume that ims Court understeinds the rudiments of law?" Quiclcame the rotort — "I made that mißtak your Honour, in the iower Court, otnerwise this case would not have been here on appeal!" And the S.M. whose decision was in que&tion was present "gaining knowledge.'" * * * The Catholic community of Masterton will sadly miss the Rev. Father Isborne, who shortly takes his departure for the Old Country. The reverend Father's sojourn in the parish hi« been a most pleasant one for the parishioners, and for him. The latter was emphasised in a practical form at the Presbytery last week, when a number jf friends met, under the presidency of the Dean, and presented the departing cleric with a valedictory address, xn<l an unimportant appendage— a purse of sovereigns. There is a certain individual travelling about Wellington just now with an up-to-date version of the "confidence' trick. His only stock-in-trade are a Brammagen finger-ring and a plausible story that he was one of Mr. Ranstead's special settlers, and that he fell into trouble. He Vrishes a small loan, of course, and offers as security his gold ring, which he says he bought for £2 17s at Home. It looks the genuine article, for it bears a stamp-mark inside. Several well-intending people are mentioned as having already been taken in. Somebody in the Wairarapa Farmers' Association is said to have advanced ss, and declined to deprive the poor fellow of his ring. In Kirkcaldie and Stains's establishment one of the staff lent the confidence man 3s and consented to hold the ring until the borrower returned next day. But he didn't return, and on the ring being shown to a jeweller he said it was about the cleverest imitation he had seen, and that it was worth just about threepence. Quite a number of confiding people are understood to be waiting for that special settler to call again.

Here is a lovely thing from Monday s "Times" : — "On the 9th instant a ship was sighted by the officers of the Rotomahana off 'Cape Campbell,' and up to date her identity has not been estahlished. It was suggested that she may have been the Corollo, bound from 'Port Chalmers to 'Dunedin,' but it has been ascertained that this vessel came 'south about.'" MarveHous! Bound from Port Chalmers to Dunedin, eh? Then why on earth was she at sea. Or, stay! — is it the "Times" that is at sea.

' The Wellington Shipwrights' Society, which celebrated its 27th anniversary in the Trocadero last week has substantial claims to honourable distinction. It has a longer continuous'existence than any other trade organisation in this part of the colony. It has never had any trade disputes, and has never thought of working the machinery of the Industrial Conciliation and Arbitration Act. It has pursued the oven tenor of its way calmly, sensibly, and without fuss or flummery, and any little differences that may have arisen between master and men have always hoeu amicably adjusted. Messrs. Paul Coffey, Sam. Woods, and T. J. Dixon are the three survivors of the band of pioneers who formed this very excellent trade society, and it speaks volumes for the care with which the foundations were laid that there never baa been occasion to alter the rules. * * • It has surprised many people that no motive for the crime was alleged or suggested by the Crown in the case of the man Styche, sentenced to seven gears' imprisonment for endeavouring to rid himself of his wife. For some years before his arrest, it was common talk in Christchurch that he was "carrying on" with a young and well-to-do woman living in his own neighbourhood, and, by a significant coincidence, this girl and her mother left Christchurch immediately after his arrest. The fact is being strongly commented upon in Christchurch that no reference to thife "friendship" was made during the progress of the case, and that it was not put forward as a sufficient motive for his scheme. Was there any reason for this silence P And, if so, what was that reason ? * * • The owner of the hurdler Waiwera, which was engaged at the recent Wellington race meeting, has been learning what a mysterious thing official redtape is, and, of course* he is profoundly impressed. Wh"en he "brought his nag down by rail from Wanganui to Wellington like a prudent man he took out a return ticket. It never occurred to him that it would make any difference to the railway people if he didn't complete his return journey. That is just where the aforesaid Ted-tape tripped him up on Monday last. It seems that ho had a racing engagement with his horse at Feilding, and on his way back from Wellington he informed the train officials that he wished to disembark Waiwera "at Feilding. 'He nearly fainted when they told him it could not be done. "Why not?" he tasked. "Because the ticket says Wanganui," they replied. "Yes, but I don't want you to carry him as far as Wanganui. I want him put out of the train at FeildiiUg. He has got to race there day after to-morrow, and he won't be fit if I take him further, and bring him back. Besides if you are afraid you'll lose another fare from Wanganui to Feilding I'll pay for that amount just to save the horse so much unnecessary train travelling." But they wouldn't budge from , their position. The ticket said Wanganui was the horse's destination, and willy-nilly to Wanganui he must go.

"South Africa is a land of rivers without water, flowers without scent, and birds without song. There is no sign of a spot that says 'Come heie and make thy home.' The average house is a creation of unwashed ugliness. Every railway station is an eyesore. One of my travelling companions — an officer on his way to the front — exclaimed 'My God, what a country to be fighting for!' " — So writes an English officer. # * tAlleged in social^ circles with painful circumstantiality that a certain rather snappish Wellington old maid, who lias hitherto held pessimistic views on matrimony, is ahoul to ued a well-connected Hawke's Baj' "cockatoo." who is living in daily fear of getting a letter announcing that lie has inherited the family estates at Home. 'Twasn't the lady's face, 'tis said, but hoi fortune that attracted the man-that -is-to-be. Well, he has now got both. ,

A squad of the "Devil's Own" was awaiting the sitting of the Supreme Court the other morning, and filling m time with experiences. One of the group, who had mixed in his time with members of the American Bar, raised a laugh with this reminiscence related bv a friend. Justice Shiras was hearing a case in which one of the most eminent of U.S. lawyers was defending the rights of his client to a patent cot lar button, which he claimed was Koing illegally manufactured by the other side. During his argument the most emiuent counsel was describing th<* patent, and praising its virtues, wheri suddenly his Honour observed — "I should like to ask the learned counsel if his client manufactures a collar button that won't roll under the bed." The human interest pf the query raised a shout of laughter, which the "Silence-in-this-honourable-Courfc!" of the local Basun failed at once to suppress.

A susceptible individual of amorous proclivities, apparelled according to the latest (English fashion, and^oasting a magnificent moustache, which was waxed to the proper caper, picked up a small parcel and a dainty pair of lady's kid gloves on alighting from the tram at Newtown the other day. Here was a nice little romance, he thought, and he perused the papers to ascertain if they were advertised for. They were, and togging himself out in the "expectation of meeting a charming young lady, he repaired to the address given. But there was no i-omance about the matter. Theloser of the parcel was a 16-stone womaji with 'big feet, and was aged fifty-six or thereabouts, and the dandy, delivering his parcel like a shop boy, walked disappointedly away. • • * Most people are careless in some form or other, but cyclists take the palm. The sublimely indifferent manner in which they leave their costly wheels standing in gutters or outside buildings is a fruitful cause of the bicycle thieving industry so prevalent in the colony just now. At Christchurch last week Mr Justice Martin refused to grant probation to a man convicted of a little freak of this kind, alleging that the Act wasn't made to be abused. • • • The tale of a hat. A Wellingtonian 'who was ' one of the last to turn up for dinner at his hotel during the Christchur<sh festivities, perched his " bowler " on the hall rack as usual, but after dining discovered that it had disappeared. The only " cadey " that remained on the pegs represented that aggressive emblem of respectability— the tall silk hat. He complained, but the landlord said he had better take what was left, and as it fitted him, he did so. His changed appearance provoked mirth among the Wellingtomans f\e met that night and next day, but he merely Bmiled good humouredly. Four times did he hang that headgear on the hotel rack, but its owner, for some un accountable reason, never claimed it, and our local friend then brought it home with him. • • • A bookseller not unknown along the Quay stood on •' the other side of the way 1 one Sunday recently when a largely attended Nonconformist school came out. To a friend he remarked, > u Look at the opposition we of the book and* newspaper trade have to put up with from the Sabbatarians, and yet these same people are crying out about Sunday trading and tramming I " What he drew attention to waß the ntunber of children, youths, and maidens, and even grown-ups, who carried well-known and popular magazines and weekly illustrated papers under their arms. It appears that not a few of the Wellington Sunday Schools do a big trade in English serial publications, which are distributed every month. They are obtained through the Sunday School Union At job prices, and this custom has been in vogue throughout the colony for at least twelve years. Little wonder the booksellers complain, but so far as the Lanck is aware, they have never entered any protest against the practice. ♦ * » A comedy in one smile was playeu in ■Cuba-street one day last week. A w.ellknown citizen, espying his wife strolling past a draper's shop— a most unusual -thing for a woman — hurried on behind, and placing his hand on her shoulder whispered into her shell-like ear as they walked alone— "Hello w, little Twopenny, so glad I dropped across you. I've invited Mr. and Mrs. to dinner ; slip home and " "Go away, man! How dare you?" said the indignant woman, as she smacked his face with a parasol. It some other man's wife! Bugler Dunne, the hero of the first Tugela fight, has gained profit as well as popularity by his bravery. Money gifts have poured in upon him from all quarters, and his bank-book shows a balance of nearly £300 in his favour, all accumulated in this way. As has already been recorded, the Queen, when she commanded his presence at Osborne, gave him a bugle. A Brighton lady has promised him a birthday gift every year, and among other presents has been a goat that chews tobacco, and is now the pet of the drummer boys in the regiment to which Dunne belongs.

Clever Clifford Walker intends touring the colony as a monologuist, and the "Lance" hears that he appeared to advantage the other evening at the Savage Club meetilng in Christchurch, when the Governor was the guest of the evening. The gentlemanly actor, it is little known, was, up till the time of his coming out to Wellington for his health's sake, playing old man parts in the Haviland-Coleridge Dramatic Company, with which company he toured South Africa. Haviland was for very many years Henry Irving's righthand man, and Miss Coleridge (Mrs. Haviland) is one of England's best leading ladies in legitimate parts. The South African tour, in which Clifford Walker took part, was cut short by the Jamieson Raid. "Plain Bill" Holloway was a member of the company, and he and Haviland took up arms and attended drill for the anticipated trouble, at which time Walker was in hospital at Capetown. During the raid the company was located at Johannesburg, and -never closed the theatre's doors during the whole of that exciting time. If you want to hear enthusiastic praise of players and playing, just ask Clifford Walker what he thinks of the Havilands.

Mr. De Latour, of the Masterton Fish Ponds, is one of the much-travel-led. There are few men know more of fish and fishing. As a raconteur, he is, naturally, immense. On one occasion, iv Ireland no less, he entertained a. well-known, if somewhat eccentric sporting nobleman. The peer imbibed too freely, but on getting outside he ordered his gamekeeper to hold up his stick, 100 paces off, and raising his rifle, let bang, and promptly smashed the stick in the middle. From the emerald banks of Irish streams to the desert plains of Africa, Mr. De Latour carries one with the charm of a delightful traveller who has _ observed keenly, with a racy appreciation of the genuine sportsman. * • • A suffering husband, just out of hospital and penniless, sued his wife in a Southern Court for maintenance. The Magistrate, however, didn't view his application with favour, and advised. him to hustle round and look for work. And yet the confiding idiot had made over all his property to the woman of his heart, who promptly turned him out when she had made certain of his life savings !

Wellington Sabbatarians have been enjoying; a season of Sunday school' anniversaries lately. One school offered a prize for the best essay upon a Script ire subject, and Bright Henry brought* along his effort. The teacher was a bit critical, and tod B.H. that the composition was worthy of him. ! "Why ? What's the matter ,wth it??' asked trie boy. "What's wrong?" ."Why, everything's wrong — the rhetoric,- the. logic, the style, and the facts." "Whew! won't dad be mad when I tell him that!" "Never mind," consolingly added the teacher, "you can tell your father that you did your best." "Did my best — did my best!" laughed Bright Henry ; "why, that's dad's essay— every word of it!" * # #

His Handicap. He wooed her when they both were poor, 'twas then he won her,, too ; She cheered him when the days were drear, and toiled to help him through ; She taught him things from books that he had failed to learn in youth. She got him to avoid the use of words that were uncouth ; She took her jewel in the rough, she polished day by day, And with a woman's patience ground the worthless parts away. She turned him from a stupid clown to one whose mien was proud, She planted in his heart the Wish to rise above the crowd ; She planned the things he undertook, she urged him on to try, She gave him confidence to look for splendid things and high ; She bore the children that he loved, and toiled for them -and him, And often knelt beside her bed with'aching eyes and dim. She cheered him when the days iiver© dark, and when the skies were bright, She saw^him ripe above the world and reach a noble height , Her brow is marred by many a line, she's bent and wan and old, He has a bearing that is fine, a form of noble mould ; And people say : " Poor man, alas 1 He's grown beyond his wife ; How sad that such a load should be attached to him for life ! " '* * * A holiday-maker arrested in Cbristchurch for drunkenness during the Carnival week waxed indignant because S.M. Beetham asked whether he was intoxicated. He replied with much, emphasis — "I was drunk, your Worship, of course — beastly drunk!" * * * Botorua is adding supernatural mysteries to its other attractions. According to a local paner, T a certain bpard|ng-house is haunted. White-clad figures, presumably ghosts, have been seen parading the corridors at a late hour and indulging in a game apparently after the style of football. Upon the ejaculation of such a phrase as "There's >a man-,? .th^- ghosts disappear, at the same time emitting faint feminine shrieks. Very strange, and yet not very unnatural, considering the ways of women.