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New Zealander, Volume XVIII, Issue 1718, 27 August 1862, Page 6

How the Gout came— ‘‘That pain which yoa feel in the joint of your great toe,” quote Monsieur Gout, “ has, yon flatter yourself, become rather less since eight o’clock, when you took your last dose of colchicnm. Quite a mistake, my dear sir! The member is, if anything, more swollen and inflamed than before. Deserve, now—l shall take the liberty of inserting this little awl, just by the way of probe. Aha! it makes you wince ! A very good sign that, however, since it proves that there is no ground for apprehending immediate mortification. Now, do you know why it is that your toe is so singularly sensitive ? I’ll tell yon. You remember, three years ago, ordering a batch ol burgundy ? Previous to that time you had been in very good health, for you had plenty of occupation and little leisure for gluttony or wine-bibbing ; your means were limited, and daring the holidays you took a sufficiency of pedestrian exercise. Really, in those days I never expected to have the pleasure of making your acquaintance. I considered you just the kind of fellow likely to become an ornament of the Alpine Club. But your estimable uncle, old Jones the stockbroker—bless you, I knew him very well indeed! many a time have I chatted to him when he was roaring like an aggravated bullock—your old nncle Jones, I say, died and left yon his money—you are not going to sleep, are you ? Well, I call that rather unhandsome treatment, considering that I have taken thepains to come here and bear you company! A slight loach of the pincers may, however—aha ! all’s right again; yon are lively as a snapping turtle. ’Whereabouts was I? Oh I remember. Old Jones left yon his money, and you determined to take your ease. No one can blame you for that. What’s the use of fagging to make more when you are already in posession of a cool too thousand a year, and may indulge in a shooting b® and hunters. Bat you never could make up a respectable bag on moors, and on horseback yon were anything but a Ducrow. You preferred Hvingin town, took chambers in the Albany, gave nice little Ttekerebt dinners, and laid in that stock of burgundy to which I have already alluded. It was of fine vintage, strong and heady, made the blood circulate in the veins like lightening. To it I attributed the honour of onr fist introduction ; though port and claret, not to menD® sundry kinds of delicious entremenU, did andonbMJ contribute to lessen the distance between us, Then you took to late hours, hot rooms, ecarte, almost justly included in the catalogue of fashionable pleasures; and our acquaintance, at first only slight, has now ripenw into permanent friendship. But I really must not allow ray feelings to divert from the scientific pmpt® for which I have visited you to-night. D®t M afraid ! I shall lay aside awl and pincers, ana the experiment by injecting a few drops of moliea 1® between the flesh and the bone. Ha! whit enviable yell! Your lungs, I can assure yon, are u perfectly healthy state, and may last you for the &• twenty years if you don’t force me to get into J®* stomach. By the way, what a silly proverb Off against pushing things to an extremity! It 8 the extremities that I always make a point of in the first instance, and I take it that very fewp»P* would wish me to depart from the practice. ’■‘® , it that you say ? Yon wish that I would 6° M devil. Pardon me for hinting in reply that yt» both rude and unreasonable. lam here, as yew know, in consequence of yonr indiscretions.’ —ow ' wo< d\ Magazine. . . Mr. Train’s street tramway was condemns nuisance at the late Surrey assizes, the jury u “5 found that Sir. Train, who laid down the tram, , the Lambeth vestry who allowed him, were guilty of a nuisance; but a point of law was t*. in the case of the vestry, and sentence was postf 0 . on both. Hence arises a carious complication, tramway cannot be removed till judgment is and judgment is refused to be passed till the p® law is decided, and the point of the law cannot cided without long and tedious previous nrga The Court of Queen’s Bench, before whom iw "f was brought on the 12th May, suggested that to P secutors should give up the prosecution as a ? ai °’. [Q vestry, in which case they would at once prow- j give judgment against Mr. Train and have the settled; but to this again the prosecutors demo, fear evidently being that the costs of the suit quite safe unless the members of the vestry are , liable. The Court refused to proceed against • Train until the case of the vestiy is disposed oi, the matter remains in its previous uncertainty. Mb. Justice Boothbt.— ln the House o mons, on the 23rd of May, Mr. Childers inf l L fr the Under-Secretary for the Colonies, what ac . I Majesty’s Government had taken in regard to jF tions from both Houses of Parliament in Sou tralia, praying her Majesty to remove Mr. , Boothby from the bench of South Australia, » whether there would be any objection to p . £ correspondence between Governor M'Donne . Duke of Newcastle on the subject of those pe Mr. Fortcscue said his noble friend had not g his duty to advise the Crown to accede to t contained in the address of the two Houses moval of Mr. Justice Boothby. The papers were v j bulkv, but if the bon. member would allow » „ make a selection from them, which would be _ tho parties concerned, he wonld ag rae 1 . -.l Mr. Childers said ho wonld be quite satisfied selection.