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Nelson Evening Mail, 27 January 1881, Page 2

- A most usef ul invention . for nursery use, called a " baby- washer," is announced by a paper j and the inventor describes hia infant machine as follows : — " You simply insert the begrimed and molasses-coated infant in an orifice, which can be made any required size by turning for four minutes a cog-wheel with electric attachments; The child glides gently down a highly polished incline plane. His lips are met at its terminehce by an india rubber tube, from wbich the infant can • raw actual nourishment of the pureit and most invigorating character, secured for the special purpose . at great expense from 8 choice breed of the Alderney kind raised on the estate of Her Majesty the Queen in the Isle of Wig|it. While in this compartment, which has plate glass mirrors, the perturbed spirits of the infant are soothed by its frantic efforts to demolish its own image reflected in the glass with a nicel-plated combined toothcutter, nail-knife, rattle, and tack hammer, which is thrust into baby's hand by an automaton monkey. Fatigued by its destructive efforts, the infant falls asleep, while the organ attachment plays softly the ravishing melody of " Put me in my little bed." Then it slips into the third compartment. Here the body is washed. Another small tube administers a dose of soothing syrup, and the infant glides from the machine, its nails pared and its hair Combed, if it has any, ready for the habiiirhents rendered necessary by the fall of our first parents." Referring to Mr George North's recent escapade, the Auckland Herald says : — " Is there a moral to this story ? Well, perhaps there is. It is just this : People should not put their guineas into speculative trausac tions in which they are open to be defrauded by the recipient of the coin, without hope of legal remedy against him. If they do, and are swindled by the absconding of the recipient of the money, they have themselves to blame. That is what we say to those who have been cheated by George North. But George North nevertheless deserves to be branded upon tbe back as a common cheat, a wholesale embezzler, and absconding thief, who has brought home the spectacle to every door of triumphant rascality, with the law on its side, mocking at the victims it has made." For downright gushing there are few men can beat Mr (late Judge) Weßton. The following is a fair sample of his effusions since he was made aware that the Government were about to dispense with his services. It is in reply to an address presented to him by the residents in Reefton: — "My dear Sir— l hasten to acknowledge the receipt of the flattering address which you and a large proportion of the population of Inangahna have been so good as to send to me at this place. At the termination of a long judicial career it is gratifying that men of all classes, creeds, and shades of opinion are prepared to join in such a handsome tribute of respect and regard. Nevertheless, such a manifestation of feeling causes me to realise to tho full that a Judge is but human; and to regret that, however learned, just, painstaking, merciful, and appreciated he may be, sometimes through fallacious reasoning, errors of judgment, and may be undue haste, his awards and punishment may prove to bo mistaken, and perhaps oppressive. With all ray many shortcomings, however, I always endeavored to preserve the honor and dignity of the British Bench at this remote corner of the earth, to protect the weak against tho strong, to temper justice with mercy, that I might vindicate my elevation to the judgment seat, and prove myself to be no unworthy member of the New Zealand bar." A surgeon in Hobart Town summoned a butcher for a large sum for attendance on hip wife, but the butcher said the medico was a bungler, and that through his want of skill his wife died. Three other doctors (certificated ones) supported the butcher's view in the evidence they gave, and the verdict was that the money Bhould not be paid. Nice for the j surgeon. His Honor Mr Justice MoleßWorth ex- I presses in rather plain terms his diaapproba- j tion' of the verdict of a jury returned in the Melbourne Criminal Court in th« case of j two young men named Leiah and Phipps, charged with assault and robbery in company of a Chinaman, at Hotbam, on the 4th inst. The evidence for the prosecution was very strong. Witnesses testified to aeeing the offence, and keeping the prisoners, who were fully identified, in view until they were overtaken by the police, after a pursuit of five hours, and placed in custody. His Honor directed the jury to find upon the j facts of the case, and when they returned witb l " Not Guilty," he exclaimed in surprise, " What, no robbery ?" To this the foreman replied, " No sir," whereupon his Honor, witb evident indignation, said. " I must express my distinct disapprobation of the verdict If the principal witness had been a European instead of a Chinaman, the verdict would have been different. As it is, it is a positive disgrace to the country." The Melbourne Exhibition has induced a large number of the New Zealand bucolics to leave their homes to see what the world on the other side is like. A few weeks since a party of excursionists from Auckland passed through Sydney to Melbourne, and whilst in the former city one of them went into a boot shop for a pair of pumps, when the shop boy looked carefully at bis foot from toe to heel, and said very gravely, "I am afraid, my man, that you mistake the nature of this establishment; it is a bootmaker's shop, not a boat builder's." A certain little girl up town lived with tv/o aunts, one married, with a whole lot of children, and lota of worry and bother, and the other single and having quite a comfortable time teaching school. The child one day threw her doll aside and assumed an attitude of profound thought, which was interrupted at last by the question, " Well, Julia, what are you thinking about ? " when the childlet loose a ten-acre lot full of crude philosophy by answering .'I was finking whevver, when I growed up, I'd teap stool cr have a baby."— Cincinnati Times. An olid writer in the time of Queen Elizabeth says in regard to mines and speculators :— ' A mineral man should be a hazard adventurer, not esteeming much whether he , hit or miss. If he happen to win he must esteem it as nothing ; if he loses iill yet he must think he has got something.' (No doubt the old gentleman meant 'experience,') llf he find a rich vein let him not esteem it, for it is like a man stung with a nettle.' (Itching for more, of course) Another writer of tho same era says : — ' When mines hit, it is the best got gear in the world it is so profitable to all and hurts none, and when they hit not, although it be lost for a time, God is hereby honored in searching his hidden treasures out of the depths of the earth.' To preserve the complexion.— Plenty of outdoor exercise, a well-regulated appetite, and a cheerful mind aro the best defence against the "green and yellow " hue which gradually creeps over tho roses on the cheekß of so many of our countrywomen. A. curious meeting occurred on board the steam launch Era on the 15th ult., when Sir Arthur Kennedy stepped on to her from the Cotopaxi. A mutual recognition between him and the coxswain, they having been : wrecked together in the steamer Forerunner i twenty years ago, and never having met i since,

An extensive land owner residing near Wallingford, a thriving little town fr Berkshire, writes complaining that " landlords ar& at last beginning to feel fh= shoe pinch." He states that many ptcple imagine that the return of a "percentage" is a universal custom in England. Such may be the case ; but liiifortunately for the landlord no such I return is ever mado without tho fact being published throughout the country in which he lives ; on the other hand, nothing is heard of tho landlord who makes no abatement, except tbat his land ifl \o let and he cannot find tenants. Estates arc strictly entailed, charged with settlements, and encumbered with mortgaged During the days > of prosperity their outgoings could be /airly met, now they are fixed and unalterable, and all is changed. Interests on the mortgages, and the charges created by settlements have to be paid in full, while rents are reduced or unpaid, thereby leaving the owner no capital to improve his estate ; and even if he had capitai, he has no interest in expending it for the benefit of his successors. He cannot sell a part of it, pay off his debts, and start afresh, because the whole of it is entailed. After dealiag with many other lacid-owners' grievances, our correspondent concludes: " It may not be generally known that half the land of England is owned by gentlemen who are mere nominal owners— powerless to improve their estates or to profit by improvement." ,_ „ In China, during the summer months, all kinds of vegetable refuse are mixed with turf, straw, grass, peat, weeds, and earth, collected into heaps, and, when quite dry, set on fire. After several days of slow combustion the entire mass is Converted into s kind of black earth. This compost is only employed for the manuring of seed. When seed time arrives one man makes holes in the ground* another follows with the seed, which he places in the holes, wbile the third adds this black e&tih. The young seed planted in this manner is enabled to push its rootlets through the hard, solid soil, and to collect its mineral constituents. The S uth Canterbury Times is responsible for the following ;— "A son of Mr W. G. Allen, of this town, was engaged (he other day in the juvenile pastime of kite-flying, when he was father astonished at a sudden change in the appearance of the tail of his kite, the appendage becoming visibly enlarged and of a densely black color. The youthful genius had read of Benjamin Franklin drawing lightning from the clouds, and, elated at the prospect of some wonderful scientific discovery, he proceeded to explore the phenome non by drawing in his flyer. His amazement, if not disappointment, may be imagined when, on reaching the ground, he found tbat a young hive of fugitive bees were clustered to the apparatus. Bees, when swarming, select curious" sites at times, but this is the first instance, of which we are aware, of a hive swarming on the tail of a kite in mid air." The Dunedin Morning Herald asks, and very pertinently, what is the use of exhibitions such as those recently given by Edwards, the long-distance pedestrian ? The exhibition Was neither amusing nor exciting, the only incidents— if We accept the occasional playing of the band — Were his stopping to drin k, and the changing of a figure on the black-board as each mile was completed. It would have been as great a punishment to : most people to watch the walker for a couple I of hours, as it would have been to them to i sit for an equal time listening to a dull political speech or a dry thoelogical discourse. It may be said that the trial was valuable, as showing the powers of endurance of the human frame ; but we believe that men in the discharge of their ordinary duties arc constantly giving far more striking proofs of that power than can be stiown m a two days' walking match. We most confess our inability to discover what pleasuro can be derived from witnessing the exertions of Edwards, or any similar feats of endurance. Whore two or more men arc striving together for the mastery, there is some reason for interest in the success or the defeat of (he competitors, but in the case of Edwards' feat, what comfort can anyone derive from the knowledge that while ho himself is sleeping this man is plodding round and round the Garrison Hall, the only witnesses being a sleepy scorer, and a still more sleepy barman, and possibly a wide-awake policeman. The Chicago Tribune recapitulates (ho results of the great storm on the lakes on October 16th. Over half a million dollars' worth of damage has boon done to vessels and cargoes, and 92 persons hare perished ; 17 vessels were totally wrecked, involving a loss of 153,000d015, and 06 vessels were damaged. Referring to the oft-discussed question of " What is libel ?" an English contemporary says : — " Perhaps some journalists who have the fear of the libel law constantly in mind may find a useful hint in the following anecdote : In the reign of Queen Elizabeth, oue Peter Palmer, of Lincolns Inn, brought an action against a barrister of the name of Boycc, for having, with the intention to injure him in his name and practice, said. ' Peter Palmer is a paltry lawyer, and hath as much law as a jackanapes.' It was moved in arrest that the words would not maintain an action, because they were not slanderous. Had Mr. Boyce said, ' Mr. Palmer had no more law than a jackanapes,' it had been actionable, for then he had lessened tbe opinion of hie learning. But the words were 'he hath as much law as a jackanapes.' This was no impeachment of his learning, for every man that hath more law than a jackanapes hath as much. Judge Berkely says it has been adjudged, where a person said of a lawyer that he had as much law as a monkey, that the words were not actionable, because he hath as much law, and more law also than a monkey. But if he had said he hath no more law than a monkey, these words would have been actionable." Telegraphing from Rome ou December 1 st, the correspondent of the London Da*!;/ News says : — At one this morning a fire broke out in the Government tobacco factory in Naples. The fire proceeding from the ground floor, which was moreover difficult of access, the case from the first was hopeless, and the efforts of the authorities was directed to localising the ravages of the conflagration, with which view the neighboring houses were demolished, and thirty pumps were brought to bear on tho burning edifice. The streets were encumbered with debris, iind swarms of wretched men, women, and children were weeping about tho scene of tho disaster. Besides the firemen numerous troops and marines were called out, and the clergy, with the Archbishop at their head, were on the spot, seeking to relieve the most pressing distress. The damages amount to several millions ; but as all was insured the Government will suffer no loss. The chief sufferers are the hundreds of men and women thrown out of employment. Eight firemen were injured. A singular affair happened in Wellington on Monday evening last, about six o'clock, in the cutting leading from the Tinakori-street, and known as Upper Sydney-street. Twelve bullocks were being driven by two men along the former road on their way from Karori to a butcher, when, on reaching tbe cutting, they took it into their bovine heads to rush pell mell into tbe cutting, scattering men, women, and children in affright before them. One of the bullocks was precipitated on the top of a shed belonging to Mr Thomas Redman, and below the level of the roadway, the result being that the roof was stove in and the animal stuck fast, his front legs sticking up in ihe air in a ludicrous fashion. Ultimately he was extricated, and with his companions safely driven into town. "Does oat grain alter in weight pcr'busbel by keeping ?" is a question which, if put to Agriculturists is variously answered. Perhaps the general opinion is that the grain does go in quantity, but becoming drier, harder, and firmer, is heavier per bushel. The opportunity afforded to test this point was taken advantage of lately. Having ascertained the weight per bußhel when cut, without dressing as for market or for seed, the grain from Aboyne was kept for five weeks thinly spread on a floor and then put in small bags, Bnd again weighed. In each case tbe total weight was less, and the weight per bushel was also less. Wheat aud barley being much heavier, however, than water, will by losing wnter, probably in every case increase in weight per bushel; while the oats being just about the same weight as wnter (rather heavier when plump, lighter when long), will, in the case of fine quality, probably increase in weight per bushel hy keeping, but inferior quality will decrease in weight per pwheJ.,r-_Vpr# British [Agricul luruf,