POLITICS ON BOB-TAIL CREEK.

Nelson Evening Mail, Volume XV, Issue 261, 27 December 1880, Page 4

POLITICS ON 808-TAIL CREEK.

" I'll toll ye what, this 'ere Crowbar City needs an' must hev," said Slathers Johnson, as lie mounted a barrel and looked around on the miners. "We want a city government-— a Common Council — a body to make ordinances an' enforce 'em — a — a — " Tbe rest of his speech was drowned by the cheers of the crowd. It wns in '56, and Crowbar City was a collection of shanties and buls on Bob-Tail-Creek) in Nevada. Wo were doing well enough, and the camp was very peaceful and quiet, Slathers Johnson was tho laziest miner in the camp, but was looked uj) to as a, great politician. Back in tho State, he had boon a constable, overseer of highway. , tax collector, school inspector, and so on, but yet his hankering was not satisfied. It was finally decided that Crowbar City lie divided into eight wards, and that each ward be eeiiticd to one Alderman, while ». Mayor, Treasurer, and Clerk should be eleckd at, large. There were about four huts or tents to a Avard, with a constituency of from five to eight persons for each Alderman. " How shall we pureeed to elect ? " blandly inquired Slathers as he remounted on (he barrel. There was a dead silence for a minute, and then Racoon Bill of the bloody Sixth Ward, threw his old hat ou the grouud, pulled out his shooter and kindly inquired : " Ar thai-' any buzzard here from my ward who don't think I'd make a howlin' old Alderman ? If thar' ar' let him edge up this way for about ten seconds !" No one edged and Racoon Bill was declared the unanimous choice of the electors of his ward. Several others elected themselves in the same off-hand manner, and there was no trouble till Blue Clay Smith said he thought he could represent the Eighth Ward übout as well as any other resident, vulture. If not, why not ? Three resident vultures at once stepped forward to contest his election, and there was a four-handed ! fight Avhich lasted ten minutes and was do cided in favour of Cross- Eyed Turner, of Ohio. Slathers was (hen elected Mayor by acclamation, as were also the other officers, and (lie largest hut in town was cleaned oufc for a meeting of ■ the Common Council. The eight Aldermen sat on the ground in a circle, and then the Mayor sat in the centre ou a bag of meal, and opened the session by saying : " Has any Alderman any motion to make ?" "I 'spose a moshun lhat this 'ere 'onorablo body purvide itself with a bar'l of whisk y at ihe expense of lhe city would be in order." remarked the Alderman from tlie ').' 'rd. " Not by a durnea sight !" bawled one of (he crowd at the door. " Order ! Order ! or I'll bust a dozen beads out there !" shouted the Mayor. " See here, old boss, hain't you puttin' on a heap o' style fur the fust meetin ?" asked the Alderman from the Sixth as he leaned forward. "There's a moshun pendinT' answered the Alderman from the '1 bird. " Which 'ere moshun is as follers !" remarked the Alderman from the firet as he hit the chap from the Sixth on the ear. There was a little performance of •'eight hands round and the Mayor in the middle," and it was fifteen minutes before order was restored. Then the Alderman from the Fourth shoved his bitten finger into his pocket and baid: "My constituents, who ar' among the heaviest taxpayers in the city, believe that the price of washin' is too blamed high, an' they demand—" " A\ 7 hen did you ever have any washin' done ?" interrupted the Alderman from the Seventh. " Gi. the drop on hira, Bill !" yelled a man at the door. "Order! Tite Mayor commands order !" shouted Slathers. Tbree shots were fired, four or five Aldermen knocked down, and when the cyclone passed everybody had his shooter od his knee. "Wben interrupted, we war' about to take up the order of unfinished business,' remarked the Mayor as he nursed his bitten ear. " 1 move that we adjourn ! ! ' " Adjourn ho blowed !" " Question !" "Ayes and noes !" " Order !" "Some onery coon out thar' has ticked my dog !"said the Mayor asthe yelps of a canine rosa above all other sounds down, ye old he-wolf !" yelled Bomeone, and at; that the light was upBet and the circus began. We locked the door on the crowd and got under cover of the rocks but that house could' n't hold 'em. In five minutes they were fighting all over town, and every ward had a rally and a knock-down. It was four weeks before all the bullets were dug out and the broken heads healed up. Slathers lost an ear and two fingers, and his farewell message, was brief. He wrote : " Aldermen : Fame is a mockery, office is degradin,' and I resign in favour of any coyote you kin agree on. Bomans, farewell. I came, I saw, and got chawed !" But Crowbar City had had enough of politics. — Detroit Free Ftess.