THE CHOOSING OF A PROFESSION.

Nelson Evening Mail, Volume IX, Issue 150, 25 June 1874, Page 2

THE CHOOSING OF A PROFESSION.

" Snyder " through the medium of the Auckland Herald has been giving the young people of the colo_y a littlo advice. Some of the youngsters addressed may not perhaps see the full force of his remarks, but many of the older colonists will be able to appreciate them. He discourses thus :— <

Dear Children, — I call you dear, because, and in good sooth, you are very dear, ns your parents can bear testimony when at regular intervals the bills for your necessities are sent in to be paid for at intervals not regular, or as experience sometimes shows, regularly not paid at all.

My dear children, the future is all before you. You live in a free country. There is no condition in life— colonial life I am speaking of — your aspirations may not lead you up to. Of ; all pursuits likely to be followed by ultimate success, there is none I know of equal to the professional politician. Politics may be learned as you may learn to be a doctor, or a lawyer, or a blacksmith. You have only got to apply yourself under some competent master, and with patience, perseverance, and industry, your end will be accomplished. It requires no great capacity; it incurs no losses or risks; it does not call for any special qualifications beyond great assurance and unbounded confidence in yourself; the art (not difficult of acquirement) of talking clap-trap, nnd promising to do generally what you have discovered it is people want you to do.

Many years ago — in another colony of which you should know a great deal, but do nor, because your schoolmasters and schoolmistresses eDgage your time and exercise your memories in learning about far distant countries which very few of you nre ever likely to visit — I knew two boys. They went to school with me, and were very clever. They had a nice and taking manner with them. They won all the other boys' marbles and buttons. They gambled Everton taffy and sweatmeats against otber boys' marbles and buttons, always and ever getting the best of the bargain. I thought then, and I know since, that it was not altogether in the way of fair play; but then they were so plausible and specious that none of the boys with whom they had transactions ever suspected them in the least. They made such sweet promises too; and when reminded of them, excused themselves in such a charming affable offhand manner, that it was quite pleasant to hear how tbey did it. And I have since said in my heart, these are the materials which go to make politicians and statesmen. And so it came to pass tbat after a time the lads grew into men, when (never mind how or by what means) they got into Parliament, and in duo course became Ministers, with good fat salaries. nnd handsome travelling allowances. Then, from a condition of poverty and indebtedness they rose high in the world, and wero esteemed greatly by their fellow-men. They kept men-servants and maid-servants, ; and rode in carriages, and steamed about in ships, which caused many to admire and wonder, whilst others fell to thinking and reflecting.

There were they who wondered where the money came from to compass such things, until they brought themselves to believe that the people of the colony were paying for such luxurious and costly Ministers out of their own pockets, and that the money would never return to them again.

But these statesmen, by the making of large gifts, aod the creating of fine sin .cures, and the offering of rich emoluments, succeeded in drawing around them large numbers of friends and supporters, who assured the constituencies that everything was quite right, and everything what it should be, and nothing else. So; although not altogether convinced, tbe people did no more than indulge in a constitutional growl. And the statesmen went on

from one gigantic and costly undertaking to another, until they protested they were making the colony the brightest gem in her Majesty's possessions..

In the meantime they still go about followed by their men-servants and their maid-servants, in carriages and steamboats, and there is nothing like unto them to which they can be compared.

It is a nice thing, my dear children, to be a statesman, and if you will only follow the advice I shall give (advice which no one gave me until it was too late) you will io time be able to become one, and draw your ever so many hundreds of pounds a year, while creating for yourself a commissionersbip to full back upon as a lucrative permanency when the people turn ingrates and supplant you with one whose popularity is in the ascendant at the time your star is on the wane and sinking below the horizon.

A candidate for political honors and emoluments requires nothing beyond the possession of a twenty shilling miner's right, or his name on the electoral roll, than which nothing is easier to obtain. You, if you only work the thing properly, can always run au account with your newßpaper for advertising and posters — your committee will see you clear of such an insignificant responsibility.

But, my dear children, you must not fail to bear iu.miud, when entering into politics as a profession by whioh you hope to maintain yourself, that it is

absolutely necessary to lay down certain fixed rules for your guidance, or you may come to grief.

The first golden rule is, that you must be all things to all men.

If, for instance, you stand fur a constituency composed chiefly of miners, you must advocate the sacrificing of everything in favor of mining interests. You may know nothing—probably do know nothing — of mining; perhaps never saw a goldfie'd. That is of no consequence. Say you have. You must impress upon the miners that they are the thew and sinew, the bone, muscle, and marrow of the colony, and that it is a burning shame and a disgrace to our statesmanship that they should be made to pay a license fee to dig gold. Ask them why this should be an exception. If a license fee to dig gold, then why not a license fee to dig turnips and potatoes? (I have heard this little bit of bunkum tell with amazing force.) Promise the diggers that the gold duty shall be abolished, that they shall be allowed to go where they like, to turn men off their farms and go in, on to, or under them at will without any compensation being made. You are bound to be returned, unlesß, indeed, some one who opposes you promises more, when of course he will be sure to get the better of you.

Let me, in passing, here offer you a hint. You can tell landlords to send in your account after the poll, which you can settle at your convenience. Remember this — they cannot sue.

But it mny be tbat you stand for an agricultural district In that rase you throw the miners overboard. You must talk about the man. who can make two blades of grass grow where only one grew before, or two cabbngea sprout where no cabbages ever sprouted before, and all that sort of thing, you know; such as hearths and homes; desiring that every man should live under his own vine and fig-tree, and become tho owner of his own piece of land, with his wife at his Bide, and his blooming children around him. Wrap this up nicely, and won't it tell? Say, that ii returned, it will become your duty, as it will be your inclination, to insist that that there shall be free selection of land before survey, with a bonus added for occupation, and tbat tbe tax upon imported grain and flour shall be doubled; that there shall be an immigration of a kind to bring out cheap labor; that the bloated squatter shall cease to monopolise the land which was intended for the virtuous, industrious tiller of the soil, who is now, by a corrupt and vicious Government, trodden down, crushed, and impoverished.

You will certainly go in at the top of the poll, unless some opponent gets topper by promising more.

In standing for towns and cities it will be your business to ascertain the country and creed of the majority of the electors, when you will not fail to take such steps as will secure you the votes and interests of that country and creed, while you will be careful in priva.e conversation to conciliate the clasß who are not indentifiod with them.

Advertise and placard extensively. Run up a large bill for both, and give it to be understood that payment will depend upon your success, when your return is certain.

These have ever been my sentiments with regard to such matters.

I shall take it for granted that you are now able to write M.H.R. at the end of your name. What course you should pursue to rise to the height of your aspirations will form the subject of my next address.