WHO EATS THE OYSTERS?

Nelson Evening Mail, Volume VI, Issue 74, 29 March 1871, Page 2

WHO EATS THE OYSTERS?

To the Editor of the Nelson Evening Mail. Sir — Were I a politician, I might perhaps be asking some such question as — Who put; back {he clock ? — but, I refrain from doing so, because, in the first, place, I don't care to know, and secondly, because it is unpleasantly suggestive of ?iisis <iud mandamuses, aud such like high sounding terms, all of which, however, have the same meaning, namely, "stump up." On the whole, then, I prefer to content myself with a much more harmless and pertinent enquiry, and so, I now ask, Who cats the oysters? Ever since I heard that six bairs of these delicious bivalves had been lodged at the Police Station, Fancy has amused herself with wafting to my delighted nostrils the savory odor that arises from oysters scalloped, and oysters stewed, causing — as was the case with the Bobo of Elia, when he was, for the first time, about to partake of tho crackling of roast pig — a premonitory moistening to overfiowjmy nether lip. I take a deep interest, in'. /lyase oysters. In three days' time anybody iwj.ll be allowed to catch as many as he .'pleases, but then they will have lost all the attractions of a prohibited delicacy. Eve hadlat her disposal more garden produce thaw she could possibly eat, and yet she was noj; satisfied until she had tasted of the forbiddejn fruit. I ought perhaps to bo ashamed of it, but I admit that lam a true daughter of' hers, and therefore I long for those oysters, chiefly because they are out of season. Who has eaten them ? Has the Magistrate who fined the man, who, "in order to save them from being washed away hy the floods," brought them to what he hoped was a profitable market ? Has the Inspector of Police who prosecuted him ? Has the Sergeant, who arrested him, had his share cf the juicy morsels ? Lover as I am of oysters cooked or oysters raw, such thoughts haunt me, and I should be everlastingly obliged to you if you would use your influence to have a kw dozfn of them left, previous to the first of April, at the Evening Mail office addressed to Yours hungrily, Mother o' Pearl.