The Manawatu Standard (PUBLISHED DAILY.) The Oldest Daily Newspaper on the West Coast.:. SATURDAY. AUGUST 22, 1885. LOCAL AND GENERAL.

Manawatu Standard, Volume X, Issue 71, 22 August 1885, Page 2

Manawatu Standard (PUBLISHED DAILY.) The Oldest Daily Newspaper on the WestCCoat.:.s t.: . SATURDAY. AUGUST 22, 1885. LOCAL AND GENERAL.

The football match Foxton v. Feilding will take place at the latter place on Saturday, sth September. Wellington wharf is now lit up with the electric light at night. '•What is the breed of your calf?" said a would-be buyer to a farmer. "Well," said the farmer, "all I know about it is that his father gored a justice of the peace to death and tossed a book ajent into the fence cor nor, and bis itother chased a female lecturer two miles, and if that ain't breed enough you needn't take him." The N. Z. Times says that Mr Daniel ClimiH. G.E., is pntiiijuiug Parliament for £2000, as compensation for services rendered m being the first to discovor a practical route, via Johnson ville, fur the Wellington and Manawatu Railway. The petitioner alleges that Mr Macaudrew, when Minister for Public Works, had assented to the stipulation that he Bhould reueive a bonus of £2000 if successful, as he claims to have been, m finding such route. Baron Moll wo, a Russian exile, has just arrived m Wellington, and intends to deliver a locturo on .Nihilism to-mor-row evening iv the Lyceum Flail. Tho Yost says that the Customs Department have presented the sum of £25 lo Inspector Goodull for the discovery of an illicit whisky still at Hawera some few months since. The discovery led to the conviction of four men, from whom die Government recovered fines amounting to £400, the whole of which impositions were paid. Other parties concerned m the seizure will al«o participate m the rewards offered for tho detection of the offenders, but to what extent has not transpired, Mr A. W. Brown's illness has, the Post regrets to learn, developed a new and fnore serious phase, which, m the opinion of his doctors, will make it more protracted than has been hitherto expected. It is now uioro than ever neceßßary that Mr Brown be kept as quiet as possible. Only his wife and uecessary attendants are allowed to see bun. We have to acknowledge from Messrs T. Kennedy Macdonald and Co. the receipt of their Lnnded Property Guide for Aneuar. It is needless to dwell on thn merits of this upefurnnd instructive book. The advertiKßment with referenco to the Guide will b« found on our first page. Of mines, the hiphest is thn silver mine of Potosi, m the Andes of Peru, which is stated as being 11.367 feet above th« Ifirel of the sf.a, and th* deepest mine is the salt mm« of Npiisalzw-rk, Westphalia, which is said to be 2,050 ft below the level of the sea. From 250 to 300 oats are destroyed jweekly during th« warm SMaon m Phil* delphia by the agent of th* Women's Branch of the City Refuge for Lost and Suffering Animals. They are snffof MiH with chfircoal gas. Last year over 7000 went this way. l Another instance of railway mistnan? ' agemonfc on the Wantranui section. On the 12th instant (s*ys tho Herald) a con pit of trucks of firpwood were nent from Halcornbe for a Wanernnui trader. They did not turn up until the 20th, and might not bavn been heard of then had not enquiries been made, when it was found that the trucks had heen shunted ntTurakina and allowed to remain there. There is a screw loose m the district management, The Napier Telegraph says r-r-A good story is told of thren Colonials who, feeling the want of a chance after many yearn of business, took a trip to the old country. They arrived m due course after the vo3 r age nt a well-known London terminus, and all three determined to go to a crtafn hotel, to which tit*y had been recommended by a f«llowpassenger from Australia. Hailingr a 'caVi, thuy directed cabby to drive utonce to the plqce at which they intended to " put up," at any rate for a time. Cabhy drove th*»m on. for the greater part of an hour. " This shows what a Wg place London is." said one. '• Ft does," said anothor. "Quite so," Baid tlie third, as the cab was pulled up at their destination. The fare (a fairly large one) having been duly paid, and cabhy having whipped up his horse and disappeared round the corner, the three Victorians found that the hotnl thay had enquired for and had just been landed at was just opposite tho railway station at which they had bnen alighted ! They had a hfcarty laugh at the time, and tell the i story with grfcixt good humour against ' themselves now they hay* returned to ■ tho colonies.

The Bruce Herald \iA<i been shown » very iii^viuous match >»x m vented and patented by Mr \V. A. llidiarddiui, of Oiitrum. A mi m bee of iiintchfs are (>uL into an aperture at thu suk;, and the tnucliiui! l>uiii£ wouud up, a drum m the m terior revolves, and on« solitary matcli sticks out at the top. Upon removing that, there is a whirr and another match protrudes, and so on until the supply is exhausted, or th« cloc't work runs down. The machine will l>o particularly valuable to publicans, who are often annoyed by customers who, after imbibing h limy; Blec;ver, coolly pocket the profits m the shape of a box or so of mutches if they gut the chance. It is a curious fact connected with deep mining that from the hours of 12 at night till 4 m the morning, the disturbing influences m the bowels of the earth obtaiu increased activity. At this time it is observed by miuwrs that water falls from places where none is observable during the day. The volume m tho-water-wheel is perceptibly increased, the atmosphere is charged with gases, which oft«>n prevent the lights from burning, and small particles of uarth are observed to fall from the tops of tho drives. The following was written to pnrpetiiate tho memory of a Yorkshire cook : — Underneath this crust ' Lieo the mouldering dust Of Eleanor Batchelor Shoveu, Well versed iv the arts Of pies, custards, and tarts, Aud the lucrative trade of the oven. When she lived long enough She made her last puff, A puff by her husband much praised, And now she dotli Ho And make a dust pie, In hopes that her crust may be raised. Mr J. H. Haukius is calling tenders for alterations and additions to his private residence Stoney Creok. Specifications may be seen at this office. The Dumbarton Herald of Ist July contains the followiug ; — " On Monday afternoon Messrs William Deuuy & Brothers, Leven Shiuyard, Dumbarton, launched a steel screw steamer ot about 2500 tons gross register for tho Union Steamship Company, of New Zealand. Tlih steamer, which on leaving the ways was named the Mararoa by Mrs John I Darling, is 320 feet iv length between perpendiculars, 42 feet breadth moulded aud 26 feet moulded debth. She has been constructed of ijituueus- Martin st«el under special survey of Lloyd's and is classed m their Registry 100 Al, thr«e decked. She is built with a continuous cellular bottom for water ballast, and has complete upper aud main decks, a lower deck forward and aft of machinery space, also a promenade deck over greater portion of vessel surmounted by a roof or shade deck. Saloon and stateroom accornodation of tho superior character invariably adopted by the Union Company will be. provided on the main and upper decks for 144 first-cl.-tss aud 109 second class passengers. While umlei construction the Mararoa has been under the inspection of Mr John Darling, Marine Superintendent for the Union S. S. Co. of New Zealand." Jarvis. the well-known South Australian wicket-keeper, has sent a telegram to Melbourne, offering to make one m the Australian eleven which it is intended to send to England at the invitation of the Marylebone Club. " What was all the scuffling about down-stairs?" asked Mrs liiluuqts, as her lord and master strode into the room. *' Nothing, except that masher asked !<»r Sarah Ann." "What did he say ?" Oh, he begun by saying ha was speaking from the bottom of his heart, aud so. on." "And what answer did you give ?" " I grew spasmodic, too," answered Hilboots, gently tapping his little angelic number twelve-shoe..; " and gave him au answer from the bottom of my sole." A singnlar fatility occurred the other day at Sandhurst. A married woman, named Shmnonds, a resident of St Kilda fell down m a bedroom at the Niagara Hotel, aud jammed her. neck between trie door and the bed-post. She was unablo to extricate herself and was suffocated. Charity hngins at home. — (iabo Snodgrass recently applied to the Rev. Aminidab, of the Blue Light Austin Tabernacle, for some pecuniaiy assistance. .'• I jess can't do hit," replied Parson Bledso ; " I has to sport my pore ole madder." {| But yer pore ole rn udder nays yer don't do n tiffin for her." " Well, don, if I dont do nnffin for my pore old nnidder, what's the use ob an outsider like you trying to make me shell out ?" Writers m the London Lancet call attention to the great value of hotwaUr applications to the head m cases of fainting or syncope. They sny, also, that a proper use of it, applied to the forehead with cloths, will very often avert such attacks. There wns a crowd m a railway station from which a train was about to depart ; and all at onco a man, who had put his hand m his under-coat pocket behind to take out his pockel-book and pay his fare, exclaimed, his face glowing with excitement ; " I've been robbed. Them are thieves about here ! Some viliao has taken my pocket-book from my pockot with over £100 m it!" " Where did you carry your pocket-book sir ?" inquired a by-stander. "In my under-coa* pocket behind." "Then, sir you can scarcely blame the individual who has taken it" replied he m a vory pompous, self-satisfied, patronising manner, and m a voice of warning, intendod for the ears of all within hearing: 11 Yes, you offer, if I 4 may say so, a temptation, a premium, sir, upon theft, by carrying your money m such a place. Now, I always carry mine here," he continued, putting his hand into ■an inside breast pocket r>r his coat," ard there it is always— M{ Rafe," he would havesaid, but he suddenly dr^w out his hand as if it had been bitten by an adder, anil eried 1 M Why my pocket-book is gone too." v : A certain noblo Scottish lord, who has been accustomed to go about Naples attended by a lnrge ferocions bulldog, having decided to ero to Rome, he nroceeded to the station, and took his place m a first-class carriage, the " dawc: " taking up a position on the seat opposite his master. The platform-inspector, with many gesf illations, declared that, the bulldog should not travel m a pas-senger-carriage. " Very well then, take him out !" was Lord X.'s quiet rejoinder. In vain the official expostulated ; Lord X. mnrply reiterated his former reply — a piece of advice which was not followed ; and apparently master of the situation, he threw himself back m his i seat and calmly lighted a cicar. But the Italians were not to be outdone, and, quietly detachins: the carriage m which the " English milor " was seated, they made up the train with another baggagecar and started it off. Lord X. sat quietly smoking a qnarter of an hour, and then, surprised at the delay, thrust hishaadoutof the window and demanded when the train was going to srart. His feelings when his situation was desoribed to him, may be imagined. We have to acknowledge the receipt from the Government Printer of another batch of Parliamentary papers, including' No. 17 of Hansard.