It Will Never be Flayed.

Manawatu Standard, Volume IV, Issue 218, 9 August 1884, Page 2

It Will Never be Flayed.

*By gum !' Mr and Mrs Defoe sat before a cheerful fire m their home the other evening. There had been a long period of silence, when Mr Defoe suddenly exclaimed as above. * What is it, my dear ?' she responded. 'Say, we've got tired of playing games, and what do you say to private theatricals V ' How V « Why, we'll get three or four of the neigh, bors to join m, and we'll meet at each other's houses and have regular plays.' 'That'll be Bplendid," she gasped. • Hanged if it won't. Wonder we never thought of it before. Twenty dollars will get us all the scenery we want and each can furnish, his own wardrobe. By gum !; We've got the idea now P ' What sort of a play could we play V she asked, as he marched up and down with a.' tragic step. * I have it - aha !* he exclaimed, as he stopped short. ' Don't you remember I started to write a play about five years ago? I'll finish it, and we'll bring it out. Sow, let's see how the characters run. There is the Count Dumdoff, who is m love with Geraldine' the Fair. I'll be the Count, as he is the hero. He 'kills four men, rescues Geraldine from several dangers, and there is a good deal of kissing and love-making', and a happy marriage! 1 ' And , I'll be Geraldine.' 'You! Oh, yon couldn't play that part. She must be young and vivacious. Let's see. "I think I'll cast you for Hannah, who keep* a bakery near a public park m Paris." * I'd like to see mysolf playing Haunah m a bakery, 1 would ?' she defiantly answered. *If you can play Dumkoff I know I can play Geraldiue.' 'Oh, no you can't, my love. You are a little stiff m the knees, and how you'd look throwing yourself into my arms as the villaius pursue. T shall cast that little widow D. for Geraldine.' 'Then there'll be two Geraklines of us. If you can play Dumdoff with your lame back and your catarrh, I know I can play Geraldiue with this little lameness m my left knee.' 'Now, you listen to reason, Mrs Defoe. You aren't built for Geialdine ; you are too fat ; your feet are too large ; you haven't the voice for it,' « And you'd make a pretty Count Dumdoff, you would,* *he , tired back. ' You want to get that orook out of your back, that bald head shingled over, your mouth repaired, and your eyes touched up with a paintbrush. I think I see you killing four villains ! Ha, ha, ha I* ' Woman, do not anger me,' he said m a deep-toned voice as he rose up, , ' Aud don't you anger your Geraldine; either!' 'Geraldine! Why» you don't know a sky border from a flat.' * Dnmdoii"! .And. you don't know a skye-tefriev' fro,m, the big fiddle m the qroheatra/' '<'Tfc weU-l We'll hare iio paying here. V Then you needn't. When 1 play Hanuah m a bakery, to let you hug*and kiss the widow D., or any other woman, all over the stage, you'll be three or four Count PumdohV I'll burn the play, jealous woman {' 'If you don't I will, vaia man! Then they sat down and resumed their former occnpation of looking into the fire, and the disturbed oat went back to her rag and her dreams. — Detroit Free Press.