News in a Nutshell.

Manawatu Standard, Volume IV, Issue 33, 8 January 1884, Page 2

News m a Nutshell.

—^:qo;-,-Better break thy woVd than do worse m keeping it. If you don't want to lose yoilr gun never let it go off. If individuals have no virtue?, their vices may warn us. • The miser Hires poor fcp die rich, and is the jailer of his house and the turnkey of liia 'wealth: ■ ■ • • . • . ■ Money is the great enigma of the age. Everybody is compelled to give it up. Don't you thipk the bride is foolish that ahe never marries the beat man 1 'The parting. giv#a you pain,' as the man said when he had a troublesome tooth extracted. In a nutshell.— 4 Yes/ says the reporter. ' I always^ oarry my copy m niy hat.' * I see,' replied Fogg, ' news m a nutshell.' The Worst Pun ever Made.—' Hallo, boy! Has your paper anything more about the earthquake ?' « bio, sir; not m this kchia.'— Louisville Courier- Journal. Mr Richardson, a Nelson solicitor, has not pleaded at the bar m vain. He led to the altar this morning Miss Johnston who has presided for the past few months at the bar of tbe Palmers ton Club hotel. The newly married couple leave for their home at Nelson this evening. • When does a; clock conceal itself P — When it gets behind time. The following id pxtraicted from a smart boy's composition on * Babied : * The mother's heart gives 4th joy at the baby's Ist 2th.' ; made of paper-aroused by the Japanese, and it is said that a man of 16Q pounds may stand on one without breaking it, ' . : ' .