News in a Nutshell.

Manawatu Standard, Volume IV, Issue 8, 7 December 1883, Page 2

News in a Nutshell.

: In old times barbers, used to pall teeth aind bleed people.. Now they talk them to death. .:_ ■ - h t /' ]" ';• ' \ 'Is there anything wrong in kissing f he asked her, as they stood together at the gate, ( , * Certainly, there is 'she replied, ' -or there wouldn't be, any |ua in jyU? He was riot up in the latest 'atyle^— He : ' Wiheimina, my 'dear, I found >^M» stockings lying across i ehair m ttuflgr* lour.'. She: * You dealt goosey l Whj t those are my nevihread gloves !' . . . . A preacher remarked recently that it ia said.^hat . Übeip,lisia\ is \ creeping; into ail churches. /If t^at M «o,' he continued. 'I hope it will soon strike the contriba* tipß^oxes** ; J r ' ; J c ' ; ' ,' Mr Whyte ' said a lawyef so a witnef« in; the box, *at the time these paper*! wire executed you • were spdcalatiog/ wereyort not*' <Yes sir.' f YoV#irt» in 1 oiM' ■• I .was^;» fAnafl: what toe" yot» ia now ?' « Baukruptoj/ , w^s the solama reply. • j A asked a bright little rir!, ' VThat country ris .opposite to us on the global n?on't know, sir,' was the answer. ' Weil now,'pursued thV.tcjaQlier, 'If I Were to bore- « hole through the '. earth, and you. were to go in at this «nd, where would . jotf fjOOinaLbut & - « Out of : the hole, sir,' repiia£ #0-; pupil, i with ran •: air, of triumph. ': A constable at a Sydney Polios Oourt, =when questioned as to the state of a prisoner, said, * He 1 was perfectly sober,' jour Worship : butsligbtlynnder the influence t pfliqubr^S; '■ ' - l ; ■' ' -'' For on* shop in Sydney a cdrisigutnent of cana'ri^i worth £LOU recently arri><id ' from England T r«rict the parrots and 1 oofckatoVs which the proprietor* ; receive aii« nually f rona Kiverina is ab»ut ;, A fleece of cross-bred 'ram hogget waa shown the other day at Wanganui. The animal was shorn as a lamb on the BthFebmary lastj ; and ajfter barely nine months whs shorn again a few days aeo, .witbj lth* astonishingly largfr yield of l&ittis Of WfiOl, , • .. : ■;> >; i.r.. .;',_-.■•? ■- . .-• Mr Whitson, who/Jately died in Anck* land, was the pldent^Freemason in New Zealand, and ; a mem wr ; of 3,t.. Andrew's Lodge;? 1 '.^ ;f " • -.:'-'u i^.^ .■'■■.. uuM , ■ .. Thftwhwtl«<if jjk. ioflpjnqUTe^lsiheard ||3dO y>r#' A the , noise '.of a |jraia ; 2890 yards, thi riaport of a 'teasket and the nark of a 'dog 1800 ysrdf,; thb roll of a drum 1600 yarap,' the cr6»k of a frog 000 yard?, a cricket's chip 800 yatds, and an iavitation to drink can be heard 4500 yards, by • loafer. , ' A ourious accident occurred to Mr Vincent, painter^ of East Hamilton, Waikato. Between waking and sleeping, under the excitement of a dream, b«~jumped out of bed and fractared the right .shoulder blade.