PLATITUDINOUS PONDEROSITY

Manawatu Herald, Volume XLVI, Issue 2730, 8 May 1924, Page 4

PLATITUDINOUS PONDEROSITY

A young; railway clerk who was desirous of showing- oil his educational qualifications, would frequently use long or unusual words in his correspondence, writes a contributor to “Humour.” This habit led to several expensive blunders, so the General Manager sent him the following letter: — “In promulgating your esoteric cogitations, and articulating your superficial sentimentalities, and amical philosophical or psychological observations, beware of platitudinous ponderosity. Let your conversational communications possess a clarified conciseness, a compacted comprehensiveness, a coalescent consistency, and a concatenated «ogency. Eschew all comglomeration of flatulent garrulity, .jejune babblement and asinine affectation. Let your extemporaneous descanting and unpremeditated expatiation have intelligibility and veracious veracity, without rhodoinonladc or thrasonical bombast, sedulously avoid all poivsyllablic profundity, ventriliquial verbosity, p.-illaceous vacuity, vaniloquant rapidity amt pompous prolixity. Shun double entendre, prurient jocosity and pestiferous profanity, obscurraiit. or apparent.” 'Tis rumoured that no letter was afterwards sent out by this clerk containing words of more than two syllables.