PARSONS AND NEWSBOYS.

Manawatu Herald, Volume XXXVI, Issue 1277, 28 July 1914, Page 4

PARSONS AND NEWSBOYS.

A SYDNEY EPISODE. The parson and the pressman were standiug In Crown Street, Sydney. The parson was the Rev R. B. S. Hammond, and the pressman a member ot the Sun staff. Some newsboys were standiug there also. One was standiug on his hands. The parson addressed a diminutive lad, who was smoking a cigarette. “My name is Hammond. lam always interested in newspaper men. I am interested in you, because I see you are advertising. It is always a good policy to advertise.”

“Come off, mister, what are yeh cornin’ at?” replied the lad, “Well,” said Mr Hammond, “whenever I see anyone with a cigarette growing out of his face I know that it is a sure sign that the rooms behind the cigarette are ‘To Let.’ I never met any young fellow yet who had sufficient brains to smoke cigarettes. The chaps I know have just got enough brains to keep off them. That’s why they have time to make good in other directions,” The parson then gave them a lecturette on the practical evils of cigarette smoking, A well-groomed city man came along for the tram. He, too, lit a cigarette. “There’s another ‘To Let’ sign, mister.” interjected one of the boys.

“I will tell you what I will do,” said Mr Hammond. “I don’t mind if I miss the next tram. There are four of you chaps here, and I will race the lot of you for 200 yards. It will be a relay race. You will each have to run only 50 yards, and I will guarantee that I will beat three out of four.”

“Is it a weight-for-age, mister?”

At the moment a motor car came by. Money passed between two of the lads. “What’s that for?” asked Mr Hammond.

“Yer see, Mister, we always have odds and evens on the big cars. I put thrippence that the last number will be even, my mate has thrippence to say it will be odd. I won. See?”

Another tram came along, and the parson and the pressman boarded it. The parson did not speak ; he was doing some hard thinking. It was the pressman who asked, “Why do they send missionaries to China ?”—Sydney Sun.